To not go out for friends birthday

[ConfusedAndStressed95]

It's my friends birthday in Leeds and he's asked a load of us to go out drinking/clubbing with him to celebrate. Not my sort of thing but it's his birthday so his choice.
But I'm really really anxious about it. I've never been clubbing really where we live there is limited options, I've never been to this city and I don't know what to wear or what to expect. I'd be travelling there and back with at least one person I'm friends with but I don't know anyone else who's going and I've no idea what I'm supposed to wear.
I would like to see my friend and spend time with him but the idea of going is filling me with dread. I don't do make up, fancy hair, heels or clothes and I've no idea what I'm going to do. But I think I should go because he'd do the same for me. But I don't want to stick out like a sore thumb.
Disclaimer, I have high functioning autism so this sort of thing is a bit of a minefield for me.

Wear the read top with some black skinny's/jeggings and some chunky heeled boots. You'll be comfortable!

Don't worry about lipstick - if you feel like you need something just get some shiny lipgloss. Much easier to apply as much less likely to make a mess with.

@AmIThough,thanks that’s what I did and I had a good night. I doubt I’d do it again though.

Well done for going. The red top looks ace on you.

First time I've seen this thread, but when I started reading it, I hoped you'd go - and you did! Fantastic.

Glad you had a good night, a brand new experience and you got to be with your friend for his birthday.

If I was you, i would try to find some red or black lace and stitch a little panel in the clevage bit - sewing it together might make it too tight and then you'll be worrying about it not holding.

The red really suits you.

Can you google a few of the club names in the area you're going to or look them up on Facebook? Most clubs put photos on their social media pages these days, that might give you an idea of what the dress code is like so you feel more prepared for what to expect.

Sorry, just seen that you've been - hlad you had a nice time

@TheCatInAHat, thanks. It’s not my usual style at all but I didn’t feel as awkward wearing as I thought I would.

@Seahorseshoe, I think next year I’ll offer to pay for him to do an escape room or something. It was fun enough but I don’t think I’d do it again.

@KeepYourCup, thanks, that’s what I would have done if I’d known about it in advance. My mother suggested sewing it but I knew when I put it one that it wouldn’t hold and would make the top uncomfortable. It was fun and I’m glad I went. I’m also glad it’s unlikely he’d expect me to do it again.

I'm glad you went and enjoyed yourself

Could you meet him earlier that day for a late lunch/early dinner?

You are not obligated to go op! If he's your friend he knows you don't go clubbing etc so should understand!

Take earplugs and sunglasses and don't fucking worry about what the NTs think.

I absolutely hate clubbing, its too loud and everyone is sweaty and smells weird and they're all drunk and the toilets are always disgusting, the girls in the toilets make me feel uncomfortable (they all go in groups and I feel weird being alone even though I don't understand why they are in groups to use the toilet?!) the floors are often sticky, the lights are overwhelming, i cant wear my pjs etc etc etc

BUT

I still did it on occasion when I was physically able (haha! I have the perfect wheelchair excuse now!) and it was actually good for me on some level. Wouldn't have coped without the dark sunnies and earplugs though

Ah I didn't notice the update! Well done!

@AmIThough, thanks, it was fun and it was nice to see my friends in an environment that I've not seen them in before.

@Mammyloveswine, love your username. He was pleased I went, on birthdays and other events I like to make the effort for them. I think it's important for relationships to put yourself out from time to time.

@NotANeuroticApple, thanks, oddly enough I like the way girls are in club toilets. It's usually one of the kinder places to be, at least in my experience. Thankfully one of my friends from this city came with me and he was great company and very helpful when it came to getting home.