Unequal treatment at work??

[SummerVibe]

I have recently returned to work after unplanned absence of over one month. During all this time off my supervisor didn't message me at all. As I haven't been on long term sick leave before I didn't dwell too much on it.

Anyhow I have since returned to work recently and another colleague has taken planned sick leave for two weeks. My supervisor has sent a team email that they think it would be nice to send this colleague flowers and a card and do people wish to contribute. Aibu to feel a bit put out by this?

Reply "Good idea! I will contribute what you contributed for me".

That's the bitch in me but, obviously you know why you were off, do others? Is this other colleague now off with something very personal and devastating and it maybe warrants a bit of moral support?

If she's taking planned sick leave, presumably it's for an operation or similar where you would normally expect a get well soon card? Obviously I don't know what illness you had but maybe they thought it wasn't appropriate?

I think you need to ascertain why she is off before getting arsey.

Your supervisor shouldn't contact you if you are signed off, surely?

@pandainmyporridge no I didn't expect contact from them at all. But there have been several messages to this other colleague via social media.

This person is off for planned minor surgery. I was off on unplanned absence for which I was also in hospital. I didn't expect a gift or card at all but now that another colleague has been treated differently I wondered why is all.

I haven't said anything to my supervisor but wanted to get other perspectives on the situation.

Don't contribute. But don't be obvious about it. Maybe.

That's really off. Some people are just adored to the point you could have a baby and they'd probably get a card for pushing out a tough poo.

InkyFANGERSlinkyFace

I'd be upset too OP, sometimes people do crap things at work and they don't realise the impact. I'd just not join in, let them come to you - if they ask then tell them but I think your silence will speak volumes. If they ask I'd just reply with "oh, I didn't think we did that" and see what they say.

I've been in the same situation. My supervisor said it's because I'm a private person and wouldn't want a fuss. For what it's worth, he was right. Could that be the case with you? I know it's horrible. Try not to let it get to you.

I haven't actually had an opportunity to contribute and the flowers and card have already been signed and sent as i see on social media (I was out of office).

I should also add that this same supervisor seems to have a personal issue with me

A colleague retired recently and I contributed towards their gift. When i asked where the card was so that I could sign it the response was "there's a card to sign for people who gave towards the gift". I thought that odd but ignored it. Then I find that this supervisor had made a "list" of people who were permitted to sign said card and I wasn't on there!! So petty.

I did confront her about that one and her response: "So did you sign the card?"

There's a really nasty, unprofessional culture in your office. It isn't coming from you.
Is there an HR department? The list sounds like a really crap thing to do, I'd probably say something unless I really couldn't afford to lose the job.
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Why do offices persist in having these collections which often only foster resentment. It's so unnecessary.

Because the supervisor is too cheap to buy a gift themselves to give to the said person.