With a work disciplinary this friday + going forward (long read)

[Yellowskies1988]

Ok I've been employed by my work force since 2013. Basically I'm a factory worker... for the first 5 years I dont think I had 1 sick day. The last 12 months I've had 16 days over 3 occasions. 1 day was last November I cant honestly remember.

June this year I had alot of family issues, son has autism, wife had Huntington's disease, work were made aware of this april/may this year, I asked my doctor to sign me off for a week because I was exhausted to be honest and diagnosed with severe depression.

Mid October this year I went home from work, got misdiagnosed with vertigo via nurse practitioner (glands and tongue swelled up) I had a kidney infection, was on a drip, gave blood tests and had to have an ultrasound scan too... I was signed off by the doctor for 2 weeks he wanted to give me an extra week off when I went back after my antibiotics but I felt alot better, not perfect but better.

Anyway I've got a discipline hearing, work are aware of my family situation, I went to HR last July to ask for help or flexi time to take my son to his special school, we live 2.5 miles away and are responsible for getting him there as we live within 3 mile radius. Work really didn't want to know. They wanted me to do everything but come out to drive him as he simply cant walk that far he isnt road safe at all and constantly needs restraining by me or my wife, plus her Huntingtons disease is starting to show symptoms, she doesn't drive.

Am I being a little bit too frustrated at work and should see what they say? My face isnt one that fits in and I feel I'll get a warning l, which i dont feel I deserve as I have already told work about my personal life and how tough it is.

Does your work use the Bradford score for measuring absence from work?
Your score would be 138 for the absence you've had, and some employers have 'a conversation' when your score reaches 100.
They might just be checking it was legitimate reasons, or seeing what they can do to help.
I can see that your family situation gives you far bigger challenges than a few sick days though.

You have what seen like valid reasons and it may just be the way they do things. I hope it goes ok for you.

@SluggishSnail it uses the system that If you have 3 separate occasions your required to attend a disciplinary hearing that's what my letter has stated anyway. I'm not getting worked up but as I'm off tomorrow, wife has an appointment with her neurologist, and they handed me my letter right at the end of my shift today I don't really have much time to contact my union representative (been a member for 5 years) to arrange any prior chats before the hearing really.

@PurpleFlower1983 as above I'm probably just getting worked up over nothing but I'm a little concerned that they might be starting to try to get me out of the company before my wife does start to require more help.

I never have used but I really am tempted to start using my parental leave days, along as I give 3 weeks notice I cant take individual days my oldest son has been.l diagnosed autistic. But I dont want to be petty really

Don't know about the disciplinary but the 3 mile rule doesn't apply to SEN kids, go back to your council and argue this ....

SEN rules ....

I think you are right to consider this as warning signs.

Worst case scenario (losing your job) is going to make your life so much more difficult than it already is. You'd have to job hunt with the same set of criteria around your commitments but knowing that future employers wouldn't choose you over someone without all those issues, however valid they are.

For that reason, your priority must be to keep your job. That has to be number one as it would be so much worse without it.

Convince them of course that everything is valid, but don't expect them to have sympathy for you as their bottom line is to make profit, not provide employment.

What concerns me is that it's hard to make a guarantee that things will get easier for you and there will be less of an impact for work. That's what they may focus on, that it won't get better.

You do need to talk to your union. But when you think of the alternative, scrabbling around having been sacked looking for another job, your number one priority should be to keep your job by coming across as "employable".

Should you not have more than 2 days notice for a disciplinary hearing. I would be rescheduling if you do not have time to organise a rep. Do not attend the meeting on your own.

They gave you a letter today, Wednesday, for a disciplinary on Friday? That's not reasonable notice. Ask them to postpone so you have time to speak to your union rep.

If they're being reasonable and want to clarify if you need extra support, they won't mind, but if, as you suspect, they might be thinking about getting you out, your union should be all over this.

A disciplinary can be mega stressful, even if you're pretty sure it'll go in your favour, and having someone else on hand to give support, who should have good knowledge about your rights. You have a lot going on - share the burden where you can.

Make sure you know what is in your contract and code of conduct. Review the ACAS guidelines on disciplinaries. Make sure you know what the process is in your place - they don't have to follow ACAS, though it's good practice, but they do have to follow employment law - there's also some info on the gov.uk website about your rights and timelines.

But do ask them to postpone so you have some prep time.

@FluffyEarMuffs I work shifts currently 6-1400 and 1400-2200 I'm thinking about requesting flexihours, permanent 1 shift days/noons. It would be easier to work 6-1400 permanent as it's the longer time the kids are in school but I'm hoping to get help via my wifes neurologist to provide letters to back up my request. Just trying to see if that would work at home before I do make the request.

They cant sack me as it's my first occasion, my not on a written warning or any previous disciplinary procedure.

@dottyp0104 @ebearhug
I got the letter around 9pm ( working 1400-2200 this week) for a hearing on Friday at 1800. Dont know if they are aware I'm on annual leave tomorrow as wife has an appointment at 15:00 and I like to go because I dont fully understand Huntington's disease, obviously I'm aware of how it affects but I need to know so I can help my wife and voice my concerns. Plus its 12 miles away and she doesn't drive.

How, as I'm off tomorrow would I request a postponement in this hearing, do I turn up at 6pm Friday to make the request?

When my son was ill with epilepsy, the local county had a duty to prove him with transport to/ from school everyday until he was stable. There is a special medical circumstances procedure which means the usual walking distance rules do not apply. It could be that your local county will offer a taxi, a bus service or similar but worth exploring. You may find the transport manager for schools to be more interested in the annual budget than your circumstances, but persist as your child has rights. Knowing you are addressing this may also satisfy your employer.

Please take someone to the disciplinary meeting with you, like a trade union rep.

I would attempt to contact your rep tomorrow and take their advice - but if not able to get that advice then call and ask to postpone

The disciplinary is your opportunity to put over the issues you face and work can look at ways to help within reason.

I would refer to your previous years of good attendance and that you asked for flexi time due to the problem.

I would refer to your wifes health issues and that despite all this issues you have provided an excellent standard of work.

Speak to the Council travel to school provider to see if you qualify for help with travel. It is provided on SEND need rather than distance.

Your absence with doctors note is covered and often with a trigger of x amounts of absence it is a formality for those with genuine reasons.

I would not be unduly worried but I would ensure I have a list of bullets points to bring up as often ones mind goes blank when feeling under stress.

No advice as such, but this sounds like a really awful situation for you, so I hope it all goes okay and is resolved in the best way for you and your family.

Sometimes things conspire, and create one big nightmare, when actually you just need a break.

How, as I'm off tomorrow would I request a postponement in this hearing, do I turn up at 6pm Friday to make the request?

Phone, email? First thing Friday is better than nothing. The fact you had already booked leave for today makes it even more unreasonable notice, because you have no working time to do any preparation.

i work shifts currently 6-1400 and 1400-2200 I'm thinking about requesting flexihours, permanent 1 shift days/noons. It would be easier to work 6-1400 permanent as it's the longer time the kids are in school but I'm hoping to get help via my wifes neurologist to provide letters to back up my request. Just trying to see if that would work at home before I do make the request.

Your employer is solely concerned about it working for them as a business. If it does not affect their business to have you on a permanent shift, and they want to keep you, they will agree I hope. But for business reasons, they may well refuse so it's not a care of YOU seeing if it will work at home, but you trying to keep your job.

They cant sack me as it's my first occasion, my not on a written warning or any previous disciplinary procedure.

If they want to get rid of you, they will find a way. This is part of a process to them. It could keep ticking over for ages and please speak to your union but at the end of the day, unless you think you can easily find work that fits in with your family (and I am extremely sympathetic) you need to try to keep this job.

This IS serious as it's the first step in their process. You have few rights; your employer has more. You can't force them to keep you on. The best you can hope for IF it goes down that route is a pay-off... and you'll be in the position of needing to find new work.

My advice is, go in with the attitude that you want to work with them to reinstate and then carry on your previous great working record.

Being out of a job is not a pleasant prospect and is going to make your family's life harder. Don't even be the hint of antagonistic; you need to win them over now.

Make sure you have seen a copy of your employer's sickness policy and any other relevant documents. If you aren't going to have time to arrange for your union rep to accompany you, you can ask for a postponement.

They have to follow proper procedure - which can also mean that they do, in fact, understand the situation and are willing to work with you, but they still have to call this meeting as that's what the policy says.

First, may I say I really feel for you in your situation. Second, I work in a similar environment. You have been given reasonable notice. You should try and contact a union rep today. If not, make it your priority when you get to work tomorrow. In my place of work we would open the meeting, ask if you want a rep. If you say yes and that you didn't have time to arrange one the meeting would be adjourned until your next shift. But they could also adjourn the meeting and put a call out for any rep that's available that day. You should also be given sufficient time to discuss with your rep before the meeting or during the adjournment.

I would draw their attention to the fact that until this year you've had an impeccable attendance record. As others have also said wrt change of shift permanently, your employer may be helpful but they don't have to be. Perhaps you could ask them for a temporary change of hours until you get your son's school transportation sorted and find out more about your wife's situation.

In our place the union reps always get a reasonable amount of time to discuss the case with the employee before the meeting. You should have some information from your union with a phone number for more information and advice. Good luck, but if your employer is reasonable you shouldn't need it.

What a shame. I’m so sorry for all you’re dealing with.

I agree with getting some advice and also having a look at the law around associatiive discrimination, if many of your absences are due to your association with a disabled person ie your wife or son.

Please contact the Huntington's Disease Association for support. They have regional advisors who can support your family. They can also advise on benefits etc, for example, would your wife be entitled to PIP? For the mental health aspects of HD if not the physical.

Depending on where you live, the neurology appointment may not be helpful in advising you regarding HD. In some areas it is a multi professional approach which can be more helpful than just a non-specialist neurologist.

Please also get your Local Authority to reconsider transport for your son. He should be entitled and if not, call an emergency Annual Review of his EHC Plan to force the LA to put in individual travel training etc..... They would then need to a full assessment of his needs and may cave and put allocate transport. You could also ask for a Section 17 social care assessment and a parent carers assessment for you and you wife for support if this hasn't already been completed.

I suppose I am trying to say if it doesn't work out with your job, there is a plan about what happens next.

Good luck, HD is an awful disease and none of you need the stress and strain of wondering if you have a job next week.

www.gov.uk/flexible-working

Hope this helps good luck x

Thanks guys. Read through all your messages. Spoke to my union rep this morning to make them aware, the disciplinary went well... as I've already been to HR explaining my situation before hand at home they understand what's going on and wiped my absence slate clean as I have a good record previously and offered me support going forward... any time I need in advance if I need anything ask them, if I want to do my paperwork or make phone calls for my home life situation they can arrange a private room for me to use their phone line etc. Positive going forward.

Great news! Sounds like they just use the Bradford factor to trigger these meetings irrespective of situations. Our HR dept used to say it was also to provide employees support as well which you always feel dubious about so glad it can be true!

Great outcome - glad to hear it!

So glad for you

Very very very pleased for you!