To be so calm after separation

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I really would appreciate your opinions please. My husband announced that he didn't love me and wanted a separation at the end of August. He felt that I always thought the worst of him and that he hated my attitude towards him. My take on this is a husband and father who was literally and mentally absent from his family for years and as his obsession with his work grew, so did the chasm between family and marriage.
He is a shouty aggressive frustrated man who didn't do a tap to f housework or child rearing unless asked and we walked a lot on egg shells.
He is lazy and supremely selfish and would often leave jobs undone for weeks f
Not
Months on end knackered wing I couldn't do them.
My aibu is whether you think I'm being abnormal because I'm calm, not angry, not
Really sad, kind of relieved . My friends are very worried about me
Because I am not angry or heartbroken . I'm worried that I may be having a break down
Unknown to myself. My counsellor says I'm deep in trauma but not depressed. I feel like I am
Living and out of body experience every day . But sad/ unhappy?? I'm not. I've been lonely in my marriage for years. What's going on here please and thank you for reading.

Weird typos there sorry!

Yanbu when I was in an emotionally abusive relationship with ex I watched some of our friends split and they always texted or fb messaged etc and I remember thinking why? If you split you don't want to hear from them (unless dc of course). When we split I was so relieved, I didn't feel regret at all and I blocked him on everything because I really didn't want to hear from him. Everyone was astonished that I didn't want to discuss things with him or talk about it but I had completely disconnected from him and didn't care. Now happily married to Dh and still 12 years later people mention ex the odd time and I couldn't give a shit and tune out.

Thanks. We are amicable but I have no anger at all . I just feel numb . Anyone else?

Even though you are resigned to the split it sounds as if you are actually in the shocked stage . You may progress to disbelief , anger and all the other emotions . You really could do with talking a bit more - either on here or with someone you trust ?

maybe you are feeling free and that the pressure if off you, no more walking on egg shells, no more picking up after an ungrateful asshole, you and the kids can finely breathe.... relief maybe?

I have good friends and family and a counsellor . I'm
Talking but it's so hard so hard with kids around all the time and
Putting on an act. I am numb I guess. I feel dead inside

Why would you be sad or unhappy that you have got rid of the useless piece of skin (and organs, bones, etc.) on the end of a penis.

Relief I would definitely accept. Hopefully, before too long there will be moments of happiness too even if it's only happy about what you no longer have go do or go through.

"My aibu is whether you think I'm being abnormal because I'm calm, not angry, not Really sad, kind of relieved"

"I have no anger at all . I just feel numb ."
You don't feel numb. You have already said you feel calm, and kind of relieved. That is not numb.

Maybe the chasm that you talked of and the loneliness you felt is no different now that you are apart to when you were together? If life isn't significantly different then why expect to feel any different?

I don't think it's abnormal at all. I could understand anger if he'd deceived you but no reason to be angry at him ending the relationship when both of you were unhappy in it.