AIBU to ask view on ‘naughty step’.

[EmbarrassingMama]

AIBU to think that a 5 minute timeout on the naughty step, as implemented by nursery in the baby room (0-22 months) is absurd?

Not sure what age they start but know this is happening to 16 months +.

WWYD? What would OFSTED think of it?

I don't think moving a child from a situation into a quiet area to calm down is a big deal.

That's too young IMO. My nursery wouldn't use this method at any age and neither would I.

Ofsted? Why don’t you just remove your child if it’s not for you?

I think it's more difficult at nursery than at home, as at home it's easier to distract a child or take the time to explain why what they are doing is wrong. In nursery if child A wants child B's toy, distraction doesn't really work and unless they physically move the child somewhere else, child A is just going to keep snatching. At that age I'd expect it to be very brief though

Ridiculous. Age inappropriate anyway, if it’s ever a good idea (I don’t think so). There are far better ways to support sociable, acceptable behaviour and to encourage kindliness etc etc than the flippin naughty step. I’d be investigating a change of nursery, personally.

Yes - helping a child calm down is fine. Plonking him or her on a naughty step (ffs) for five minutes (wtf?) is not.

I can't imagine any 18 month old baby consciously being 'naughty' or having the level of development to understand why they're being isolated. By all means remove a furious child from an upsetting situation until they calm down, but with a responsive adult very nearby. Preschool children need guidance and education, not punishment, isolation and shaming.

5 minutes is a long time. We tend to give DD (2.5) 30 secs to a minute 'thinking time'. 😂

Is it a "naughty step" where they have to sit there alone and think about their behaviour for 5 minutes. Or is it a time out where they are taken to a quiet area to calm down?

I think there is a big difference. 5 minute naughty step is too long for a 16 month old.

At under 2 it's completely inappropriate IMO, children respond well to being comforted that they can't have something and then moved along to the next activity. Only one nursery we looked at of 6 had this as their policy. The place is like a chaotic farmyard where children "pick" which area they're going in and despite having "enough" staff it looked like a lot of kids were left to their own devices, so it's obviously easier for squabbles to break out. The other nurseries don't have a "discipline" issue at that age because they actually look after the kids. I don't know why some parents like that nursery but they do, it must align with some values they have that I don't share because I don't understand it. In fact several of us who viewed it were comparing notes and all equally confused, but we shrugged off that we're all closer to attachment parenting style so maybe it's just us. Move your child if you don't like it.

I have a 21month old and don't do the naughty/thinking step and wouldn't be happy with a nursery that did. I have friends that do use it at a slightly older age, and I don't judge them at all for that, I just don't think it works at all for under 2's.

Mine is going through a pushing/hitting phase currently when someone trys to play near him/with something he is playing with. I tell him no, its okay to say no to someone but we don't hit/push and we need to share/take turns. I warn him not to do it again or I'll remove him, if he does, I move him away from the child in question, explain again and then move him on to a different toy or area.

Pretty strong consensus! Thanks everyone. I thought it sounded highly inappropriate to make a child of that age sit on a ‘naughty chair’ for that long. Given most “bad” behaviour is just out of frustration and they have no real concept of it.

Totally on board with removing a child from a situation to calm them down / explain that they’ve upset someone. Was the fixed time period and step approach that just seemed utterly inappropriate to me.

Thanks

Completely inappropriate and ofsted would not be impressed. Totally appropriate if the child is being taken away from a situation to sit with a staff member.

I think that’s a bit young; DD is 2 and we’ve just started the thinking step/thinking time where she’s removed from the situation and I sit with her and either let her calm down or explain what she’s done wrong.
I don’t think she’d have got it at 16 months and I don’t like the naughty step word/concept of being left alone.