Fallen out with my mum.

[jazhunt]

Hey everyone.
So about some time now, when I was pregnant with my boy, I had a baby shower where I invited 20+ people.
The week leading up to this, my mum wa a behaving very difficult, she announced on FB the name of my child when the other side of the family didn't know it yet, when asked to take it down she kicked off. Then once we sorted that, she was making 0 attempt sorting my baby shower out, and everytime I asked she told me to stop going on. So my partner was very good and baked the cakes and got people together to decorate and made it look amazing. She was going to turn up with some sausage rolls and a couple of balloons on the way here. She made a cake and because she put the name on the cake, I asked her to remove it as she again took a picture and put it on FB, she threw the cake on the floor and took a picture whilst giving me a load of abuse. She then led rmy partner, who may I add had no involvement with any of what was going on and was keeping our of it, abusive and threatening messages.

She turned up at the baby shower 20 mins before all my friends got there and completely ignored me. I tried to be civil and ask her to have a chat with me upstairs and she kicked off, I was heavily pregnant and had been in and out of hospital all week with high blood pressure and low fetal movement. She had me pinned against the sink pointing and shouting in my face. It become enough and for the sake of the baby's health. I had to ask her to leave. Which she didn't do nicely. After that I expected her to turn up at my house wanting to sort it out, instead i sent her a message explaining why I was upset and that I wanted to sort it out. She text back telling me to message her when I had grown up. It was so upsetting. She then went on to turn my brothers and sisters against me and as pathetic as it is got everyone ti block and delete me in Facebook. She has gone on to publish a poem about me and its pretty nasty. Am I being u reasonable still not seeing her. She's been a right nightmare my whole life and I have put up with a lot of shit from her.
But with this situation am I over reacting?

She threw a cake on the floor.
She pinned you against the sink and shouted at you.
She upset you when you were pregnant and ill.
She ignored you for four years.
She spoilt your party with deliberate manipulation and bad behaviour.
She undermined your requests about the baby's name.

This is not a series of accidents. Your M is a very bad woman and you and your family would be better off without her. if you stay in contact she could seriously harm your DC.

Stay no contact. Nothing good will come of having a relationship with this woman

What lily said, spot on.

Do you really want to invite this into your child's life? And give your child the life you had with her.

You have not fallen out, you are not sad, you have simply decided that she crossed too many lines, and with good reason. If she really cared I rather imagine she would have been in touch by now, so let her be.

It is quite normal when you are nc to have the dips when self doubt clouds our best judgement. You are modelling self care now, you are being a good parent by keeping the toxic harmful people out of your lives. Tell the flying monkeys to stop badgering you, and go LC with them unless they can respect your position.

Complete narcissist and her threatening behaviour given your health is basically abusing your poor child before it's even been born. Cut her out, she will be no loss to any of you ("with friends like that, who needs....etc.)

She sounds awful and I hope you are happy with your little one now. You don't need someone like this in your life and one day she'll turn on someone else like your siblings and they'll know what it's like.

Definitely don't let her back in your or your families life. My gran was a narcissist and I wish my mum had been strong enough to cut contact with her.