Meet the Other Phone. Flexible and made to last.

Meet the Other Phone.
Flexible and made to last.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Passive aggressive or not ? Email etiquette ?

17 replies

Majorcollywobble · 18/11/2019 18:11

Hypothetical situation - you are sitting 10 feet from your boss who happens to be in the same office .
You receive an email from them advising you that you will be required to work the next day‘s shift at a different office four miles away . Are you being unreasonable to ask why not mention it to you direct and then follow up with the email to confirm ?

OP posts:
Mintjulia · 18/11/2019 18:12

Is she sending the same kind of emails to lots of different people?

PurpleDaisies · 18/11/2019 18:13

It’s so there’s a record of it. I wouldn’t worry too much. This is pretty standard.

TheMobileSiteMadeMeSignup · 18/11/2019 18:17

I would expect a manager to come over, inform/ask first then follow up with email so that details such as start and end times, travel details etc are in writing.

Majorcollywobble · 18/11/2019 18:19

@Mintjulia
It was to a specific person for a specific shift change and they were in the same room .

OP posts:
73Sunglasslover · 18/11/2019 18:31

I sometimes email things I could say so there's a record - and for something like this it also means you can be totally sure you've give the person the right address. I don't think it's necessarily passive aggressive. That said, if I email someone who's sitting next to me I also tell them why.

Beveren · 18/11/2019 18:39

Depends, really. The other person might be busy so that the boss thinks it's better to email rather than interrupt them. Or they might need a written record.

Mothership4two · 18/11/2019 18:44

I would find it strange OP. If they want/need a written record, I would still expect them to talk to me first.

WoollyMollyMonkey · 18/11/2019 18:45

I had that with a new boss, and she sat less than 6ft away from me. Rather than turn her head and ask me a question, she’d email me. Arsehole. I eventually changed jobs, which is probably what she wanted.

lljkk · 18/11/2019 18:56

I like emails, so not PA. Is 4 miles distance a hardship for you, OP?

Petrichor11 · 18/11/2019 19:12

I would expect my boss to speak to me first then follow up with an email with details, unless it’s the norm to get a days notice that you’re working in a different location

Shuckle · 18/11/2019 19:15

I would also expect to be spoken to "informally" in person and then followed up with the email in my office with my manager - but it may well be in this situation that the manager is trying to cover their back and ensure that all communication and instructions are in writing? Perhaps the manager fears giving the heads up verbally and then the employee claims the follow up email is different in tone or instruction? I wouldn't say it's passive aggressive, but different offices would have different etiquettes so it's hard to say

Haffdonga · 18/11/2019 19:21

Weird.

If I'm the boss in this situation I always say something informal first.
Oh Major, I'm just sending you an email about a shift change, would you have a look?

CAG12 · 18/11/2019 19:22

I would have spoken to you first but you need the email to confirm

Awaywiththepiskies · 18/11/2019 19:47

•It was to a specific person for a specific shift change and they were in the same room*

I send these kinds of emails all the time because then both of us have a record of it.

AliceLittle · 18/11/2019 19:50

I see nothing wrong with it. I don't have my email open all the time and I'd rather not be interrupted when concentrating so an email that I can read later is preferred.

mrsbyers · 18/11/2019 19:59

Sometimes when I’m trying to hammer through my to do list I do the same , coming over to speak to you may lead to a long discussion - this way job done

ArsenicNLace · 18/11/2019 20:07

I think it shows your boss is a bit gutless in all honesty.

I had a boss like this. She once spent all afternoon in our office typing away. At 10 to 4 she gets up and goes off to her own office. At about one minute to four (she finished at 4) we all got an email telling us we were all moving to a new location in a months time that she knew we would all object to.

She was on 2 weeks leave from that day and she had tasked each of the managers with various actions with regards to the move. The email was very long and she had clearly been typing it up while sat in our office but had waited to press send when she got back to her office.

Unfortunately (for her) she broke her ankle couple of days later and had to go off sick so we all went to her boss and outlined the reasons the location move was a bad idea idea. He agreed and we stayed put.

She was furious on her return. 'Why hadn't we spoken to her first before 'running' to her boss. We pointed out that she had deliberately sent an email as she walked out of the door prior to 2 weeks leave and had never at any point discussed it with any of us first.

She was an idiot and the only reason she wanted to move to a new location was because there were no bosses there and she felt she could hide. No thought that those of us who were the actual practitioners who wouldn't have the tools with which to carry out our role there and would spend disproportionate amount of time having to return to our original location to do our jobs!

New posts on this thread. Refresh page
Swipe left for the next trending thread