To ask if anyone chooses to spend Christmas alone?

[supercee]

I have a fairly small family with no kids. Christmas usually consists of me going to my parents (I'm late 30's and single) and maybe one of my two siblings will be there, otherwise they would be on holiday or with their partner.

I don't have the best relationship with my mother and there have been many times we haven't been speaking over Christmas. This year we have been fine until now, it's has kicked off again (for various reasons).

I have always entertained the idea of just spending Christmas Day on my own, in my own flat, in my jammies, drinking and eating what the fuck I want. I always feel invisible at my parents house anyway, one particular sibling always dominates conversation and my mum hangs off their every word. My dad due to ill health and alcoholism is very unpredictable and in a hot minute can spoil it (usually for me).

Does anyone else do this? Are you lonely? Do you love it? Is it a case of the idea sounds great but would I be incredibly lonely on the day?

Sounds like bliss to me. Some favourite foods and drinks, not get dressed and just do what I wanted all day.

I've not done it but love the idea of it. I'd buy some new festive pj's especially for the day, take my duvet downstairs, eat lovely M&S buffet food, watch boxsets all day. Buy in some nice bath stuff and candles and have a long soak. Drink mulled wine, read a good book. Put fresh sheets on the bed to get into later. It sounds like a perfect day

I'm looking forward to mine

Just tell them you have a colleague who is going through a bad time and you have decided to spend the day with them.
Get all your goodies in, treat yourself to new pjs , and enjoy your day !

My friend is spending CD alone this year, he's turned down all invites and just wants to skip everything and be by himself. He lost his Mum this year and his children will be with his ex wife. He's planning on doing some decorating and not even having a Christmas dinner. He is a very, very mentally strong person.

I think there is so much pressure on Christmas Day. I spend so many days happily alone yet this particular day seems depressing if you're not having the time of your life. There's a belief that everyone else on the planet is surrounded by happy families or whatever but in reality I doubt that's even half true.

(Happy for the ones that are though!)

I think spending a special day alone is shit (for the vast majority of humans) ... but possibly better than spending it in company of people if you genuinely feel those people don’t value your company.

I have done it a few times. Doesn't bother me. I usually just go for a long run and then watch tv. But I'm not a very Christmassy person.

I've had a few Christmases alone, I love it. December is busy and a bit tiring it's nice to be on your own and do what you want.

supercee I get you, but if you cry, it will be with relief that you are avoiding the family shenanigans.

Sounds marvellous. I'd love to do that. Enjoy.

I won't be entirely alone as I'll have DS5. But I am hoping the council can find us a home before Christmas because I want to escape my toxic family whom I am forced to live with or be on the streets.

I want to do Christmas my way with no "input" from others. I want to wake up, do the presents santa thing, then I want to share a nice meal I have cooked and prepared with my son, then both of us can pop on our matching festive PJ's eat chocolates, play with the toys, watch TV till bedtime for him. Then I want to relax in peace and quiet with a glass of wine more chocolate and the TV till my bedtime.

Oh @MaleficentsCrow I'm praying you get that!

I've done xmas on my own and thoroughly enjoyed it. DD.is an only and her partner is the youngest of quite a few and I really understand why DDs partner would like to spend some Xmaxes with her Mum.

Dear sis has tried ( with the best intentions) to persuade me to go to her house for Xmas day.but it's really not my thing. Sis house is noisy, not an issue for some but it is for me. I wear hearing aids and background noise means I can't hear conversations. In turn that means I would spend the day not being able to contribute to a conversation. You can hardly get a book out and sit reading, can you?

On my own, I get up when I want, have the kind of lunch I want, have a few drinks, read a few chapters of a book, retire to bed, content and happy

I do it on the Christmas Days when the DC are with their dad. I have invitations to be with other family, but I don't want to be with anyone, so I do what a lot of PPs do. Stock the fuck up on nibbles and prosecco, buy a load of books and spend the day on the sofa in naice pyjamas that only get worn for those CDs. It's my present to myself

Starting to flick through the M&S chrimbo food catalogue as we speak!

I actually do like Christmas, just this year has been a real wake up call in terms of who has really been emotionally supportive and there for me (no one) and who hasn't (everyone else).

So I may as well spend the day with my nearest and dearest which is eh, me!

I usually spend Christmas alone. DH is always away with work, no family nearby and I feel guilty taking friends up on their offers. Being alone is actually quite nice as you can do whatever you want, eat what you want, wear what you want. I've also spent the day volunteering but as pp have said start looking now if that idea appeals to you as most charities seem to be oversubscribed and turning volunteers away on Christmas day ime.

Why not do a few hours volunteering somewhere so you get out and see people, feel good but get the rest of the day to yourself ?

@Stephminx yes I think I'll look into volunteering.

“Just tell them you have a colleague who is going through a bad time and you have decided to spend the day with them.”

I would do something like this so as not to give them ammunition.

I had two Christmas days completely alone in my early 30s. I bought a load of nice M&S food (not actually Christmas stuff), got a big book I had been looking forward to, some wine, and barricaded myself in. On the day I had a long lie, a bath and fresh pyjamas, then just pottered about. I had offers to spend the day with friends but didn’t want to get in the way. The following year I was dating my DP, and while I was invited to his family I felt like it would be intruding, so he came round in the evening instead.

I’ve spent Christmas at a women’s holiday centre a few times. Sort of like a hostel, but just women and children.

It was absolutely wonderful every time and I hope to do it again when kids are grown up and not wanting their old home Christmas.

So liberating. I loved being free of the constraint of the routines is a family Christmas, and meeting lovely new people who also wanted to get away from all that.

I'm in my early 40's. The other year I was alone at Christmas, my Partner was aboard for a GP's last Christmas and our dog needed one of us there. I got invites to other people, but chose to spend the day alone rather than driving all over the place.

It was heaven! I had a lovely lay in, watched movies, had a lovely day doing what I wanted, to my timescales. It was bliss.

I've spent Christmas alone and actually really enjoyed it. Made sure I had my favourite foods in, a nice bottle of wine, lined up some films to watch, bought a good book for myself and had an indulgent afternoon nap.

My DSM (dear step mum) used to spend Christmas alone until she met our DD (dear dad). Our DD works holidays like Christmas etc. She now spends time around DD's shifts some of the time she is waiting for him to wake up then she spends some time with our family before DD has to go back to work.
Before she met DD she often spent Christmas alone as her DCs went to their partner's families or the father who failed to provide for them. She did spend a few Christmases with one of her DC but she had to endure her ex-husband being present at those events. She also had to share family birthdays with the ex-husband even when the birthday meal was being held at DSM's house.
This was the ex-husband who was absolutely horrible to DSM and her DC, he still has not paid a penny in support of his DC or their mum. Our DSM had thankfully seen through all this and now prefers not to endure spending time with the horrible man she divorced many years ago.
DSM would rather spend a few hours with DD and us than be forced to sit in the company of someone she knows is horrible.

Sounds like bloody heaven.