May well be me being completely unreasonable (and happy to hear if I am!) my parent died recently, I was heavily pregnant and very ill myself(we didn’t even know if the pregnancy would make it). I was struggling a lot. My parent had been sick for the past year and the passing was quite traumatic, I was staying at the hospital knowing they would pass in a few days to a week. Here is the aibu part. Dh”s parent died a year ago and there was a memorial mass when we were just about to lose my parent. He decided to skip the mass to be with us as his attitude was my parent is dead I can’t help them but I can be here for you. Really nice and I appreciated this but was also due to be admitted to hospital over how ill I was(I was only out for the circumstances as I didn’t want to not be with my parent at this horrible time. Basically dh family is annoyed he didn’t attend the mass, the mass in question was not a personalised one to one individual more a broad mass that the name was mentioned. Am i being unreasonable to think he did in fact do the right thing (even though I never would have asked him to not expect him to) and it’s a bit unfair that he is in the bad books for doing his best for us at the time? I don’t plan or want to say anything to rock the boat but I’m feeling a bit annoyed at what I think is the unfairness of it on dh!