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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Anniversary present

12 replies

Babymamma192 · 09/11/2019 15:00

Not sure if I'm right or if I'm just hormonal and moody!

So long story short my ex best friend married my brother in law, they got engaged after about a month of dating....kind of stole our thunder because we'd only got engaged the month before and then they got married 5 weeks after us anyway it was our two year anniversary a few months ago and they gave us a card and a dvd that my husband already has and it looks like a second hand one anyway.

My husband decided to pay for them to go to a really nice restaurant that is quite expensive.....he said he wanted to get them something where they'd be able to go out and spend time together....theyve got a one year old and they always leave DC with my in laws and go out all the time.
We've got a 8 month old and we hardly ever go out anymore and I'm stuck at home still on maternity leave and don't get to go out much just the two of us......aibu to be a little bit annoyed about it all? Or am I just being horrible?

OP posts:
AnneLovesGilbert · 09/11/2019 15:02

I never buy anyone but my husband an anniversary present. If money is tight then he’s BVU to splash what you have on them instead of doing something nice yourselves.

The thunder stealing etc isn’t relevant.

AmIThough · 09/11/2019 15:11

He should be allowed to buy a nice gift for his brother (unless money is tight as PP said).

I think you're just pissed off because she's your ex best friend and they clearly made no effort, but you can be the bigger people here.

I don't think you should take it out on DH.

Baileyscheesecake · 09/11/2019 15:16

What did your husband do for your anniversary? If it was something comparable fair enough but I would be pretty pissed off if I were in your shoes.

Babymamma192 · 09/11/2019 15:25

For our anniversary we had a Marks and Spencers meal deal thing at home 😂🙄 and then the next day we went out for a Sunday dinner with the baby. We thought about booking a night away in a hotel or something but decided against it as it was a bit expensive......his brother an wife had a night away for theirs tho an then came back and had a lovely meal out on us 🤔
I don't want to take it out on my DH because I know he was just wanting to give them something nice but I can't help being a bit annoyed. Also money is kind of tight at the moment because the last 3 months of my maternity leave is unpaid....due to go back soon.

OP posts:
ToelessPobble · 09/11/2019 15:26

I have sympathy on regards to not wanting to spend so much, especially if you do not get to go out as much as they do. But...stole your thunder because they dates to get engaged before you were married and marry five weeks after you? Grow up.

ToelessPobble · 09/11/2019 15:27

*dared to

Longblondeandblueeyes · 09/11/2019 15:31

Yeah, that's ridiculous. Why the hell are you paying for their meal? Bonkers.

Honeybee85 · 09/11/2019 15:35

I understand how you feel OP, if you didn’t get a special celebration of your own anniversary why would you be part of paying for another couple’s luxury anniversary celebration?
I think I would also be like ConfusedHmm in your position.

Lana08 · 09/11/2019 15:40

So your DH got you a marks and Spencer’s meal deal but gifted his brother a meal at an expensive restaurant. If you have an issue with that, your issue is with your DH not the couple.

I have never bought my sisters a anniversary present or nor have the bought me one. I get my DH one and he gets me one. Obviously not if we were struggling for money. It’s our anniversary. I wouldn’t even expect other people to remember the date to be honest.

hazell42 · 09/11/2019 15:59

You husband is being ridiculous
So are you
I doubt very much that they got engaged/married/had a child to piss you off.
No one can steal your thunder by getting married after you.
Tell your husband to take you out, seeing as how he is so bloody considerate.
Or leave him at home and go out with your "friend'

Iamnotagoddess · 09/11/2019 16:02

Is she your ex best friend because of the thunder stealing.

This oozes massive resentment and jealously towards them..

AlwaysCheddar · 09/11/2019 16:09

Your dh is a dick for doing this.

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