Not sure whether this was the correct place to post really. I'm at a loss of what to do or if it's really my place to do anything and would appreciate some advice.
A little background I have a friend (ex friend now unfortunately) we met in school at 15 and were friends for around 10 years until things went a bit wrong. I will call her S for the sake of this thread. S has had a very turbulent life, her Mum was in an abusive relationship when she was growing up (S's ex step dad) so she was obviously exposed to a lot of violence. Luckily her Mum managed to escape when S was around 15/16 but moved away so she then had to move in with her Dad. When she was 16 her DS was diagnosed with cancer (her sister was only a year older than us and was part of our friendship group so they were very close). She then went a bit off the rails and started taking drugs and running away from home, hanging out with the wrong crowd and I stopped hearing from her. Fast forward about a year she got back in touch, she had been having substance misuse support and realised in order to change her ways she needed to start hanging around with people who didn't take drugs, we all welcomed her back with open arms and our friendship continued.
Unfortunately her DS battled on and off with cancer for 8 years going in and out of remission and everytime giving us hope she was cured and then it would return. She died 3 years ago and it wasn't a very pleasant death she was in a lot of pain and was on his deathbed for 3 weeks, S was by her side the whole time and was there when she took her last breath (which again was a pretty traumatic thing for her to witness as it wasn't peaceful.) S has obviously been hugely effected by her death and I think has PTSD.
Since her death she has gone completely off the rails again, completely understandable. She has been a very difficult person to remain friends with although I have tried very hard. Last year I had a pretty traumatic time myself with PND and was suicidal. Therefore I stopped messaging her/checking up on her and she made no effort to contact me either. From then our friendship has fizzled out completely which I am sad about but I can't force someone to remain friends with me and I did feel I needed to start surrounding myself with positive friends and not keep trying to save her when I don't think she wants to be saved. We still have a mutual friend (who also takes drugs although not as much as S does and this I think is the only reason their friendship has been maintained) so I still hear about her and what she's up to.
Here comes to why I am so worried. S works within a SS team and therefore deals with vulnerable children for a living (when she actually turns up to work). She uses cocaine and alcohol from Friday through to Sunday and has been known to also use through the week but the following day isn't able to go into work. She is in a relationship with someone who also uses massively. This week they have been on a 'session' and her OH has turned very violent and beat her, and smashed her house up, amongst saying some pretty awful things to her about her sister. She feared for her life and called the police (who weren't very helpful) by the time they turned up her OH had fallen asleep so they left her. Anyway the next day she threw him out and ended there relationship.
Now she has found out she is pregnant and taken him back. It's a disaster. We haven't spoken for a few months and aren't on awful terms. Is there anything I can do to help? She is a clever person she knows the risks of staying with an abusive person and the harm it will bring to a child to grow up in that environment. She has worked with DV victims through work and has also done the freedom programme due to work. She also isn't in denial she knows he's abusive she has admitted that to my friend but it's almost like she's wants to hurt or punish herself. I feel so helpless.