IABU - I'm upset over dd2 having a tonsils removed.

[Whatsername177]

I realise I'm probably being silly, but dd2 needs to have her tonsils removed. She had several tonsillitis infections last year leading to her developing sepsis in March. Thankfully, she was diagnosed and treated quickly and made a full recovery. However, she was referred to ENT due to how seriously ill she became. The first assessment highlighted big tonsils and advised 'watch and wait'. We had the follow up appointment today. She has had a couple of viral bouts of tonsillitis in the last 5 months but no need for antibiotics. The consultant seemed like he was going to discharge her, until he examined her. He was concerned her palate was high and arched, she snores and her breathing is shallow, plus her glands were enlarged. He then said that in cases like this infection almost always reoccurs and he would highly recommend they are removed. I signed the forms and we are on the waiting list. I just feel sad and worried. I know it's a routine OP. I don't know why I feel like this. Any stories or advice?

DS had tonsils and adenoids removed a week after his 3rd birthday - watching have the GA was awful

From the minute he came round he was a different child!

Hardest part of aftercare was trying to stop him running around

My DS had his tonsils and adenoids out and it’s the best thing we ever did.

Touch wood, he is very rarely ill.

My dd had hers out when she was 5. It was very straight forward. She was up and eating as soon as she came back to the ward. Crunchy things are suggested these days, as they are supposed to keep the area free from infection. Crisps instead of ice cream!

My Ds has his out last summer, never had tonsillitis but he had sleep apnea and giant tonsils. He was a bit ropey the day of the op, mainly because they wouldn't let him have the canula out until 5 hours after the op and he really didn't like having it in. He recovered brilliantly and went back to school after a week. It has been life changing for him.

DS had adenoids and tonsils out just before he turned 3. It was an overnight stay and Im a bit confused which aspects were for the tonsils and which for adenoids but: We gave continuous meds for 7 days, full daily dose of paracetamol and ibuprofen. I gave it to him overnight. One thing that did help was that I gave him the 6 plus stuff - relative to his weight. That meant I could give him a small amount of the strong stuff in the night and not have to wake him up too much. If I left him without meds overnight he would be in pain and hysterical when he woke up. Read up on it but the pain gets worse before it gets better - I think peak is days 3-5. 2 weeks isolation after, with as little contact with people as possible.

Worst bit was having to put him under with gas, hospital had wanted to give him anaesthetic with an injection but didn't do the prep in time so had to use the gas. He thrashed around and was terrified. Same when he woke up. (I suspect they got his weight wrong and have him too much anaesthetic as it took him an extra hour to come round.) However he is now nearly 6 and doesn't remember it at all. He was eating as soon as he was properly awake, he was starving as he had been nil by mouth for so long - he was 1st on the list but didn't get taken down until about 2pm. We were advised to bring something in he would like to eat - he was scoffing brioche rolls as soon as he was fully awake and then he had hospital ice cream. He had an overnight stay and having my Mum come and visit for an hour or so in the evening so I could eat and go to the toilet was important as the nurses were too busy to have sat with him.

In my case my DS largely refused to co-operate with the ENT consultant - she didn't appear to have seen a child before! So the op was largely based on what I said about his breathing difficulties. I also had to chase and threaten to make the op happen as either the hospital or the CCG lost his paperwork and both blamed the other. However surgeon came out afterwards and said it was a good job it had been done as it was a bad case. DS is now back to his normal expected size, (on about 90th centile as birth weight was) he started putting on weight and was healthier immediately, he has dropped down to 25th centile and was noticeably small for his age just before his op.

I had mine out at 15 and I’m so glad I did! I had several years of having tonsillitis every 6 weeks, always followed by a chest infection too. Tonsils out and no more tonsillitis or chest infections.

Recovery is supposed to be worse when you are older - mine bled and I had to gargle peroxide 🤢, and I vomited for about two weeks which they think was a reaction from the GA. I wish I’d had them done younger in many ways!

Yes there are long wait lists to remove tonsils so I would go ahead with OP. If your DD has large tonsils if they become infected it can be quite serious and children can become very ill and have difficulty breathing.

My dd had hers out a few years ago (think she was about 6) she's thrived since. I had mine out as an adult the recovery is a lot worse than in kids. The hardest thing for dd was no school /socialising for 2 weeks. Lots of books, TV, colouring, dds teacher also sent home a few of the sessions he was teaching so that she didn't get behind with her school work.
Have a stock of soft foods and toast (they advise toast post op). Dd had jelly and ice cream, rice pudding, cold chicken soup, everything had to be cold. Where as I couldn't cope with cold things or to hot. I had mainly soup and scrambled eggs.
Re GA all three my dc have had numerous anesthetics it doesn't get easier however rest assured they do there best for each child when your child's in theatre it won't take too long make sure you eat and drink during this time you need to keep your strength up to care for dd. It's a worry but was worth it for the improved health.

My DS had a major op (not tonsils but GA) just before he was 3. I was frightened at the thought of watching him go under GA, but a mate who's a surgeon said "There will be 1-2 people whose job is JUST to watch him breathe and monitor his heart-rate. Arguably, it's the safest sleep he's ever had," and that helped a bit.
On the day, (and this might be different for you, because I was in America at the time) they gave him a medicine to sedate him, then we had a cuddle, then they rolled him into the OR while I was with him, and I watched him go under, and it looked just like watching him go to sleep (with extra tubes, I suppose, but not scary, no thrashing about or anything) and he was clearly so well looked after with so many people standing around him that it was easy to leave him in their hands. I mean, not EASY, but also not terrifying.
I feel for you, because I remember it well. Actually on the day, going to get a cup of tea and waiting for the op to be over, it was alright. The day before I was nervy mess.
You'll be fine, and your little one will be fine. Remember, the GA is carefully watched and everyone in the room is there to make sure it works right.

Tonsillectomy wouldn't have been suggested had it not been necessary, it is less routine than it was years ago.

My son was 15 when his were taken out and the operation was really necessary by then. He did have pain for a whole day, was given analgesia, but then it went quite suddenly. He's been fine since.

I had tonsils and adenoids removed aged four and I'm OK.

Nobody wants to think of their child having an operation but, honestly, your daughter will be fine.

It’s horrible now, but the surgery is actually more horrible the older you get. The complications from tonsillectomies actually become more severe. Your little one is highly unlikely to remember this surgery in the long term. The benefits definitely outweigh the risk. You will find they recover pretty quickly and will become more adventurous eaters and their overall health improves. I’m sorry you’ve had such a rough trot though. It’s always hard on little ones.

My version of the op was go in, get put under, try not to die, wake up, get chucked out to make your way home.

No cosy nights in hospital being monitored or fed.

HOWEVER - once the post op pain had gone and the various lumps of evil had been coughed out, I didn't snore anymore, I didn't feel as though I was choking all the time, I could do a shirt collar up without feeling like I was being strangled and, other than a couple of occasions where my other glands come up a bit, I haven't had a single problem since.

Oh, and I found that I could sing. A lifetime of being told I was terrible, gone.

@haveuheard any child at work whose dose works out at more than 5 ml of paracetamol gets 6+. Especially if they are terrible at taking it. It's worked out on weight so doesn't matter if you use 6+.

Just get it done. Antibiotics again and again are far worse for a child. It isn’t a pleasant experience for them but it’s so much better for them in the long run. My daughter has never been sick again since getting hers taken out. That was 3 years ago.

It is a worrying time as a parent when an op is necessary.
Keep it in perspective.

Thanks for all of the anecdotes. They help a lot. It was never in question that we wouldn't follow the consultants advice so she will be having the op. I just need to learn to be brave. This kid, honestly. She was a rainbow baby, resuscitated at birth having had the cord around her neck, has febrile seizures (harmless but bloody scary), the sepsis infection (the most terrifying thing I've ever been through). I worry about her anyway but these little events make it so much worse. I dunno. Kids eh? Right. Pulling my big girl pants up now.

You’re doing it at the right time as she’s still young! I had mine out as an adult and the pain and recovery was horrific. They’re usually really kind and explain everything, you feel a tiny scratch when the anaesthetic goes in and then the next thing you know you’re awake again. Good luck to her!

@iamtinkerbella Yes- you usually always have to stay overnight after a general anaesthetic. I stayed just one night. the next day they wouldn't let me leave until I had eaten something rough like toast or cornflakes. My kids were very young when I had it done and the hardest thing was I couldn't talk- my voice kept coming out really soft and raspy! Do it- get it over with, short term pain is much better than long term agony. You''ll be fine.

You are doing the right thing OP it will save her a lot of illness.

I had my adenoids our aged 7 and tonsils aged 8. Straightforward recovery. Anaesthetist came to see me before hand and asked me how much I weighed. I told him then asked him how much he weighed.

I had my tonsils out (not that long ago). It has changed my life. I used to get horrible tonsillitis at least once a year- like swallowing glass. So nasty. And then I got quinsy and guttate psoriasis. I am so happy they were removed. No more sore throats or hideous infections. You’re definitely doing the right thing for your daughter. You know that anyway; just reinforcing with another positive tale 🙂
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Be very glad she is having the op done! It will be the best thing for her. I am in the early stages of getting a referral due to DD's snoring/mouth breathing/possible apnea and I am worried I will have a battle on my hands.

I had mine out aged 45, after decades of horrible suffering with Quinsy, all sorts of horrific side effects, Ill health from Nov to March every year, so many complications with every sore throat I had.

Took me weeks to recover. I was due to have them out, aged 5, but my mum pulled me out of the list the day before.

DS had his tonsils and adenoids done aged 3, due to horrendous sleep apnoea and other stuff. He was running around in the hospital play park the hour after the discharge and apart from discomfort swallowing, he was fine within a few days

Get them done now,