To stop potty training?

[rainplopsarefallingonmyhead]

It's becoming a nightmare and I'm struggling to see why we are still doing this?

DS is quite "behind" his peers due to some health issues which have now been rectified, nonetheless he's still playing catch up. He's 3 in a couple of weeks and we've been potty training since July.

When we are at home, he's always commando with trousers on. Pants always add to the problem and he will often wet himself with them on. He will use the potty with no problems at home and 99% of the time, unless he's very involved in a puzzle or something won't have any accidents. He isn't potty trained at night yet.

However whenever we're out of the house, be it the supermarket, shops, park, nursery, zoo etc I always ask him if he needs to go and he says no but will usually end up wetting himself, we are given zero warning.

I've persevered because he can do it at home and I thought it would come with time and he'd get better at being more aware when out and about. But it's not improving even slightly...

It's becoming a bit of a nightmare to be honest and DH has said he thinks we should put him back in nappies when out and about to avoid the incidents.

I'm not sure if this is confusing though and we're better off persevering?

Is it ok to use the potty at home and pull ups when out and about? I would still keep asking him if he needs to go and encourage toilet use when out and about regularly, but use the pull up as a backup for any accidents?

Thanks!

Oh yes I wouldn't try night time yet if he hasn't mastered day time.
Is he drinking loads before bed to be soaking in the morning

Explain he is only having a nappy for sleep as soon as we wake up its back to the potty

It is not possible to "train" for night dryness. Night dryness is only possible when the child starts to produce an anti diuretic hormone called vasopressin. It concentrates urine over night. If your child isn't producing it they wont go dry at night, and different children produce it at different ages. Just wait and at some point nappies will go dry in morning.

I followed all the guidelines about no nappies etc and after 3 days I was tearing my hair out. There were puddles everywhere, he peed everytime I nipped to the shop even if we had just been to the toilet and he was so embarrassed and sad about it he stopped wanting to sit on the toilet (v unusual as he has always been quite obsessed with the toilet). My DH came home from work and said, this isn't working I hate seeing you both falling out with each other he is obviously not ready, let's just do nappies and try again in a month.
The next day I (very sadly) put pants on with a nappy over the top under his shorts and as if by magic he has had one accident since (it's been about 2 months). We transitioned to pants and shorts after a week and he has been dry through the night since. I think there were 2 issues with my son, the first was embarrassment from public wetting and secondly he tends to be quite constipated. On days where he needs to poo he doesn't know when he needs and needs a lot more prompting.

I ask mine if she needs a wee. If she says no I say "well Mummy needs one so can you come with me/come and help me". When we are in the loo I ask again if she needs a wee. If she says no, fine, but she often says yes. I think it's usually because shes lazy or doing something else and doesn't want to make the effort to go to the toilets - but once we are there and the other distractions are removed she's happy to go.

I wouldn't bother with pants until he is a bit more reliable. I've not long trained my DS and he took a good 6 months to be 100% reliable when out and about. He doesn't like public toilets and it has been difficult to get him to go although he has always been good at home. He didn't wear pants for about 4 months, just went commando and then I started putting them on him and he wears them no problem. Sometimes the kids boxer shorts are better as they aren't so tight.

Btw I wouldn't put him in nappies although I totally understand why you would. We used to take loads of changes of clothes out with us! I found the 'Oh Crap' book very useful for training as long as you ignore all the bits about training in 3 days!