AIBU to take sick leave from work?

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Hi all.

I have been diagnosed with PCSO. I have been TTC since January and now being referred to a fertility clinic. I’ve had no period at all since April. I live with my in-laws and I am in constant battle with them which is making me depressed, not sleeping properly and over thinking. We are saving to move out my husband is supportive and doesn’t agree with the way his family is acting. So moving out right now isn’t an option until we have enough for a deposit. I just feel exhausted constantly with taking care of my husband and keeping everyone else happy so they don’t have anything negative to say about me - even though they still find something to say. I’m shattered and I’m falling ill every couple of weeks with a cold and sore throat. Infertility is making me even more sad on top. I’m hoping to get some answers when I attend the fertility clinic but that’s not till January 2020. AIBU to take some time off work and explain my situation. I feel like I’m just so tired and just need to sleep and relax. Only problem is I’m working a secondment position as a senior so I have been given an amazing opportunity at work. But I feel like even one week to recuperate would be amazing! But I feel guilty - do I even have any good reason?

can't you take vacation/holiday? that's what i do when I'm tired

I'd take annual leave or unpaid leave.

If what you're describing is stress and depression then a visit to the GP is in order. If not, take some leave.

Btw, I was ttc ds for 2 years as I also have pcos. I was advised to exercise and lose weight. I did and we conceived in the end. We conceived dd within 3 months - she's now 3. I can completely relate, but just wanted to offer some hope. Pcos doesn't always mean complete infertility.

Thank you for your kind words. i feel silly going to the GP as if I’m just being weak?

If you feel that you can't go to work because it's better for your (mental) health not to, then go to the GP. That's what they're there for.

If you're just wanting R&R take leave. TBH you just sound tired and lethargic, i'd think annual leave more appropriate.

Surely if you take sick leave, you will be at home which is what is causing you the issues?

I was planning on staying at my mums house instead.

If living with your in laws is causing you so much stress, can you not live with your mum until the housing situation is sorted?

I'd take annual leave if I were you - and go and stay with your mum, definitely have a break from in laws! Can you stay with your mum more generally?

Your husband can take cAre if himself, you sound like you need to use some annual leave rather than sickness. IMO.

I just feel exhausted constantly with taking care of my husband and keeping everyone else happy

Does your husband have a medical condition that requires care? Is it not a fully functioning adult?

What are you actually sick with?

I get that you are fed up. And unhappy. And profoundly sad about your fertility difficulties. But does this add up to truly depressed?

It sounds more like you are ground down by how miserable life is at the moment. But time to relax and sleep is what holidays are for, isn't it?

Can you commute to work from your mum's?

I have PCOS and you will need your sick leave for when you start IVF as PCOS can mean lots of unplanned visits to the clinic as well as last minute egg retrievals and embryo transfers. don’t waste any of it now. If you have leave I suggest you use that, or perhaps try as a pp said, to commute from your mum’s.

I get your wish to sleep and rest, but from what you describe work is a good distraction.

Why are you having to take care of your husband, is he ill?

Thanks you everyone. I have taken some annual leave and will be staying at my mums to get a break.