Hairdresser AIBU would this bother you?

[Celestia7]

I’ve been going to the same salon for over three years but the last few times I’ve found my stylist to be quite sloppy missing quite large chunks of hair when cutting. You shouldn’t have to take scissors to your own hair after coming away from the salon so I asked around for recommendations.

Three of my friends use the same hairdresser and rave about how good she is so I booked in with her.

She’s mobile but actually charges more than the previous salon I went to, plus she now charges me a extra £5 for Petrol despite being mobile, she lives less than 10 minutes away.

Anyway I’ve used her three times now and she’s done a good enough job.

However she constantly talks about the fact she’s a struggling single mum. Every conversation is “I’m so poor”

I’m not exaggerating but everything she or I say gets turned around into I’m so poor, money is so tight, I have no money, your so lucky to have or do x y & z. I can’t afford this that or the other.

She’s very vocal about the fact she lives in a small 2 bed flat and has 4 DC and how hard it is and how annoyed she is at the housing association for not moving her. Fair enough I can understand that’s got to be very hard for her.

She was here the day before last and was asking lots of questions about our house and how many bedrooms. She said on a number of occasions through the appointment at just how unfair life is as we have a bigger house than we need and she’s so overcrowded.

I find it just so incredibly uncomfortable and just don’t know what to say.

I have my hair coloured and cut so she’s here for a while. I’m not sure wether to find another salon as I find it so awkward but then I would feel guilty about not giving her the custom.

I’ve asked one of my friends if the hairdresser is the same with her and she apparently doesn’t make the personal comments towards my friend but she does mention constantly how poor she is and slating the housing association. My friend said she just nods and agrees.

I usually pre book my next appointment but I haven’t this time round as I’m not sure I want to use her again but she’s now messaging asking to book in for my next appointment.

Would this bother you?

It would. I find it stressful getting my haircut, the chat doesn't need to add to that. Paying extra for petrol would annoy me too.

Yeah, it would annoy me. I hate listening to people complaining about money problems. Have a Google and see if you can find a different salon to visit. Don't feel bad about her. Her problems are not your problem to deal with.

Honestly? I’d move on

I have a good 2 hours with my hairdresser talking about every topic under the sun and having a bit of a laugh. Life’s too short and there are loads of great hairdressers around

I'd find someone else.

Yes I would be really annoyed at that, you don’t need to be made uncomfortable in your own home.
If she was cheap and did an excellent job I would probably put up with it. However I don’t get the impression that mid true from what you have written so I should look elsewhere.

I'd find somebody else too.
Getting your hair done should be a treat and give you some downtime. You shouldn't have to feel stressed out. Especially in your own home.

I’ve actually managed to put off someone making friends with me for similar reasons. She met me when I was on a downer financially and I seemed to be always complaining about how expensive everything was and how I couldn’t afford any luxuries or meals out or holidays etc etc. She, on the other hand, was very comfortably off.

I could hear all these things coming out of my mouth and I couldn’t seem to stop them but I could see / imagine how uncomfortable it made her feel. I never said it was unfair or try to compare my life to hers though - I just moaned a lot!

I don’t think you are being unreasonable at all. Nor do I think my almost-friend was unreasonable for backing away from me. I learned my lesson!

I would find someone else. very unprofessional of her. Dont feel guilty, she will lose other customers this way.

She’s mobile but actually charges more than the previous salon I went to, plus she now charges me a extra £5 for Petrol despite being mobile, she lives less than 10 minutes away.

^For this alone I would ditch her. Also she is guilt tripping you in the hope you’ll pay her more. Get rid of her, she sounds awful.

Definitely move on! You've been unlucky but keep trying to find a good hairdresser. Getting your hair cut and coloured is expensive and supposed to leave you feeling good about yourself. You don't owe this woman any loyalty.

I’d change too. I think it would be better to try a few salons until you find one you like. I realise that takes effort esp with colourists. But.... it means your colour chart is available even if a particular hairdresser leaves/is sick and if you do have any problems you could just ask for a different stylist or talk to a manager.

I tried a mobile hairdresser once. She usually worked in a salon I went to but offered to come to my home. She was very nice but I still found her being in my house very strange.

I couldn't be doing with this. I certainly wouldn't feel this uncomfortable in my own home if I had a choice. Don't think twice about it OP.

However, this bit, She’s very vocal about the fact she lives in a small 2 bed flat and has 4 DC and how hard it is - in her position I doubt I could think of anything else.

She’s trying to make you feel guilty, so you give her a big tip. It’s pathetic, but I’ve worked with people who do the poor me, to manipulate those around them. Change hairdressers. I don’t get much time to get my hair done, as I’m very busy, so I love to be able to relax and not have to worry about what I should be doing. I’d be seriously pissed of cat that level of manipulation.

Maybe try one of the chain salons?.They will be more expensive but Stylists are more highly trained, and it would be difficult to imagine that you would end up tweaking your hair when you got home TBH! Also can you go online and see reviews of various hairdressers? Sometimes a more local one can be of a high standard too. YANBU BTW .Hairdressers are coming to do a job for you ,not comment on how many bedrooms you have FFS!

Fuck that, why would you pay money to be moaned at! Text her back and say "Hi Mary, no thanks, I've decided to go back to a salon, getting my hair done is a bit of a treat and decided I missed getting out of the house and going to a salon for it. Thank you though"

Stop using her

Just find someone else?

Just tell her you've decided to go back to a salon and leave it there.

That’s very unprofessional of her. I’d tell her that I prefer silence when cutting my hair and if she continued to moan following your request, I’d ditch her.

Cost wise, if she’s a good hairdresser, I’d expect her to charge a fee equivalent to the salon as you’re paying for her skills and expertise and a 1:1 service. She’s not wandering off to see to other clients whilst in your home.

Having your haircut is supposed to be a relaxing time for you. Not having to listen to your hairdresser moaning for the duration.

Very unprofessional of her. I would find somewhere else personally.

If you are thinking of changing anyway I suppose you could give her one more appointment and say something like "it's very offputting for clients to have this sort of conversation. It makes me feel uncomfortable in my own home. Can't we talk about something else?"

Find another hairdresser! Shop around until you find one that does a good job and suits you. Screw fake loyalty!

My hairdresser is great. He’s good value. I go to him btw. But he’s just around the corner. We have a good laugh. He has told me about his life but I’d never expect him to offload onto me. That’s really unprofessional. You see someone to do your hair to make yourself feel good, not to be a therapist, who you are additionally paying to do a lousy job.