DDs 15 year old friend

[SpeedwellX]

DD has confided that her 15 year old friend is now having a sexual relationship with another 15 year old boy from her school. My gut feeling is to keep well out if it but DH seems to think we should let her parents know.

Would you keep quiet or say something? In the interests of clarity, we do know the girl's parents socially.

Keep out of it. My dd is the same age and seems to think lots of kids in her year are having sex, luckily she’s not interested in boys and is concentrating on her GCSE’s, I don’t really care what other teens are up too, I remember what I was up to at that age and I’m just please my dd doesn’t take after me 🤣

Help her make new friends?????

What? Why? A 15 year old experimenting with sex with another 15 year old is not unusual or a reason to encourage the end of a friendship.

Stay out of it, esp as you know they are well educated re safe sex.

I was having sex with my same aged boyfriend at 16. If my friend's parent had told my parents I would have been mortified!

I came on to say 'don't say anything!' But I can see that it's already been said!

I think your DD could be testing your reaction before she has sex with someone. You just need to be breezy and honest with her.

I was having sex at 15, if someone had told my mum I’d have been mortified! I’d definitely have been annoyed with my friend and wouldn’t trust her again. Not sure why your DH is sticking his nose in either, my DH would turn and walk out the room if my DD was talking about her friends sex life.

Absolutely keep out of it
2 15year olds having sex,hardly a shock

I started going out with my DP 13 years go when i was 15. One of their nosey neighbours butted in and told them he was coming round when my parents left and leaving before they came home. They knew he was. I would of been mortified if a parents friend went running to my mum and i sure as hell would of stopped talking to that friend aswell.

I think it depends if it is a proper relationship, if there is any peer pressure,either child is vulnerable, that they are sensible and knowledgeable,can access support and advice as needed. A conversation about making wise choices with your daughter might be something she would wish to share with her friend. Are they both in the same year or has one just turned 15 whilst the other is nearly 16? Discuss it with your daughter so you guage if she understands what a good relationship is as oppose to a toxic one. If anything worries you then you may need to decide if someone else should know based on any risks.

It’s none of your business, so I’d stay out of it. When I was 17 I started having sex with my 17-year boyfriend. His mum found out and phoned my mum. We had a family conference with both sets of parents and me and him to discuss this!! Absolutely mortifying. It ruined the relationships between everyone, except me and bf. We still had sex (probably not as safely as previously), as our parents decided we shouldn’t be allowed sleepovers or unsupervised time in each other’s bedrooms. Just awful behaviour from our parents

My Dd is almost 15
I know exactly who is having sex with who both at her school and the other local one where she has plenty of friends as she tells me. I also know of one girl who is pg (her mum does know and is dealing with it)
I try not to be too shocked as I want her to trust and confide in me

My close friend’s 15 yr old dd started having sex not soon after her 15th birthday. I know because dd told me. I’m not about to tell my friend though, because I value dd’s trust too much. I did point out to dd that her friend isn’t legal yet, unlikely to be emotionally mature enough, (I know for a fact she has a shocking relationship with her father 🤷🏼‍♀️) and runs a high risk of getting pregnant if she isn’t sensible. Apart from that there’s nothing more for me to say.

My super well informed DD and her boyfriend seemed to have missed the message that any sex without a condom is unsafe even if he withdraws. So maybe bring that up as a reminder.

Keep well out of it.

There may be a time in the future when your dd needs to confide in you again, possibly about herself, and she needs to have complete faith and trust in you.

keep out of it
But I wouldn't rely on your daugter "doing a lot on safe sex at school" to not have a conversation with he about it - you should still have the conversation(s) with her, so that she knows it's something she can discuss with you.

None of your business. Two 15 year olds whilst not ideal is not a safeguarding issue either plus perhaps the mum knows ... I knew exactly what my dd was doing, I wasn't stupid, but she was mature enough to decide for herself

Your DD could be talking about herself to test your reaction
this....

Chances are your daughter is/will soon be having sex too and is just testing the water to see what your reaction is like...

And now she knows that whilst mum might be sensible, dad is likely to have a shit fit at the idea that his little girl has grown up.

Don't tell the parents - it's not your role.

Instead consider why your daughter is sharing this with you. She maybe curious, confused or even scared about the prospect of sex and is consciously or unconsciously telling you this because she wants to talk or gauge parental reaction/support.

DD used to tell stuff like this all the time. I never felt it was my responsibility to talk to the parents - not that I knew them anyway.

DD has done a lot at school on safe sex recently. I know that she and friends are all up to speed on this issue.

I suggested you have the conversation so you can check that knowledge is being put into practice and so you can gauge how your daughter is feeling (either for herself or her friend), and so if there are problems she knows she can come back to you.

I might be strange but while I chat to my DDs all the time and encourage them to chat about anything,I do try and discourage too much detail about what their friends are doing