Glorious bitchy moment

[NC5squillion]

know I am being unreasonable, but I am also having a glorious bitch gloating moment.

Over 10 years ago my DSs father did an up and run. I was fortunate in that I had a good job and could afford to support us both. I didn’t go after child support, until a few years ago when I started getting nasty emails and was confronted by his family in the supermarket....the reason being that apparently I was making unreasonable financial demands and I was financially ruining him.

Now considering at this point I’d never seen a penny, not a single penny of contribution, I even had to send changes of clothes on visits... so I mean not a solitary penny. The man is a habitual liar (another so long a story it’s unreal) - but this really pissed me off to the point I applied for CMS.

It got awarded, it was never paid, it was then reduced to the princely sum of £9 a month, which was also never paid ever........ now to my bitch moment......finally it’s gone to attachment of earnings.... now considering he told everyone that happened to him years ago, and still tells everyone that will listen that I bleed him dry - karma :). It’s not about the money, but it has a sense of what you Reep you sow.

I know I am being unreasonable, and a complete bitch on this, but after decades of dealing with that arsehole - this moment feels quite sweet. There will be an embarrassment of the attachment of earnings at his workplace and an embarrassment of the pittance he actually pays. And as I’m already painted as the bitch & apparently did this years ago - who cares 😂

Karma. It's wonderful.
My EXH told me 20 years ago that I would never get a penny from him, and I didn't.....until 3 years ago when the Csa attached a possession order on his house for £20,000 of unpaid maintenance.
I raised DS on a humble, but hard working wage, and he turned out just fine, graduated university last year.
EXH pays £250 a month to clear the debt, will take him years, no pity at all, these people think they can get away with it.
I warned him that it would catch up with him in the end one day.
I was right.

You gloat all you want OP. Men aho don't support their children are scum! I don't get why he'd say you get money off him though, unless his family are wanting money off him for something and he has to claim being skint..

@scrabblecrazy that’s amazing news.

Good for you OP. Does he have a second family? I hope he is ashamed of himself.

These vile men astound me, having a child is a massive privilege- any normal person would want to pay for them to ensure they have a good life.

@Rainbowtheunicorn he did have a second family - hence the reduction to the £9. He upped and left them as well. What a toss Pott, but has the money for expensive designer tattoos and the weed (that's another story). I remember getting grief from that particular girlfriend on how I was using my son as a pawn - because i wanted my son to be able to take part in his local football team every week - apparently this was stressful and was impacting on his family time.

I know how you feel. My ex has never given anything for my son and makes out like I am the awful one. It turned out after a financial investigation he earns £180k a year. I have been at home as a carer for our son, living on next to nothing and friends and family have paid for essential diagnoses privately. He left our son not getting the help he needed, as I couldn't afford to complete the assessments he needed. We had to wait three years on the NHS. He owes £18k of maintenance from one year and he is apparently now claiming benefits so they can't touch him or take any further action. He has hidden all his assets.

I was confronted by one of my exes friends demanding to know why I was "being paid" x amount for our child and.amimg ktnskund as though I was living the high life. He'd evidently complained to all and sundry as the exact amount was quoted back to me as though it was wrong that maintenance should be paid . I was furious and told him to keep it buttoned in future as the only two people who should have known was him and me, plus the CSA (then) and I doubted that they would broadcast it. Tosser.

Congratulations OP. I also think it should be mandatory when separation happens or parents arent together that within 3 months CS is set up. So many woman scared of being labelled as out to financially ruin a man, dont ask for what is due to them, then struggle. Also it shouldn't go down when he has a new shiny family. People have to consider their current outgoings before bringing a new baby into the mix. If these men had to contribute meaningfully to the upbringing of their children a lot of "second, do-over" families wouldn't exist and they would be forced to be more responsible.

If the family confront you again, just look puzzled and tell them they must be mistaking you for another one of his baby mommas cos you've had nothing in x years and your DC is finally being awarded £9 per month from their father. It is not your money but your childs so remind them of that.

I just love how this is a family business and it’s going to be visible for those fuckers to see. Lying, feckless toad.

Well done OP. Also love that he can't moan to anyone about it, as they'll all think he's been paying for years so he'll be caught in his own lie, CF

Oh that must feel very satisfactory!

Oh it just gets better, I've got the confirmation letter and it will commence in January for double the amount 😂 still tiny but it's double the really pathetic amount. There is karma in this world.

My ex wouldn’t pay any money and rang me to have a go at me for contacting the CSA. I hadn’t, it was his other ex who had. So I rang CSA and said to add my child on because in those days you paid one amount shared by how many children you were paying for.

He ended up paying maintenance for a lot longer than he would have, had he not shouted at me, because our child was younger. He never quite got over that