To ask for a kick up the bum (exercise related)

[Pepperwand]

I have never been fit, ever. I was one of those kids that was always a bit chubby and came last in the running races at school. I'm not obese but I'm at least 2 stone overweight and chronically unfit, do no exercise and get out of breath easily. I'm only in my early 30s and have two young children and I'm just sick of feeling like this so took the massive step (for me) of joining the gym. I've been saying to DH recently that I'm desperate for some time to myself so am trying to frame it as going to the gym a couple of evenings a week could be my "me time".

Anyway, my local gym make all new members sign up to a session with a personal trainer for a baseline fitness test and I absolutely don't want to do it! I realise I need to be shown how to use the equipment and the PT said he'll gauge my fitness and talk about my goals and tailor an exercise progrmame to suit. I'm just totally embarrassed about what bad shape I'm in and really don't want others to see. It takes an hour apparently and I'm just dreading it. Please please talk me into doing it and not canceling!

Do it! Everybody else is too busy worrying about what they look like and doing their own thing to notice you and the PT will have seen all levels of ability including plenty of people less fit and able than you.

I’m also about 2 stone over and felt self conscious initially but most gyms have a wide range of body types and fitness levels. Now I just go and do my thing, barely think about it and don’t really notice anybody else. I absolutely love feeling fit and strong even if I’m still a bit wobbly and it’s so motivating seeing yourself improve a little each time.

Having said that if they want your custom they shouldn’t be forcing you to do anything you’re not comfortable with. Just talk with the PT and explain your concerns. They’re not going to laugh or make you do anything you’re not happy doing.

Gyms aren't just for fit people, they're for people to commence a fitness programme as well

What aspect of your fitness most bothers you?

Probably just my insecurity around getting ridiculously sweaty and out of breath if I have to run for more than a minute!

I'm like you -- but almost 20 years older! I've just done this, last week. It's not like a fitness TEST. They don't get you to run till you pass out or anything. They ask you what you want from the gym (to get thinner and fitter, duh) and then take you into the different machines and get you to do like 3 minutes on each one. At your pace. When you get tired/sore/want to throw up and go home, you just stop.

Remember, you're paying THEM. You're in charge.

It's honestly fine, even fun! My induction was with a lovely woman my age and we just bitched about getting older for 45 minutes. It was a laugh. I was so nervous too but it was good.

Do it!

Put it in the calendar like any other appointment and just go. I've just joined a new gym and every day there's someone new being shown round. No one pays them any attention.

Go for it!
You are the paying customer, if the PT makes you feel uncomfortable then say so.
Is there perhaps a woman PT available? [not they are necessarily any 'kinder' of course]
And seconding what others have said: all shapes and sizes go to the gym, I'm over 60 now and have actually found the beautiful god-like young things to be very helpful and supportive.

Is it the right type of gym for you? What type is it? My current gym doesn’t do that; but it’s not the traditional DW Fitness type place.

Have you looked at other options?

Go, do it and enjoy the post exercise dopamine!

Good personal trainers don't expect people to be fit when they first pitch up, they get pleasure from seeing you improve under their guidance and help!

I still sometimes have to force myself to do exercise - it's too hot/cold, I don't feel well - the excuses are endless - but once you start you really will feel so much better.

The best thing is that when I'm at my fittest I hardly ever get colds!

stand in the mirror and ask yourself do i want my children to follow my example. Do this for them and for you. be the example

I hate PTs, but think if you haven't been to a gym before and are unfit I would suggest you let them do a programme for you and show you how to move properly and do everything. I'd also advise getting yourself checked out by the GP as well before starting.

Everyone is too busy staring at themselves in the mirror to notice you.

I agree, just go! I've got two young children, the youngest of which is 17 weeks. I have been putting off starting to exercise for a while now...and then I read something that said 'stop over thinking it and do it'. Obviously a massive cliche but I found I was thinking about it so much I was just coming up with more and more reasons why I COULDN'T start. Last week I just thought, fuck this! And I did it. Put the babies down for their naps and just went for it, and have done every other day since then.
It's not much but it's a start. You have to begin somewhere, no one is going to laugh at you or think you are silly because they have all been there too.
You never regret a work out.

Do it! Do it do it do it. No need to be embarrassed, PTs have seen it all. And they'll just be impressed that you're putting the effort into changing.

I was a bit like you at school, but I got into exercise as a young adult and now you would never have guessed. In fact you'd think I'd been one of the sporty kids if you saw me in the gym! It's never too late.

I had to get over the fact that I'm not the kind of person who goes to the gym. It turns out all sorts go the gym and if I want to be stronger and healthier than before. I go to the gym.

Take a positive point from the baseline fitness test - from your description you are very unfit so your progress (if you do the fitness test every 2-3 weeks) will be phenomenally better and more impressive than someone who is fairly fit already! You will probably be the PT's dream client as someone who starts from where you say you are can only get better plus you won't have any preconceived ideas about how exercises 'should' be done 'because that's how you were shown when you last went to the gym in 1986' -

If you go and truly hate it, what have you lost apart from an hour of time? Trust me -in a gym no one is looking at anyone else. The posers are too busy admiring themselves in the mirror, the newbies will be sympathetic to your fears and most of the rest will just be full of admiration for anyone starting their fitness addiction

Hi OP, I joined the gym 3 1/2 weeks ago. It was nothing like I'd expected, having done the gym thing around 15 years ago I remember all kinds of young fit men standing around looking intimidating (probably just me).
This experience is completely different. The mix of people is, well, mixed and varied. The PTs come and go with different people at different times, show them the ropes etc. They seem a great bunch.

But the real reason I'm here is to say, OMG, my body has changed so dramatically in less than a month that I can hardly believe it. I do go 4 times a week but I don't do huge sessions or anything, just 45mins to an hour.
That first day I really didn't want to go and now every time I think can I be bothered, I think of that first day and how far I've come. I also feel like an old hand already.

Everyone has to start somewhere and seeing a PT is not only important for safety if you are a complete novice, but really important to help get the most out of your time there. They are not there to judge but if they were they would judge someone making the effort to change very positively.

The first step is the hardest, take it and embrace the new you. Your future self is already high fiving you for this.

I was in a similar position 5/6 years ago; mid-thirties, weight had crept up by a couple of stone and I'd never really exercised so was massively unfit. I started running (couch to 5k - 30 seconds is a long time when you've never run before!) and doing home workouts because I was too worried about what other people would think of me at the gym. After reaching 40 I finally thought "who gives a shit!" and started boxing at the local club and going to fitness classes at the gym. I'm fitter and more toned than I've ever been, just wish I'd done it sooner. Nobody will judge you, the people I meet range from hardened gym goers to complete beginners and everyone supports each other. Also, PTs are there to help and advise you no matter how fit you are. I've spoken to a few at my local gym and the thing they love about their job is helping people change their lives and get healthier and fitter.

Thank you so much for the words of encouragement. I just wanted to say that I went this morning and wow it was intense, I think I had a very over enthusiastic personal trainer as he took loads of measurements, tested my strength by seeing how much I could chest/shoulder press, did an agility test running round cones, measured how high I could jump and how far I could run on the treadmill for 12 minutes. Safe to say I'm very unfit, I could only fast walk for 12 mins no hope of running but am stronger than I thought. Anyway I'm not sure I want to do the PT session again but I did it and feel good that I made myself go.

Thanks everyone, I've always thought I'm not the sort of person that goes to the gym and had just accepted being a bit frumpy but I'm going to try and change that and my mindset! Wish me luck!

I belong to a gym which for some reason locally has a reputation for having fit, gym bunny members. In reality there is a total mix of ages and sizes.
I have seen some pretty large people having pt sessions and only feel admiration they are there. I am a couple of stone overweight and honestly nobody takes any notice of other people. Go for it!

Just read your update! Well done you!

Amusing anecdote for you OP.

I joined a gym and had the same induction session as you, whereupon I presented my food diary. I'd been honest and not hidden the bad foods, but I was quite happy with my proper breakfast of scrambled eggs on muffins a few days that week.

However my PT clearly hadn't heard of breakfast muffins, and I then spent ages desperately, and increasingly unbelievably, trying to convince her I wasn't eating "cupcake" type sweet muffins (with eggs?!) for breakfast. She never believed me!

But she did still write me a good programme and didn't snigger at my morbidly obese weight...

@buzz haha I can just imagine them raising an eyebrow at chocolate chip muffins with eggs for breakfast! Thank god I didn't need to do a food diary, that's the next thing to seriously look at!