AIBU to be exhausted and expect a little bit of sympathy?

[HulaHoop2012]

I’m a sahm and dh’s usual hours are long and the last two weeks have been spent working away on and off. He returned last night and told me he is now away again until Friday. It tipped me over the edge and couldn’t understand why I burst into tears.

We’ve two children 7 and 1 and usually we have a fairly good routine and I don’t mind dh being away and we are all used to it.

However the last two weeks have been the worst ever, dd 7 has tonsillitis that just wont shift she has honestly been so unwell.
Ds1 has decided that he will not sleep and has been up at least twice every single night.
Throw in the worst head cold that feels like my eyes are going to pop out, I’m just at them end of my tether. Nobody is getting looked after properly we are just getting though the days.
The vague thought of dh being home was the one thing I was clinging onto.

All I wanted was a bit of sympathy.

Not sure what I want from this post but sometimes it’s bloody hard.

Huge amount of respect for working mums, how you manage this and get to work is beyond me.

My husband often works away, a sudden change when you were half thinking of company, maybe someone to offer you a cup of tea can really pull the rug out from under you.

I know what it's like. It's not even any help it's just the presence of someone most of the time. Don't sweat the giving up, embrace it. Order some easy to cook meals and ice lollies for the tonsillitis and all the cold relief for you, stick on movies read all the books and hopefully a corner will be turned.
Sympathy and tea from me, even if it's only virtual.

Sometimes it is bloody hard.

Do the bare minimum to survive until Friday and make it clear to your DH that you need to recover on the weekend.

Sorry OP

Is he genuinely working or using work as an excuse to leave the parenting to you?

Does he need to travel so much?

He’s probably getting lots of downtime in the evenings and a full night’s sleep every night.

What’s he like when he’s at home? Can you leave the kids with him for a day/weekend to show how difficult it is?

Freedom that’s it exactly, the presence of having someone else there. Thanks for the cuppa 😘

Havana, unfortunately at the moment he needs to travel. I do feel that he gets more rest then I do and although living in hotel rooms is not ideal at least he sleeps!!! I would love one night in a hotel in my own.

He’s usually really good and picks up a lot of the slack at the weekends, I can’t fault him. It’s just sometimes it’s the little things and having him here to ponder things with.

It’s also things like dd has had tonsillitis for over a week, she’s on penicillin that’s a fight to get into her, she’s literally gagging and it has to be done 4 times a day. She mouth sores and ulcers and she’s just fed up. I’m trying to get another drs appointment for this afternoon.

But I have got a Tesco delivery coming with a vast amount of cold and flu meds, teething stuff for this toddler in The hope he might sleep.

Thank you ladies for your kind words 😘

Aww I really feel for you. Last week my DH was away Mon-Fri and has been away a few weeks before that and a few days this week. It's all ok when everyone is well but we've all had coughs and colds too. Last week I took 2 days off work which I've never done for myself in such a long time but I was just so loaded I could hardly breathe plus sneezing everywhere yet still had to get up get kids out to school in freezing cold, clean house, walk dog do shopping etc. Plus take my son to 2 football matches in freezing cold and watch him as my DH usually does that. My parents are elderly and my mum really ill so no one to help. This week my DS (15) has got the cold/flu and he's got his exams at school so I really feel for him but he has to go in. My DD (12) had it the week before and had a week in her bed and I had to work from home. It's just a constant juggling act. Load yourself up with painkillers & whatever cold & flu stuff you can get and go easy on yourself it will eventually pass but its not much fun. Easy dinners does no one any harm for a few days or so and if there's anyone to help do let them. Hope you feel better really soon its just this time of year is rubbish - sending hugs and tea xxx

Bless you that does sound hard. Can you arrange for you to get a night off soon? Something to look forward to? We talked about sending me to a hotel for a night when DD2 was a baby and never slept. I was a woman on the edge. We never did get round to it, but the idea of it was so nice!!

Do you have any family or friends who might take the 1yo for a few hours? I am a single working parent, and it's properly hard when my daughter or I are sick. I've asked my mum for a day of babysitting my daughter for me over the Christmas holidays. All I want is to have a nice solo bath, get into a clean bed with all the snacks and read a book. I dream of it I would, and have, helped a friend out so they can have a few hours off in similar circs. You'll feel recharged after. If not, take it easy - no mum guilt allowed (I know it's hard not to feel guilty). Ease up on screen time limits, easy dinners etc.