Kids and juggling a career

[Lioncub12]

I have a 5 month old Son and we are planning to have another baby when he's around 2.

Is it normal to be completely terrified about how I'm going to cope with two? I'm really anxious about it and my brain doesn't seem to register how I'm going to be able to manage! Women all over the world seem to manage just fine, and I feel like I'm the only one who won't be able to do it ☹️

What I'm worried about most is juggling a career with two. How do you working superhumans do it?! Moms make it look so easy.

How do you run round after a toddler when you're pregnant? Are the mornings absolutely insain getting everybody ready? Are you always late to work? It all seems alien to me! 😔🤪

We have just over a 2 year gap. They're the best of friends and play with the same stuff. The first 2 years were tough- sleep deprivation is tough but its doable, I'm glad we did it the way we did and once the baby stage is done I wouldn't want to go back and do it all again- I have friends with 5 or 6 year olds starting again with a new baby- that looks hard work- things have changed so they have to learn again, the older one has after school activities and interests that are hard to drag a baby round to.
Each to their own, but we love the age gap and whatever the gap you will adapt and do it x

How old are you and your DH? I agree with others that it makes much more sense to become established in your chosen career (work at least one year) before having another child if a career is important to you. It will be much harder to start a career from zero with two small kids and more likely than not you will end up staying home for several years (which is ok if that is your choice, but be careful about falling into this role because you don't have an other options and DH's career is always taking precedence over yours).

Unless your DH is 50+ and is worried about not living to see his kids grow up, I don't see why his age should trump your need to build a career

Yes, how old are you and DH?

I have a 5 yo and a 1yo and work four days a week, term time only. I found going from one to two DC much harder than I anticipated to be honest. I love them both dearly but the last 12 months have been tough. It doesn't help that the 1yo is a terrible sleeper.
I adore my job so although it's exhausting trying to juggle work/kids/home etc it's worth it. I wouldn't want to be a SAHM. I think I would find being at home full time more draining actually. DH works long hours and is away 1-2 nights a week, which he hates but it's non-negotiable. When he's away the mornings are very stressful but you just manage, no choice really.

I remember with DD thinking everything seemed to get so much easier when she was 3yo. So although I know I shouldn't wish my life away, I am looking forward to getting to that stage.

I'm 27 and he is 49. Establishing my career first makes much more sense. My DH has an extremely well paid job so it is very doubtful he would go part time. He doesn't do too much housework although I prefer to do it so I know it's done right!

I think I was hell bent on having a small age gap so they can play together and be into the same things, and giving DH as much time with them as possible (yes I'm already thinking about his mortality - what can I say, I plan ahead lol) AND I have been mega broody since I gave birth 😂.

But he will have plenty of time with them so I'll stop fretting. I overthink everything.

Thank you for your help x

I used to think that. Then I had 4 dc and we had to be out the house by 7:15

You get organised and you just do it!

We have a 4 and 1 year old. Both DH and I work full-time in demanding career roles. Life is completely manic and we have very little down time. We are incredibly organised and have lists everywhere. We have a cleaner. It's manageable but sometimes I think I'm completely mad when I volunteer for village activities and PTA etc. I like being busy though, it's not for everyone.

I am pregnant with my second, my first will be almost 3 when the baby is born.
I was already panicking a bit but after reading this thread I am terrified 😔
I only work part time during term time and will have a year off on maternity.
Now I don’t think I can do it 😔