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Struggles with work/life or AIBU?

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behindthesmile · 27/11/2019 13:05

Hi all, I'm new to MN so apologies if I've posted in the wrong place or if I'm a bit slow to catch up with forum chat . I've got loads going on in my life just now and I'm struggling big time. Long story short, my marriage of almost 10 years fell apart last year when my ex decided to end it by sending me a text whilst he was abroad for work. Needless to say I felt that my whole world fell apart around me. There are no children as we couldn't have them and we also tried IVF which didn't work out for us.
Following his text, I was breaking up inside but I tried to keep going and pretending to the outside world everything was ok for about 3 months until I almost had a nervous breakdown at work . I went and seen my GP who signed me off for 6 months and also prescribed medication which I am still taking. I returned to work a few months back as I felt I needed to get back into a routine although the situation with my ex is still dragging out and I still haven't come to terms with it. Going back to work was a bit hectic at first but slowly I started "enjoying" it to some degree as I felt independent, etc. No one apart from management know about my personal situation as I'm not very close to work colleagues and TBH I wouldn't really like to tell them about my situation as it would just be a bit gossip for them. However the cracks feel like they are slowly reappearing. Everyone is my office seems to be obsessed about talking non stop about their kids and this is really starting to get to me. I know a lot of people will think that I should just suck it up but Idk how to when every day from 9-5 its the same conversation nonstop. Mostly its getting to me because I know its something I'm never going to probably have and almost because it reminds me of the dreams that my ex and I had about our future which came crumbling down every time we TTC. But from a business POV I work in a busy office environment where the phones are always ringing and when my colleagues are busy in their conversations, the calls are often getting ignored or answered by the same staff therefore putting further work pressure on said staff. I have thought about having a chat with my manager but from past experience I know her response will be that I'm probably being too sensitive. As said earlier, I am still on medication and regularly see my GP and also a counsellor.
Anyone who has been in a similar situation, I would be grateful for any advice who can offer on how to deal with this. Also your thoughts on this. Much love xx

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