No interest in DTD

[girlfromthemoon]

I've always been able to take it or leave it if I've been single, but normally when I'm a relationship I would say I have a healthy sex drive

Things have been a bit hard with my partner for a few months, a few arguments and issues, nothing ground breaking just usual life stresses you but I literally have zero interest in sex with him, like to the point where it annoys me when he tries anything

We've discussed it but it's hard as I have no reason for it but it's obviously bothering him understandably and he's trying to put us both in the mood and initiate things and stuff but it just seems to make me feel mad and annoyed when he does!

This has never happened to me before and it's frustrating for us both!

Has anyone else experience this? It's not even like I'm not bothered about it, it's like I actively don't want to!! 😕

New contraception?

There could be hundreds of reasons op. It is normal though, I know I go through phases of it.

Often I just cba with the rigmarole of sex. I find it a lot of effort for not much reward as I really struggle to cum from P in V. I found focusing on foreplay for us both and not having sex really helped and was a lot of fun.

How long have you been together?

I always have a threshold beyond which I'm not interested anymore and In fact I actively avoid it. It's like their very touch makes me squirm. I think it's hormonal, but hormones can be affected by the length of time you're together.

I read a study (peer reviewed and everything) that if a couple doesn't make a baby in the first year (!) then they are x% more likely to split up. It's like the brain comes up with reasons to discount the partner as 'not made of the right stuff'.

Peri menopause? How old are you?

I feel similar. We have three kids and two have disabilities and I feel a bit burnt out to be honest. I’m 36.

Have you ruled out medical issues?
Do you kiss and cuddle and be intimate with each other? Are you properly satisfied when you do it?

I've been on the other side of this issue and it's horrible. I felt unloved, unwanted and very insecure. What worked was ramping up intimate contact, with out any pressure to DTD. Absolutely everything but DTD for 6 months. being honest with each other and explicitly communicating. It was a lovely time exploring each other. You really have to be committed to trying though.

I'm 33, he's a few years younger

No new medication, Been together a couple of years

It's not just that I don't fancy it, it's like the thought of it makes me squirm!

We're still cuddly and hold hands and snuggle on the sofa and kiss and stuff so we have the intimacy there

I understand from his point of view it must be awful and I don't want to be like this but I don't know how to fix it or where to go from here really

I think you may need to accept the fact that he is not the man for you. You are sexually incompatible. I would end it and stop wasting time.

We definitely used to be though, it's strange that it would change after all this time

I’ve found my mind is linked with my body so if he’s bothering me in my head I just can’t be sexually interested in him.