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AIBU?

To hate Christmas present wish lists

32 replies

AquaFaba · 29/11/2019 13:07

Yes; they are helpful when buying gifts for children.
But I really resent adult members of the family sending over wish lists of gifts. It just feels so ....grabby.
I can’t help but feel it just reduces Christmas down to one long shopping fest; totally strips out the element of festive bonhomie.

I wasn’t brought up this way; perhaps I’m in the minority.
Do other families send out wish lists for gifts? Not just for children, but adults too.

OP posts:
bumpysleighridejack · 29/11/2019 21:12

My ILs tell DH exactly what they want, i.e 'buy me this specific item of amazon.' I think it sucks the joy out myself, I don't mind being given rough ideas but why not just buy said item yourself if you don't want the giver putting any thought in? Also annoys me because we then have to spend what they've asked when they have plenty of money, and we're only just getting by with young kids. Rant over, they do buy for our family so can't complain. I'm used to my family where you get each other smaller more thoughtful gifts and no pressure to spend money if you don't have it.

ILearnedItFromABook · 29/11/2019 21:26

Sending a wish list out of the blue is strange and probably even rude, but in my family, they're typically requested, because it can be difficult to know what to buy for people. I try to come up with several ideas, so it's not quite so boring (and so there's something for any budget).

If I don't receive a wish list or suggestion from another person, I usually just give cash in a card, because I'm sick of guessing what someone wants and potentially throwing money down the drain on something they won't use. (And inspiration doesn't often provide a perfect gift idea of my own, unfortunately.)

Figmentofmyimagination · 29/11/2019 21:27

Actual links are a bit cringy - but with my own teenage children I must admit it’s quite useful and I’m used to it now. Hate it when someone outside my immediate family sends me a link though, especially if unsolicited.

MidnightMystery · 29/11/2019 21:44

I don't like being asked what I want nor do I like asking what others want it makes me feel awkward! So I defo don't like the adult wish list that is grabby 😂🤦🏻‍♀️

DisplayPurposesOnly · 29/11/2019 21:59

I like wish lists for all the reasons everyone else who likes them has said. We only do them with the immediate family (six of us); it helps as we live a long way apart and so we're not always au courant with each other's latest fads & whims.

Also, ours aren't compulsory: it's perfectly fine to go 'off list'.

I can what people mean about taking the joy out of it BUT I can say I am really excited about what's on my list so I will be really pleased to get anything from it. I'm quite joyous at the prospect Grin

Snog · 29/11/2019 22:00

Think they are a great idea to help avoid presents that are neither wanted not needed

rookiemere · 29/11/2019 22:45

I'd mentioned not doing presents to SIL a few weeks ago and she confirmed last night she thought it was a great idea. There's something pretty soul destroying about having to think of 6 or so items that I want that cost under £20 and then clicking on everyone else's list to purchase their items. DS 13 will still get everyone small gifts but we're saved most of the trouble and expense for adults.

However after a few not so good years of presents I tell DH exactly what I want. This year it's new walking boots but in Christmas sales.

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