Enough socialisation/activities for baby/toddler???

[marshmellowed]

Had a comment made to me about ds not being very sociable (all because he cried at total strangers at a family event).
He’s nearly 2
8w-4m we did baby massage x1 a week
4m-21m a weekly music class
21-now 1-2 sessions a week at a play/sensory session at children’s centre

We also go out and to the park etc or see friends maybe once a month who have children and he has siblings who play with him ....
But I don’t ‘socialise’ him enough 😡

You do plenty.

I think it was just too many people he format know coming up to him and he’s generally happy and gets on well at his groups

*didn’t know

We did a grand total of fuck all baby groups. He went to nursery at 1.9, then started school at 2.9 (we're in Spain).
Otherwise we met friends in the park, in cafes, caught lots of buses where ds was frequently cooed over.
He's now 8yo and very social, if a little shy arriving to a roomful of people saying HELLO!!!! all at once.

You do plenty!
I work with children and many of them are growing up not being able to amuse themselves or use their imagination because they are taken out and about all the time and are constantly being amused and kept busy by parents who think they're missing out. Don't get me wrong- I understand that parents want to do all these things and give children as many fun times and experiences as they can- but they can do too much and that's where it goes wrong.

The person is probably embarrassed or offended that they made your toddler cry so they just want to “blame” you rather than thinking that maybe they’re not so good with kids or just admit to themselves that they’re a stranger to him and it’s normal! I wouldn’t worry

Babies nd young children learn from their parents. Unless you're sitting at home in total silence and not interacting with each other at all, he will be fine

Smile, nod and ignore? Blame teething? At this age kids don't have a filter, if they aren't in the mood or if someone isn't playing with them, then people won't get a good reaction. My DS is a similar age and likes people who get down on the floor playing with him, pretty much ignoring anyone else and shouting if he can't see me or DH. I don't think I know any toddlers who can sit or stand still for very long while adults chat, they all want to run about exploring or hide between mummy and daddy's legs. Actually my DS has also really taken against a dad at one very big playgroup for no reason I can work out; he stares, points and grumbles rudely until I move him away (obviously he won't ever be on his own with this man, this has happened 3 times now), so it could have been worse!

We do 4-5 groups per week (varies a little) plus some playground or park trips, so a little more than you do, but I think one per week is enough for socialisation. I'm doing more just to normalise the 5-morning routine as pre-nursery prep and because he likes watching and playing with other kids. Those other kids mostly ignore him or steal toys he's playing with, but luckily he's chilled about that.

I only ever did baby classes with my eldest ( he is 16 now), with the others I just couldn't fit them in to our routine. We don't have a TV and they all just got on with making up games at home. We often did lots of crafty messy play at home. All of my children are super shy in public but quietly confident in the classroom.
If we were with company who they didn't know or remember they would be clingy and super fussy which was often frustrating but with friends and family they were like different people.
Everybody's temperament is different and nobody should expect little children to be smiley and happy all the time

My DS will talk to anyone, has always been the same. No filter. Super confident. Would approach any stranger and just start chatting.

My DD is 2. She’s super shy. She won’t even look at new people half the time and takes a long tine to warm up to them. She got dragged to all the groups with her big brother, we probably go to a play date or meet friends pretty much every day, she hangs out with her brother and with neighbors kids almost every afternoon and she just started 2 sessions a week at nursery, which she loves. Some kids are just shy around strangers. Especially in an overwhelming environment like a party