'what a waste' is offensive?

[TellMeEveryrhing]

NC as could be outing as friends on here

I am not a lesbian, but I scream inside when I hear a man say 'what a waste' about an attractive woman who is homosexual. Maybe they think it's a compliment in their little world, but I view it as misogynistic, viewing women as possessions or sexual objects just for the gratification of men. A man I know said this today, and when I asked him what he meant by that he said 'just a waste when i think how much a man could enjoy being with her'

AIBU or extreme to think this, is it just a harmless comment?

I’ve only ever heard women say this

Older members of my family express surprise to learn that a very good-looking male friend of mine is gay. "But he's such a handsome man!" As if they think people only "turn gay" because they can't attract a member of the opposite sex

Why did this thread require a name change?

I would say YABU because I’ve never heard a man say this - but I have heard it from quite a few women about gay men.

I dunno. I’ve heard more women say that about gay men than men say it...

It's something that both sexes say, no need to get upset about it, it's called life. We've just discussed a new film in the pub, bemoaning the absence of Colin FIrth and how he would never look as good as he did in his wet white shirt!