Christmas

[Paddington68]

In laws arriving in early December and staying until New Year is nothing new and I've mentioned it before here. Thanks for the tips of using a leg of lamb as a murder weapon.

This year DP's aunt is staying at a hotel nearby, she lives in another country, and knows nobody near where we live. We have not invited her to stay at hotel or indeed do anything with us. Christmas is a very busy time for us and we have plans already.

DP mother today mentions - IN PASSING - that aunt is arriving at hotel on 23rd and staying until 27th. And the hotel is fully booked for Christmas lunch. She will have no transport.

AIBU to think it would have been nice to be asked about what is clearly going to be another person at our table for Christmas?
In our small two bedroomed flat etc.

It would have been nice to have been asked, but really can't believe you wouldn't have extended an invite to a relative who was close by and was spending Christmas alone.

MIL swears she has not asked her, but knows the exact dates and location of her stay, and the fact she has no transport?

YANBU. MIL has well and truly invited her. I would just play dumb. Ask MIL what the purpose if the hotel stay is, seeing as she knows nobody in the area. She has no transport? No transport for what exactly?

Tell you what, send her here. One extra for Christmas dinner won’t even be noticed. We can even give her a bed.

I understand why you’re annoyed at not being asked, I would be too. But you’re going to have to invite her so probably best to just accept it. However do not agree to be running her about. If she wants to come she sorts out a taxi to and from (or let mil do it)

Many thanks for your comments

My question would be why has she booked herself into a hotel so close to christmas where she knows no one? So rude of her.

My AIBU was purely about her inviting herself.
I obviously wouldn't expect her to sit in a hotel room for a week in an area where she knows no one, and where she can't just pop on a bis or tube to get anywhere. She is staying in an out of London hotel.
However this will impact on my Christmas.
Five adults in a car rather than 4.
We live in a small London flat - we don't have a dining table that 5 can sit around.
Plans have already been made, so she will have to be consulted about these by my accommodating family.
So I feel my Christmas has been hijacked by this person and my hand has been completely forced.

But people seem to think I am being ungenerous. so I will bow to Mumsnet.

Oh wow no this is rude AF and it would make me dig my heels in HARD!

Act oblivious to their intent OP. "Dear Aunt will be in a hotel room all christmas with no transport or xmas lunch." "That seems like an odd choice to have made! Oh well, how about these slippers for FIL?" Don't engage, don't make any offers, force her to actually bring up the issue of an invitation and then ask why on earth MIL thought it would be alright to invite someone to your house without asking first. Wow you would not be unreasonable to ignore the whole thing.