Partner and estranged child

[Sunshine245]

Hi my partner and I have been together 9 years we now have two children and live a wonderful life together but before us my partner had another child him and the mother both being very young with the pressure of a new baby they split but she refused contact straight away so my partner persisted to make contact eventually when the child was around 2 and the ex was newly single she simply left the child with us for a weekend which I found strange as we were strangers but my partner was happy this contact continued a few months but then abruptly stopped with no reason for it. Years passed my partner trying to make contact sometimes faced with a wall of silence sometimes it would go as far as making arrangements for them to be ignored last minute, my partner has persistently tried to make contact but always been reluctant to go down the legal route as he felt it would create a bigger issue And be an unpleasant experience for the child specially as he was never named on the birth certificate. Our dd is now aware and would like to meet her half sibling also, as a mother I don’t understand refusing contact when the other parent is genuinely trying to make contact and co parent civilly any suggestions on what to do next?

He should have taken legal action the first time he was 'refused' ie when the child was a baby. Regular contact should have been instigated by him, not blame the mother all the time. To be blunt, your child wanting to meet a half sibling is of no relevance to the other child. He needs to establish regular contact and a loving relationship with his first child before the whole half sibling thing is even mooted. He sounds so unmotivated, does he actually want contact beyond the idea of the 'siblings' meeting? What has he paid in child maintenance all the time he's been lapse/non existent with contact? I suspect that is one of the issues he's 'reluctant' to go down the legal route?

Rather than court proceeding and orders it should be fun to have time with parents not formal and mandatory no?

I imagine it’s more fun to have time with your parent than none at all.

(This thread was never going to go down well).