To consider putting my dog down?

[Wolfie26]

I have an 11 year old dog who means the absolute world to me. I have owned him since he was 8 weeks old and he has been there through all the ups and downs.

The past three years with him haven’t been the easiest due to health issues. Arthritis, cancer, back problems, issues with urinating, bowel issues, constipation are just a few amongst other random non specific issues. Despite all these issues, he is currently pretty happy, healthy an fairly fit. However, he regularly has issues with urinating in the house. Sometimes it’s like he has lost control and completely peed himself, sometimes he seems to leak urine and sometimes he just goes in the same place as if he has been caught short. He can go a few months without doing anything and then there are times where it seems to everyday. The only thing the vets ever found was crystals in his urine which he now gets a prescription diet for.

He has had numerous surgeries to remove lumps around his bum. The second last one, just over a year ago, was very invasive and it’s lucky he’s not completely incontinent. He generally has a slight smearing left on his bum after a poo, which is easily cleaned, but anytime his faeces becomes slightly loose he starts to leak. The whole of his bum and back legs end up covered in poo as does anything he comes in to contact with. Again, he can go a few months without having any incidents like this but unfortunately the older he gets, the more prone he seems to be to an upset tummy.

Since Saturday he has had complete liquid diarrhoea. No ‘accidents’ in the house but again he is leaking everywhere, he is covered in it and it ends up all over the house, smeared on walls, floor etc. I have lost count of the amount of times I have bathed his back end. Three this morning alone. I have carpets in the majority of the house which I am going to have to get professionally cleaned (for the fourth time this year). I have been trying to keep him in the kitchen but he is so upset at being locked away, he paces, spreads poo everywhere then gets even more upset as he doesn’t want to lie down in poo. I don’t even manage to clean everywhere before he needs showered and I need to start again. I barely even managed to speak to my own child last night as there was just poo everywhere. I finished cleaning at half 9, ordered pizza, put DS to bed then started again.

It’s not Ddog’s fault but I can’t live like this anymore. We have different prescription food from the vet and some different meds but realistically even when this stops, it’s only a matter of time before the next episode. My house is a mess, the living room stinks but I can’t change the flooring because it’s just going to happen again at some point and I can’t afford to be constantly redecorating. My dog really means the world to me but I am honestly just at breaking point right now, I can’t cope with it anymore 😔.

AIBU to consider putting him to sleep? I feel so bad even thinking it. He’s not a dog on it’s last legs, I don’t look at him and think it’s time but I really am at breaking point now.

Obviously it’s completely up to you and whatever you need to do. What I will say is that I had my dog for 10 years and he was awful for peeing in the house, did it if he was left for even a second. Everything smelled of dog piss and I was at my wits end with it. Then he escaped through a gap in the garden and he got hit by a car and passed away. I miss him terribly and would happily live in a piss stained house if it meant I could have him back. Obviously not exactly the same situation as yours OP but I would say don’t make any rash decision out of frustration because when they’re gone they’re gone.

@Wolfie26 - I remember when I questioned whether I needed to have my horse PTS - I posted on the equine forum. When I posted it was a genuine plea for advice but reading back through my own post I could see actually the answer was there in front of me. Whilst he may seem well I don't think dogs like making a mess in their own home and certainly wouldn't like to be in a mess themselves. It's very sad but reading back through this I think the decision to send him to Rainbow Bridge is the right one.

I can’t say either way as it’s so hard .
I was about to make that decision for my poor cat but he made it for me and died before I got there . Was totally heart broken .
Just wanted to say I think it shows how much you love him and I’m sure you’ll make the right decision for both of you

Please ignore all the comments about using nappies or pads, what you are doing is delaying the inevitable and robbing DDog of any dignity. And as much as you say he appears happy, I cannot imagine he fully is given his situation.

If you are not careful then you may also find your last memories of him tainted with resentment, as you labour to keep your house and him clean.

Ask yourself if you would be happy to live like that? And realistically as you've said, if this bout clears up you're simply waiting for the next one to strike. There are far worse things for a dog than to be PTS. They are unaware and it is the human family who suffer, rather than allowing him to continue to.

FWIW I truly believe the "better a week too early than a day too late" adage. I've had numerous pets over the years and I can honestly say that I barely recall them being I'll as we have allowed them to go before things got too bad.

I'd let him go. He is distressed by his condition, you say so yourself and personally I would want to be allowed to go with some dignity intact. Better too soon than too late.

Another voice saying let him go. He must be miserable spending his life covered in shit. The vet pointed out to us, when we made the same hard choice in June, that dogs are very stoic and try to mask pain. Time to say goodbye and return his dignity.

I sympathise, I had to get my cat pts in April, I’m surprised you haven’t done this already for your dog. Yanbu, it’s the kindest thing to do.

We had this with our dog. I think it’s time.

It's so sad OP but I think it's time too.

My Jack Russell was never fully house trained and would often have accidents. Cleaned them up willingly.
When she got to 16 she would wake up in a sopping wet bed and sit in puddles. This wasnt usual for her and was definitely distressing her.
I picked her from the litter when she was four weeks old, and it was a kindness that I let her go at the end just after her 16th birthday.
You know your dog best. It's the last thing you will do for your furry mate. But I think you know its time.

Let him go with some dignity. That is the last big act of love you can give him.

My Jack Russell was never fully house trained

Oh, please tell me this isn’t so! Our Jack is 13 weeks old ...

Alsohuman, selective toilet training. Clean for months and then puddles left with sly looks. I needed a firmer hand unfortunately I was swayed by the cute Jack that did tricks! Best dogs ever.

My first thought was a nappy but that only solves the issue of making a mess.

Urine burns can happen really quickly with incontinence, and their bums can also get really sore really quickly. Both of which can be really distressing for them.

Another thing to consider is some dogs don't mind being messy, but it can be really distressing for some dogs if they cannot get themselves clean. Again, some dogs will happily have a bum bath but others will really find it very stressful.

You know your dog best and how your dog copes with it all. I don't know what I would do in your shoes, I do know that quality of life would be at the forefront of my decision

Actually, thinking about this further, I know it is all about the dog, but an owner unable to cope is an equally valid reason in this case I think. Nobody else would be likely to take him on and care for him and if you are at the end of your tether, there is no shame in doing what is right for you and your family.
I do firmly believe that it would be the right thing for your dog though. There's nothing worse than witnessing someone keep a dog going for too long, they always say that they love them and do everything they can for them, but the reality is often that they can't let them go and it is the animal that pays the price.

Thanks for everyone’s replies. Things have gotten worse over the past few weeks. I decided to do further investigations and we’ve now established that he has a mass in his lower intestine. Vets are pretty sure this is causing the problem. At his age, surgery really isn’t a sensible option so we are going to stick him on steroids and keep our fingers crossed. We’ll know in a couple of days if they are working and if not, I’ll put him to sleep. Thanks again for all the advice - it made me feel like less of a shitty person at a pretty horrific time.