AIBU to even consider this?

[Vilanelle]

Some details changed as could be identifying.

Say you were 11 weeks pregnant with first baby, scan due thursday but BIL is a sonographer and has their ultrasound machine at home and offers a sneak peak...

Would you?

DP says yes.

I say he isn't at all qualified in this department (pregnancy) and could offer me no reassurance if something didn't look right.

YANBU - don't do it, wait for scan

YABU - Do it!

Is DP coming to 12 week scan? If not that's on him, he needed to have sorted it.
Don't do it. If there's even a hint of something not being right you'll be in a really difficult predicament.

I've told dp firmly and we have had a bit of an argument over it. I said I told his brother weeks ago I wouldn't want to so am annoyed that he's offered and put me in the position where I have to let dp down.

Ffs feeling very pissed off! Sulky twat

Yes dp is coming to 12 week scan x

If something was wrong it would be an awful moment to experience for everyone involved. Just be patient, it will be worth the wait

No-one can scan your uterus without your permission. Just say no.

Your DP sounds like a peach 💐.

The people who are saying ultrasound is without any risk need to read the latest AGNIR export or NHS guidance. A recent study using mice has shown some minor damage to the nervous system but the research isn’t adequate to extrapolate that to in uterine damage.
Advice is less scans are better but when used within guidance they are considered safe.
I’d not be having ad hoc scans.

I'm sorry no I wouldn't.
What if it was bad news and no heartbeat could be found (god forbid this happens). You would have to wait until your official scan to have it confirmed and then a plan of action because most trusts will not undertake emergency scans or doppler appointments below 20 weeks.
That's awful news to live with for any period of time no matter how short.

He only has another week to wait ffs. Tell him to grow up. Yanbu.

Am I the only one that would be uncomfortable having my bil rubbing the ultrasound over my pregnant belly? I’m sure he’s very nice, but that’s a bit too close to home for me.

Well I'd be insisting I tucked the tissue down my own trousers, but I don't really think an ultrasound of a stomach is gonna be a turn on

Another person who really wants to know why your BIL has an ultrasound machine at home. Is it custom and practice to take it home?

Also- don't do it, just wait.

The 12 week scan is a dating scan, the abnormalities scan is at 20 weeks. There is limited benefit from your BIL doing a prescan, but little harm done either.

FWIW the premiums for twins insurance for health professionals is very expensive. From which I have always assumed that the insurance companies expect there has been a sneaky peak.

Congratulations on your pregnancy.

No, no, no - why is he even offering?

You haven't explained why bil has a scanner at home...

I don't know why he has a scanner at home, all I know is that he doesn't have it at home often, and please remember some details have been changed.

Lol at the suspicions he is getting his kicks from doing it, he is gay so that thought hadn't crossed my mind.

I have said no but thank you for reassuring me I did the right thing.

Nothing to do with getting kicks, but all knods of boundaries crossed. Totally inappropriate both personally and medically.

Your DP sounds a bit of an idiot.

And he needs to get the memo that nobody argues with a pregnant woman over aspects of HER care when SHE is pregnant and it's HER body. Nothing about anything to do with pregnancy care is any of his business whatsoever and his job is to support you - only.

Knods? Kinds!

Lol at the suspicions he is getting his kicks from doing it, he is gay so that thought hadn't crossed my mind.

It was nothing to do with him, but just a feeling of a bit too close for comfort.

Why does your BIL have "his" ultrasound machine at home?

Yes why? and more to the point what does he normally scan for is it to do with engineering purposes or what? These machines are very expensive for medical purposes so why does he have it and whats he use it for?.

Ultrasound is just a high frequency sound wave normally harmless BUT and this is the but do we know what strenght of sound the transducer emits and frequency?

Thats the reall concern!.

This from wikipedia as well.

Diagnostic ultrasound studies of the fetus are generally considered to be safe during pregnancy. This diagnostic procedure should be performed only when there is a valid medical indication, and the lowest possible ultrasonic exposure setting should be used to gain the necessary diagnostic information under the "as low as reasonably practicable" or ALARP principle.

However, medical ultrasonography should not be performed without a medical indication to perform it. To do otherwise would be to perform unnecessary health care to patients, which bring unwarranted costs and may lead to other testing. Overuse of ultrasonography is sometimes as routine as screening for deep vein thrombosis after orthopedic surgeries in patients who are not at heightened risk for having that condition.[76]

Similarly, although there is no evidence ultrasound could be harmful for the fetus, medical authorities typically strongly discourage the promotion, selling, or leasing of ultrasound equipment for making "keepsake fetal videos

Absolutely not!
Ultrasounds are not harmless and if used incorrectly can harm an early pregnancy. My husband is qualified to scan and refused to do it for that reason. We waited for the official scan, just not worth the risk. Especially if he’s not qualified in pregnancy scans.

@Vilanelle

Some details have been changed? So he doesn't have his ultrasound equipment at home?

Some details have been changed

Is he a vet? 😁

He's a vet and the ultrasound machine is at his veterinary practice