to think that lots of women will now be able to get financial and legal security

[PerspicaciaTick]

without having to get married.

From tomorrow you can give notice for your opposite sex civil partnership. You can actually form your partnership from January.

No need for a verbal contract or a ceremony (unless you want one). Just sign the bit of paper with your witnesses. No need to spend a fortune - you can do it all for less than £150 (or you can still go the whole hog if you want).

I think it will be really popular - or am I misreading the situation?

My aunt has been with her partner for over 20 years, but they've never married because of the associations they have with it. Ever since civil partnership became a possibility for gay couples they've said they'd love to do that.

Now it's a possibility for hetero couples, they've booked it! We haven't been invited (I didn't invite them to my wedding either to be fair) as it's very small, just immediate family, so siblings and their partners only. It's quite exciting. Neither of them will benefit financially, as neither of them have any assets aside from the jointly owned house (that still has a huge mortgage), and they are on a fairly low income. They do want to recognise the relationship though, and a cp is the way they want to do it.

I'm happy enough that it's available for all, but don't see that there'll be a huge uptake necessarily. Could be wrong though.

You can already get married without religion: any wedding at the registrar office or in a stately home, or other non-church location is already non-religious (in a registrar's office, religion is actively banned).

Cost is also not a factor. I got married for £100 in a registrar's office twenty years ago. No do, no guests. Cheaper than a will (we do have those, too)!

I wanted the dream wedding with all the frills. Dh assured me if that's what I wanted we would do it. But it would mean plans for holidays house and family would be put on hold for a few years. I. Opted for his scenario
We always said when we could afford it we would do the big wedding but we never did get around to it
We had the option to nip to. The registry office but I opted to wait for my big day.

I can't see how this new civil partnership would have made a difference

She said lots of women not women per se zsazsa. And it's not sad someone recognising the reality that CP would be more protection for women as a cohort than cohabitation. It's the fact that what she said is true that's sad.

I've said before, I'm not sure it'll make a significant difference. Because people who understood the law on marriage and had a principled and informed take on why they preferred CP, tended to be the sort who had taken steps to protect themselves anyway. It doesn't do anything to address general lack of knowledge, uninformed belief that there's no benefit to state recognition of the relationship, being too disorganised to do it or one partner not wanting the other to have legal rights. And like a OP, I think sooner or later, given the relative lack of recognition of CP abroad, a couple who weren't aware of this will run into problems when some shit hits a fan. That's never been a problem with CP same sex couples because they've never really had the option of blithely going wherever and assuming everything would be fine.

But we have universal CP now, or very soon will, so given that we're having it, I hope it is of benefit.

@JacobReesClunge people who choose civil partnerships over marriage are more likely to be clued up on the up and down sides of it due to specifically choosing it.

It is the people in relationships that don't want to commit and do the stringing along that are the issue.

Yes, my thoughts exactly. And that's why I'm not sure it'll make any significant difference.

I am sure there will be a small peak of people who want to get 'partnered' instead of married. The non-committed will just have to find another excuse.

I'm wondering what the rules and advantages are on CPs. Could this be something that my friend could take advantage of? She is in her 60s, single and lives with her elderly mother. If the mother dies and my friend has to pay inheritance tax on the property they live in, my friend will be homeless. If they had a CP, would this mean the property could pass to my friend intact? Or do CPs have vows etc? Disclaimer - I am clueless on the whole CP thing!

So your friend wants to get not-quite-married to her mum?

The form when you apply still has things about consanguinuity I think.

Good bloody luck finding a registrar that respects your wish to just sign the registry.

We went in wanting that and ended up with readings and a poem and a unity candle.

She kept asking us if we were going to get dolled up and wear lovely dresses.

In which we would likely look like the 2 ronnies in The Worm That Turned

So it's not quite the 'partnership' I had in mind then!

I've been with my partner nearly 21 years and I really want to do this to avoid having a wedding which I would find stressful because I'm socially awkward. I need to get him to agree to it

Probably not a popular opinion, but women can have financial and legal security at any time by not making themselves dependent on a man. I'm a bit tired of seeing the narrative on here that all women are dependent on men for their income and lifestyle.

Agree Screaming. I was disappointed to read the OP to find out the way women could get financial and legal security was via 'partnership'.
Have we been transported back to 1950?

Probably not a popular opinion, but women can have financial and legal security at any time by not making themselves dependent on a man

That! Marriage shouldn't be about security. After all, what is the security of one is the risk for the other. I think a number of men are more aware of women wanting to marry them mainly for their own security, especially second marriages.

The time of women being forced to be home and therefore having no choice but to be vulnerable have gone. Women can delay having children, can opt to go to work, PT or FT.

Marriage is a great establishment, the ultimate proof of commitment, but commitment should be about much more than security.

I think a lot of people have long engagements not because they don't want to get married but because they want a big wedding and don't want to compromise. I think this could work well if people can make it into a marriage later. I quite like that idea

Over-generalised would be the best description, I think. Some women can obtain financial security by not making themselves dependent on a man, yes. Equally, it's the reality that there are often caring and reproductive penalties falling on women that you can't necessarily opt out of (sometimes not even by not actually having kids!) and there are all kinds of structural reasons why these exist.

Personally I'm tired of seeing the narrative on here of oh, just earn more yourself and that'll sort it. It's no more accurate or useful than just telling women to get married. The picture is complex.

A major plus of CP over marriage for me is that the CP form has your mother's details on it, as opposed to the marriage certificate which just has the father's. For many, including those who have never known their father, that's pretty important.

Interesting that it's mainly women on NMW that enable other women to be financially independent. The majority of childcare workers will never earn enough to independently buy a property, raise children, pay into a good pension etc while maintaining a good standard of living.

That is a decent point but you left out the bit about NMW childcare workers allowing men to be financially independent too. When a child is cared for in a setting that essentially requires state subsidy for the workers low wages, it isn't only the mother who's relying on this structure to work.

I would imagine that women who are too ignorant/downtrodden to demand marriage before sacrificing financial independence will be equally ignorant/downtrodden when it comes to civil partnership.

Dp and I being both women sort-of enable one another to be financially better off in some ways.
We both had a bit more expendable income when we lived separately and rented.
But now we are paying off a mortgage we would not have been able to get on our own.

I think a genuine partnership can benefit both parties. It depends if you both have a similar attitude to money and responsibilities.

And equality.

I'm one of the people who is more likely to get a CP than marriage so some fairly tenuous reasons.

I can't put it into words we'll but it just feels more us. I like the idea of coming into the partnership as two equals rather than marriage with all the historic baggage of ownership women being transferred as property from one man to another.

I've not been keen on marriage because of this association.

We've agreed to get married / partnered but we agreed together, it was very important to me there was no proposal or engagement ring.

A CP just somehow frees things up and allows some of the old traditions to be shaken off IMO

It's one of those intangible things which just feels right to me

As a PP said though, we're the sort of people who have already got lots of legal protection in place, though it will sew things up in terms of me being next of kin in case he had an accident etc

And I do earn a pretty good salary on my own, but who knows what will happen in the future? It's good to have the legal protection that is I should have some awful accident and be unable to work again, and my DH had a personality transplant and decided to leave me after the accident , things financially would be a lot fairer for me that if we stayed as we are just cohabiting etc

I think all the people this isn't an important development for presumably don't have the same issues with marriage as I do

You can't have a civil partnership with your mum. How utterly ridiculous.

Personally I don't see the need for this at all. If you don't want a big wedding you don't have to have one, just turn up at the registry office in your jeans with a couple of witnesses and get married. Similar cost to a civil partnership, no fuss, same end result.

Out of interest owls have you given much thought to the unpleasant historic baggage of CP? I don't want to put you off if you feel it's right for you but I'd be interested to know.