To feel like screaming?!

[peanutfoldover]

My 5 year old woke up at 12 and has been in my bed ever since. I’m 6 weeks pregnant and in the throes of pregnancy insomnia. I’m struggling to sleep for more than a few hours at a time as it is. But now I’m lying next to a hot sweaty body which is constantly wriggling and I feel so so angry. If I try and move her back to her room it will result in crying and waking my DH who needs to be up at 4.

How the actual fuck will I cope with this situation and a newborn?!

can you sneak off to her room for the rest of the night? I feel your pain, my three yr old has taken to coming in to us at 1am and then lying across our pillows/heads. He's comfy, we are very much not!

I’m not sure I could sleep in her room either tbh. Her mattress isn’t really adult friendly and her quilt is tiny.

I’m feeling very negative about everything!

I just can’t sleep when she’s lying next to me, it drives me mad.

You need better sleep solutiins. Get a proper bed for emergency sleeping arrangements.

Yes, I’ve been thinking about a really decent mattress and quilt in DD’s room. Just need to get some cash together in the new year.

If her bed isn't comfortable for you to sleep in, maybe it isn't for her and that is why she is getting in with you.
A warmer duvet may help?

Feel for you!

@Franklbaum I’ve been lying here thinking the exact same thing!

If you've not got a main present for her yet, you could give her a new bed as her present, bedding etc.
If you can't move her, you need to make sure you can sleep comfortably in her bed or somewhere else!

Kids often need comfort during tbe night, you bring pregnant dosent change that. Feeling angry won't change anything. Your child will still have night needs occasionally when your baby is born so you need to prepare yourself. Feeling angry and posting on tne Internet after only a couple of hours of the inconvenience 😒of dealing with your young child is quite extreme.

@my2bundles everyone over reacts when they're tired. She did say she is hardly sleeping anyway. Your comment is mean.

OP definitely sort out a proper bed, I often sleep in my daughters bed if she climbs in with us. She has a full sized single and a decent foam mattress with a single duvet. I also keep extra cushions in her room as I have a hip problem so I can support my hip without finding all my extra pillows in the dark!!

my2bundles She's 6 weeks pregnant. So assuming she hasn't slept for 4 weeks and has the early pregnancy exhaustion plus hormone changes, I'd say she sounds quite measured.

peanut you need to look around now to see how you can make things as easy as possible for you to sleep when the baby is here. Priority is DD's bed. It will give you more flexibility if she comes in to yours. It's not unlikely she will be unsettled when the baby arrives. Where will the baby sleep? Will you have a travel cot so you can room swap if need be?
Where will you be able to nap during the day when DD is at school? Lower your household standards if required and plan to rest when the baby is sleeping.

No white screens if you do wake in the night. Don't lie in bed trying to get to sleep. Get up and sit somewhere else - have you enough blankets etc to keep yourself warm? Music.

Kids often need comfort during tbe night, you bring pregnant dosent change that. Feeling angry won't change anything. Your child will still have night needs occasionally when your baby is born so you need to prepare yourself. Feeling angry and posting on tne Internet after only a couple of hours of the inconvenience 😒of dealing with your young child is quite extreme.

Nasty and unnecessary comment, do you have anything helpful to add @my2bundles?
Being unable to sleep is horrible op,I'd agree with getting your dd a more comfortable bed and a decent duvet. How common is it that she doesn't sleep through and gets in with you? I'm no expert but you have time before the baby is born, could you try some gentle sleep training to encourage her to stay in her own bed? Lie there and plan rather than lying there angry that may help.

Also this gets me to sleep every time:
Deep breath in to the count of 4 (breathe into your diaphragm)
Hold for the count of 7.
Let the breath out slowly for the count of 8 then repeat ten times.

I realise it's time to wake up now but try this if you're struggling again

“ Feeling angry and posting on tne Internet after only a couple of hours of the inconvenience 😒of dealing with your young child is quite extreme.”

What an awful post.

Thank you for all the replies.

@my2bundles are you ok? You seem quite angry with me which is quite an extreme reaction to a strangers post on the internet. Hopefully you will feel a little calmer knowing my daughter had no idea of my feelings, she was snuggled up and sound asleep. And to be fair to her, I would probably have been awake anyway. It was only me who suffered under the tyranny of my anger in this instance.

To everyone else.....

Her getting into my bed has reduced dramatically thank goodness! It now happens about once every 2 weeks. It seems to relate directly to how tired she is going to bed, the earlier and the less tired, the more likely it will be she will wake. At least I’m assuming she doesn’t wake on the other nights, maybe she does and she self soothes and I’m doing her an injustice. Yesterday was a very lazy day. Put the Christmas decorations up and watched a couple of films. (I was also exhausted!) So I was asking for it really! But she needed a quiet day have a very busy week.

Yes, gentle sleep training, I’m totally up for that in the daytime, in theory. But in the night, I just can’t face walking her back to her room. It’s been a long time since we tried that but it didn’t go well. Lots of crying which fully woke her and me and DH up and the alternative (in bed with me) was just less hassle. That’s how it felt last night. (And yes @my2bundles, very distressing for her too).

So yes, I agree, a decent mattress and quilt and pillows in her room could be the answer here.

Baby will be in a next to me style crib in my room for as long as possible. I’ve not looked into it fully (I don’t want to jinx anything!) but I guess if I got one that could easily go from one room to the other, the baby could just follow me wherever I go.

Thanks everyone. A new day has started and my decaf tea is slowing working its way into my system. I work full time so I can get some rest there today! Lol!