To be upset he didn't comment on my hair?

[Fuckenstein]

My DP always asks me to dye my hair back to red as he likes it best that way. I have had several colours and styles and everytime I go to the hairdresser he says to get it red. It is boob length and thick so lots of it!

Well today I did get it red (from blonde). We had a snap chat conversation and 10 photos into the conversation he still hadn't mentioned it.

So I said I was quite upset as it just shows exactly how much attention he pays to me that he could look at 10 pictures and not even notice I had coloured my hair. Specifically the colour he bangs on about all the time. It's not like a few highlights here.

He told me to grow up.

So AIBU to think he should have noticed?

Things aren't great between us at the moment so it just feels like another blow.

Lovely hair! Not-lovely partner.
Why waste your time on him - there are nicer and kinder men out there.

I take your opinion of snapchat on board. Its nice to see each other, we don't live together.

Hmm I would like to believe that was the case but it was hardly a serious conversation.

Thanks, I feel much better, you are all so kind. I think it is just a symptom of our bigger problems. He is always putting me down and making out he is too good for me. Just another kick. I dobt know why I bother to be honest. That's why I wasn't sure if I was being overly sensitive and reading too much onto it.

(Please don’t pay any attention to the comments re snapchat. Me and my partner/friends use it a lot, it’s a silly and fun way to communicate 🙄 why anyone would have an issue with this beyond me)

You look great, jealous of how well you take a photograph. 😩

I think it is just a symptom of our bigger problems. He is always putting me down and making out he is too good for me.

Can you er, get rid of him?

@CSIblonde well excuse me, but your post of Thu 28-Nov-19 20:28:38 says:

Expecting people to notice stuff you're excited about usually leads to disappointment IME

'People' as in 'your partner' really should be able to make a comment about different hair especially when it's something they have a strong opinion about. Clearly this is a symptom of something more.

Anyway @Fuckenstein, it looks lovely and is quite different from your previous hair so he's clearly just being a cunt for the sake of it.

I always think my massive beak dominates my pictures but we are our own worst critics aren't we.

I guess I am going to have to, it's been on the rocks for awhile but as they say breaking up is hard to do.

I can't very well say, you didnt compliment my hair therefore we are over.

Dump him

Don’t let him put you down. My dh always tells me I’m gorgeous even when I’m obviously not.
A dp should cherish you and if he doesn’t then you need to put yourself first with someone who will.

Your new hair colour looks amazing and really suits you!

Maybe he was just disappointed because he likes it really red (which needs dying weekly to stay vibrant) so when I said I was going back to red soon he expected it to be like it has been before. He probably thinks it's not red enough.

I feel I am at an age now where the more toned down look suits me more though.

He likes it like this.

Love the red on you. You're very pretty. Partner is a grumpy what-not

You have the same facial structure as me, and let me tell you - it ages well! your hair looks great!

Maybe he has some colour blind condition?
In all honesty, you don’t need him or his (lack of) comments.
BTW, the colour looks great and you can wear it any colour you want even glow in the dark green you’d still look gorgeous!

He does sound like a massive jerk (atm at least) but keep in mind there are some on MN that will pretty much say "dump him" at the first hint of disrespect.

As if relationships are a dime a dozen or that people don't go thru shitty phases.

You are really pretty with great cheekbones and your hair is lovely.

You said “He is always putting me down and making out he is too good for me. Just another kick. ” - you can do better! I wouldn’t stay with someone like this.

Nah, but you can say "you are always putting me down and making out you are too good for me and that's why I'm dumping you."

Who gives a shit if he is 'disappointed', he's not a five year old on Christmas morning, you aren't his property - that marking his territory behaviour you described is so controlling and not love.

Your hair really suits you red by the way and I am envious of it looking at my straggly bits. The only thing I could say is maybe because he didn't see it in real life and people use filters and whatnot on snapchat, he didn't pay much heed to it. I wouldn't either. I am so used to everything being edited now, even filters putting eyebrows and makeup on people, I ignore what they look like online/chatting etc.