AIBU to think...

[bluebella4]

...the teenage years are going to be hell? He's only 11 and it's started.. How the heck do you get through it???!!!

I've had so many 'what tha f...' this week.... It's bloody draining.

Ha! 11yo DD the same today. Her first real complete and utter meltdown at me. it was bloody awful and God knows how we are all going to cope

2 sons in their teenage years are an absolute dream so far. My 14yr old daughter on the other hand has put us through hell these past 2 years. So defiant and hell bent on trying to do whatever she wants!

How did you manage it with.the boys? People i apeak too say boys are dream compared to girls 🤔 I have 4 boys...

The boys just seem happy and chilled within their friendship groups and also know exactly what they want to do career wise, so have concentrated at school. Also not been too interested in having girlfriends.
My daughter goes from one friendship group to the next, isn’t overly sporty and not interested in doing anything other than social media and having a boyfriend.
We haven’t treated them any differently either, I just think it’s her personality tbh I just wish I could move on 5 years for it to all calm down with her.
I also have a 9yr old daughter too and am hoping she doesn’t follow suit with her sister.
It’s an awful thing to say and wish for, but to me, I would swap 4 boys over 2 of each!
My boys also share a room and always have done, so are actually really close in their relationship. Maybe that’s been the saving grace 🤷‍♀️.

DD7 hasn't even come out of her toddler tantrums yet so I'm expecting a smooth transition in to teenage stuff 😭

deep breaths, take it one day at a time. pick your battles!
remember the mn mantra "this too shall pass"

He's a great wee lad, he gets on with everyone in the home and has a few good friends. He's not academically focused but very much a hard worker. No issues at school. Hes the one doing odd jobs about the school for the teachers or supporting the P.1 who is scared or goes to the child that has no one to play with. He has goals and very much will achieve. It's more the white lies, answering back and hitting out. Suppose it is the norm for his age but flip me it's everyday!

How do you choose your battles? How do you decide if he's doing something wrong that it will stick or just let it go?

I helped bring up my exH DD from the age of 9, she lived full time with us from 15. Our DD was 4 when her big sister moved in, so I did the teen thing again with her. ExH moved out when DD was 8. I then met DP and had DD and DS. They are both now teens! DD2 is the one who will most likely break me! She is too much like me!

I have no advice other than to pick your battles!

really I think you have to experience a few clashes before you find your baseline acceptable teen behaviour.
be consistent, firm but friendly. a lot of the time you'll feel like you're giving so much and getting nothing back, but keep at it.

he sounds like a decent lad, so that's something to be thankful for/proud of! :)

Be firm, be consistent and use all the support you have. My DD is 16 and the last few years have been really hard. Apparently boys are easier so fingers crossed.

TheBigFatMarmaid my goodness well done you! I'm sure that was difficult. I think that's the reason I wasn't blessed with a girl (possibly could have been like me) my poor husband would pack up an leave lol 😂😂

Thank you Janaih! It's ain't half brutal tho

Yup oldest ds in 11, he is a fucking nightmare. Meltdowns about absolutely everything.

We've found year 8 hell on earth. 13.5 now and much better. Im sure we'll have hell again before the teen years are over,!

Just need to learn to let small things go and pick your battles.

I hate the teenage years. I have a 14 year old dd and just feel like she hates me and I can't ever do anything right and that absolutely everything wrong in her life is my fault!
I have a 7 year old ds and I'm hoping that he'll be a dream when he hits his teenage years (fingers crossed!!)

My 10yo has started having regular flip outs where he goes crazy. It's usually something annoying that his younger brother has done, which he should just walk away from. Instead he cries hysterically, throws things, stomps into his bedroom where he slams the door and proceeds to chuck stuff around in there. Im at my wits end .

When I say hitting out, it's not at me or his dad. It's like he will stick his foot out and trip his brothers. Or if he's walking past he'll flick his hand out to hit them. He thinks it's bloody hilarious!

I'm more than happy if he stomps off to his room. He'll jus play lego or read.

This evening just came to head where he told a lie. We have spoke about lies over and over and over. My head is about to burst!!
Answering back is were we clash because I react to it. So I think this is were I need to stop and have a chat with myself. Ideas on how are welcome 😀