To feel so alone

[Lonesome54321]

I feel like I'm quite alone. Haven't kept up with friends and feel so isolated. Need help to get myself together again. Stand on my own at the school gates. Feel bad about myself. Feel unable to connect with people. Enjoy chatting and have always felt I need to be around people, but just feel unworthy somehow and unable to connect. Just feel so sad that I dont have many friends tbh. Not sure what I'm asking, but just need a point in the right direction. I do have lots of acquaintances in work and a couple of hobbies.

So sorry to hear you are feeling isolated. Is there anyone amongst your aquaintances that you could invite over for a cuppa and cake? I find in that sort of 1 to 1 scenario that friendships develop more naturally than they do at the school gates or at work, it's relaxed and more personal, you get more time to chat in depth. Might that be something you could do? I tend to hold people at arms length until I get to know them better and make about 1 really close friend every 10 years - quality not quantity, that's the way to go.

The people you see chatting at school aren't necessarily friends do remember - it might just be that their dc are play date buddies, or they've seen the same face since nursery.
I think it can be hard to break into groups like that.
Would the people at work be open to a night out or starting a book group or something like that?

Thank you Magic. I often feel very self conscious and on edge when it's just me and one other person. I panic that I'll get stuck for things to say. Often better if there's 3 of us. But yes, a good idea

Thank you hopeless. Good idea. I guess I feel worried that I'll try to arrange something and that no-one would want to go. Gosh, I sound a barrel of laughs dont I..! At heart, I'm a social being (I think) but for some reason I'm struggling

Can you volunteer to do some charity type work (especially over Christmas) and meet some new people. Widening the numbers of people you mix with may help. It will help you feel you are helping others and may make you feel better about yourself.

Am sorry you feel lonely OP. As well as the suggestions above, why not try getting in touch with people you haven't kept up with? They might actually be really pleased to hear from you again! (And if not, you're no worse off for having tried with a text or an wmail). Hope you feel better soon.

Blue, I think you've hit the nail on the head. Take my focus off myself

Glad to help.