Name Change - Actually Required?

[PumpityPumpPump]

Do people really get found out on here? I see alot of name change so people don't know it's me, I don't know who you are anyway?

Some posters change after they get flamed because people have got the wrong end of the stick and it’s got nasty.

Posted once kept openly accusing my DH of sexually abusing his daughter because she was bed wetting. It really upset my and I left MN for a year.

I've seen it a lot, I wouldn't have a clue how to change mine though I guess it's needed if you may have friends or family also on here. It's up to them.

I recognised someone on here. Not because of their name, but because of what they posted. I knew them (vaguely) IRL, and based on what they put in the post, I knew immediately it was them. I PM'd them. We ended up having a long PM chat about their situation as they were really struggling. I looked at my inbox for the first time in months the other day though and all messages have been deleted by MN at the other posters request (so says the deletion message). So they must have come to the conclusion that they shared too much. Have seen them around since our conversation, but they've never approached me.

It's just a way of maintaining your anonymity.

The thing is, a lot of what people think is identifying isn't at all.

Most of us are parents with children. Most of those children are at school/nursery/uni. Most of us have parents, siblings, friends. We work, shop, go on holiday.

Someone posting that they've name changed and then go on to tell a very generic story about a disagreement at school or a run-in with a worker in a shop does not risk being identified.

I have a few personas on here. One of them has posted very identifiable things that don't matter if I am recognised, but were things I wanted advice about (e.g. health issues). I wouldn't care really if anyone recognised me, but I wouldn't want them, having done so, to be able to find out about my feelings for my MiL or how often I have sex...

Some posters change their names and then post about the same thing again and again though, so they are easy to spot! As if a change of name will make them right the umpteenth time they post the same problem or conceal part of the story to make themselves look better. They are the ones that tend to be reminded of their previous posts!

I've recognised someone on here before. The first post roused my suspicions but could have been a coincidence but when I read her posting history (because I'm a nosy begger) it was confirmed. I did see a few posts she probably would have preferred to keep private.

@Bromeliads Exactly. There's also the issue of one recognisable post then being linked to the rest of your posting history which might include personal info.

I name change every few months

People do AS stuff

Literally the other day someone was caught out posting that their BIL was being off with them

Advanced Search revealed woman had claimed to be madly in love with BIL and was not subtle about it

Oh and there was the time a stepmum was recognised by someone from the circumstances posted alone, and another step parent involved within the same wider family was told about it, read thread and posted

If your posts include details of your DC's names, where you live, what you look like and so on, then you can be identified.
If you then want to have a good moan about your neighbour or want advice on what to do about your relationship, do you really want someone to search your posts and guess who you are?

Just remember to change it back afterwards.

I change mine often because of what people are saying here. One post might be slightly recognisable and may make someone who knows you wonder if it's you. A previous post search will probably confirm it.

I don't give a shit if anyone I knew IRL recognised me, maybe I am in the minority.

I know I have a stalker. So I name change frequently so dodge that person

Searching a poster's previous posts isn't the domain of the bored though . It's very useful if you have concerns that a poster is genuine or not.

I'm not bothered about being identified for anything I've posted so far as it's not too personal... But if I posted in the future about something sensitive, I wouldn't want people to be going back o se my old posts and finding that I bake cakes, have a dog, have a Scottish DP (or whatever) to confirm my identity.
And people say they have NC to confirm they're not new.
So it does all make sense

I think it's wise to regularly name change.

I see some threads where posters put pictures of their living room up, for example, if someone's looking for inspiration. Someone could come along and see "Oh, that's Sharon's living room," then look up her posting history and find out all about her piles, DH's affair, health issues, etc. So I'd definitely NC for posting very outing pictures like that, or if I needed to post about a unique situation that's easily recognisable.

I think it's great we have the option to NC, but then if you NC to post about an embarrassing medical issue, you'll get a lot of "welcome to mumsnet OP", and "interesting first post " so name changing has a downside too.

I know I have a stalker. So I name change frequently so dodge that person

Do you mean you're being hounded by a poster on here? Or someone you know IRL that looks up your posts? That's quite creepy.

Otherwise I don’t know either as usually the content is what’s outing rather than the name

It's more that if I post something with content that is outing, I don't then want me who recognise me from the content to be able to do a search on my username and see everything I've ever posted about, which may include personal, embarrassing, or sensitive things. So I name change.

*people who recognise me, oops

I name change frequently, mumsnet is public and searchable.

Someone posting that they've name changed and then go on to tell a very generic story about a disagreement at school or a run-in with a worker in a shop does not risk being identified.

I mean, they kind of do, if they've told the same story to somebody else.

Eg OP had a run in with a shop worker who said something rude, they post on mumsnet about it. They had also told the story to their MIL because it came up in conversation. MIL reads mumsnet, recognises the story, and can then search posting history to see exactly what her DIL has ever said about her.

MIL used as example only - I actually love mine!

Do people really get found out on here?

There was one quite recently. Poster was part of a group and was a bit upset over something (I’m being deliberately vague here) and another MNer actually commented that she was part of the same group and the reason for X, Y & Z was......
I thought it cruel to publicly say they knew who this person was, a dm would have been kinder.

Imagine if you posted something, someone recognised it and then told other RL people, who could all freely search through all your posting history! Not surprising some people frequently name change.

A poster on here recognised the person i was talking about, and i hadn't even gone into much detail

That gave me pause for thought

I have my main name (this one) then I nc for other things that are more outing. Things about work etc. Altho I did have a post on here which was quite specific and forgot to nc. One of said friends saw it as it was on one of the emails you receive haha oops !

I have said whereabouts I live whilst using one name, plus what my job is whilst using another. Add that to a few other bits and pieces and I think it would be quite easy for someone who knew me to figure out who I was. Occasionally it is nice to be able to get something off your my chest on here and I prefer to do that incognito.

Similarly, is it necessary to say you've had a name change? Surely just not mentioning it and carrying on as normal would be less change of being found out?