To feel like I can't go anymore

[Hurthal]

I do Parkrun every Saturday and have done for the last 18 months.

Last week I saw my (abusive, controlling) Ex partner there, he was in the first timers brief.

We split 8 years ago, I'm happily married now. I lost a lot of weight since then so I don't know if he'd even recognised me.

I've had nothing but nightmares all week, and I'm sweating and feeling crap now.

I've told DH I don't want to go (there's no other PR close) but he says I have nothing to hide away for and it's my life I'm allowed to live.

Am I being ridiculous to be so affected all these years later?

Good for you OP!

I did see Ex, he didn't see me, but I'll practice my best 'look through him' ' stare incase he's there again next week.

I don’t suppose there’s any chance the fucker previously clocked you jogging about and decided to crap all over your parade by joining up?

Well done, OP. That's brilliant!

In your place, I'd never acknowledge him. If he spoke to me as if he knew me, I'd just say, "Sorry - I have absolutely no idea who you are" and move away sharpish.

Well done OP, be bloody proud of yourself!

That can't have been easy OP. You should be so proud of yourself.

I remember seeing a friend who had ghosted me a few years ago and I felt sick as I couldn't avoid her. I can't imagine how I would have reacted had it been an abusive ex. Well done.

You’ve done the hardest bit OP by going back and seeing him. You are strong. Keep going. His is nothing