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Original poster

OCD what helped you?

110 replies

Ocdhell · 21/10/2019 15:59

I have OCD and it’s starting to really piss me off. Does anyone have any advice or tips.

Some more info:

  • It started mildly years ago although I didn’t know it was called OCD back then (probably in my teens with checking etc)

-it got terrible after the birth of my first baby. I suffer from intrusive thoughts. Mainly surrounding harm. I was absolutely horrified about the thoughts! I have a classic case: having the thought, obsessing over it, checking behaviours/avoiding

-driving is one issue I’ve had for years. I think I could hit people in my car, the thought disturbs me, I then did behaviours like circling back to check. Now I just don’t drive.

-I avoid cooking (in case I make people sick), driving, being alone. I’m slow at work due to checking stuff. I check doors and switches. It’s bloody exhausting.

-I have had CBT which I know does help. I will try to dig out my notes from my previous sessions.

-I have several self help books

-it came back after birth of subsequent kids... but I kept it fairly under control.

-I have just had a terrible episode of it last week, I had a brief thought of “this could happen” completely out of the blue, in terms of harming strangers. Then that was it, I’m on day 6 of believing I’m a terrible person, trying to remember exactly what happened when I had the thought, I can’t remember so I maybe think I’ve done the terrible thing and blocked it out, vivid thoughts of me going to prison, a sense of doom, like it’s the last few days I have at home with my kids, wishing I could just die so the feeling could go, I want to badly go back and check etc etc.

What is next? Has anyone successfully gotten rid of OCD forever?

Has anyone had success with medication? I’m also scared of medicine and rarely take it as I always think of worst case scenario... what if I drop it and kids eat it etc etc. How ironic!

My family don’t get it. They think ocd is cleaning Sad

My husband is great and he’s been wonderful at supporting me.

My plan is:
-self help and looking after myself more
-go to gp
-get booked on for refresher course for CBT

I know I need help! I’m just after any positive stories or advice to help me before I get the help I need.

OP posts:
applesandacorns · 21/10/2019 16:15

Hey! I also suffer from the intrusive thoughts kind of OCD - it's not constant, but does occur during episodes of stress. I've seen it called 'Pure OCD' on the Internet and I recommend reading this site for more information.

When I was having my worst episode of pure OCD, I was convinced that I was going to stab my partner, stab myself, scream obscenities in public, etc.

First thing I did was go onto Fluoxetine (unbranded Prozac) for anxiety and the doctor also prescribed me Propranolol for panic attacks (it only stops physical symptoms, not mental ones, but it's surprisingly effective).

Honestly the thing that helped me was confronting my fears head on. It sounds crazy, but if I was scared I'd stab myself/my partner, I would literally stand in the kitchen, with the knife in my hand, until I felt the panic subside. If I was worried about yelling obscenities in public, I'd go and sit in the library until I knew nothing would happen. Essentially, the key to overcoming these thoughts is recognising that you do have control over your actions.

Hope this helps a bit... best wishes to you Flowers

peardrops1 · 21/10/2019 16:17

CBT helped me massively. I've done a few refresher courses, as the OCD pops up again every few years... But it feels much easier to deal with now.

charm8ed · 21/10/2019 16:19

I had 14 sessions of CBT and it completely changed and maybe even saved my life.

Original poster
Ocdhell · 21/10/2019 16:19

Thank you! I think I’m ready to try the medicine now. I wasn’t before and wanted to try CBT first but this latest episode has come out of nowhere and really frightened me! I am still only 99 percent sure I didn’t to the terrible thing I’m obsessing over. It’s ridiculous because I’m quite a logical intelligent person but this condition makes me doubt myself so much. Would not wish this on my worst enemy! It’s just horrible.

OP posts:
charm8ed · 21/10/2019 16:22

Reading through all your old notes really helped and doing any exercises your were given. I have some so do with what’s the worst thing that can happen and realistically what is likely to happen with different situations and that’s really helpful.

charm8ed · 21/10/2019 16:25

I remember saying to my therapist that OCD is a sneaky little F*** because it sneaks into your life and then takes over more and more elements of it.

Original poster
Ocdhell · 21/10/2019 16:27

Indeed. It is sneaky. What started as a “I’ll check my hair straighteners are off again” has somehow made me scared to be alone, unable to drive, unable to leave on time, underperform at work, and most worryingly made me believe in a terrible person that wants to hurt people!

OP posts:
Strangerthingshere · 21/10/2019 16:29

I find what is sneaky is that I get to grips with one thing and then it manifests itself in another area of my life.

CBT is what helps me, haven't been for a few years but if I stayed to really struggle again i would absolutely go back- get yourself to your GP and ask to be referred

charm8ed · 21/10/2019 16:30

I’m so sorry to hear this Ocdhell, do you have Time To Talk in your area? You can self refer .

charm8ed · 21/10/2019 16:35

In answer to your question in your post I think I’ve got rid of it, I don’t know about for ever.
5 years ago I never left the house on weekdays, I wouldn’t even put the wheelie bins outside. I had a few friends I saw the minimum I could to keep it going, I was suicidal, no hobbies or a job. I hated myself, I was rubbish.
Now I work part time, have lots of friends who I see at least once a week, hobbies, gym membership, a pet. This was all down to CBT.

Original poster
Ocdhell · 21/10/2019 16:36

Time to talk was brilliant last time and I managed to get driving again. My therapist was brilliant! Yes I was still nervous. But I could do it! Now the urge to avoid driving is over powering again!

OP posts:
charm8ed · 21/10/2019 16:38

Can you remember how she got you driving again if so can you try and do the stages again? Such a drive with someone next to you, or for just two minutes to start with or however you did it?

Beamur · 21/10/2019 16:42

It's horrible isn't it.
My DD has it to an extent. CBT was really helpful but I think she needs reminding of the techniques. We're working through a book with exercises in it at the moment.
Yes to all of your suggestions!
Two tiny bits of information from the book I've read so far which helped my DD

  1. Even if you don't do the neutralising act/thought to relieve the obsession it goes away anyway.
  2. People with OCD who have fears around hurting other people actually have considerably lower offending rates of violence than everyone else! Other people care a lot less than you do!
I hope you get some support as I can see how debilitating this condition is.
hayser33 · 21/10/2019 17:04

Yes I have recovered from severe pure O OCD... mine started age 14 and I didn't get help until i was 27. I didn't know I had OCD I just thought I was a sicko Confused. I was initially put on strong medication to call me down as I was a mess and then I threw myself into CBT (which did make me worse before I got better as it makes you confront the thoughts )but I got well really quickly . I still have random odd intrusive thoughts every now and then but I pay no attention to them.now and they just go away.
I firmly believe that CBT is the best thing for COD. Well it was for me Smile

Original poster
Ocdhell · 21/10/2019 17:49

Thanks all! I just booked in with time to talk again. It’s tomorrow on the phone for initial appointment.

Next, later this week I will try to get a gp appointment for some medication.

From doing the questionnaire that time to talk gave me I can tell my anxiety is much worse this time and my mood lower.

The same part of my brain is telling me to pull myself together but then the ocd just won’t stop.

I remember my last cbt and the exposure the therapy, theory a/b, ocd bully etc etc. I know it works but only if you keep at it.

I really hope it works and takes the edge of this awful anxiety I have.

What do people do about work? Has anyone told work? I lied last time and said I had a recurring physio appointment as I was embarrassed to admit to needing cbt.

OP posts:
charm8ed · 21/10/2019 18:20

Well done for contacting Time To Talk and all the best with your treatment. Well done for recognising you need help and good in you for telling the ‘bully’ to leave you alone long enough to make the appointment.
Good luck, you can do this x

Strangerthingshere · 21/10/2019 18:57

I never told my work. I do think it slowed down my productivity for a while as I felt the need to recheck a lot of things, however nobody has ever said anything. I tried to get appointments scheduled on my time off but I'm shift work rather than 9-5. Otherwise I just told them it was back physio as I've had problems with my back too so didn't come as a surprise

Original poster
Ocdhell · 22/10/2019 15:45

I had my initial appointment with time to talk. Maybe it’s the ocd but I felt like she was judging my parenting and now I’m worried they think I’m a bad parent.

Also the wait list for cbt is a year. She practically made me beg for it, she said as I’d had it before I might not be offered it again.

Also at the end I asked her if she thought anything I said made me out to be completely mad... or came across as worrying or untreatable. She said she wouldn’t answer that because its seeking reassurance which is of course ocd related.

Anyway, unfortunately I left feeling even more anxious!

OP posts:
charm8ed · 22/10/2019 15:53

So sorry to hear that, I’ve been thinking of you today.
Would be going private for a few sessions if CBT be an option?

Original poster
Ocdhell · 22/10/2019 15:56

Absolutely. Will go private. She also recommended some eye movement therapy whatever that is?! And also said cbt might not work for me until I get to the bottom of why I am the way I am eg looking at childhood.

She seemed a bit cross that I was coming back for a second round to be honest.

I’m a bit lost and now I just wait to see if I qualify for any help.

OP posts:
charm8ed · 22/10/2019 16:00

She doesn’t sound very professional, it’s quite common to need/want some more therapy, either a course or a top up session.
Did she suggest any books for you to read in the meantime or anything like that?

saraclara · 22/10/2019 16:00

My friend has OCD and when it was at its worst, he found that fluoxetine did keep it at bay.

charm8ed · 22/10/2019 16:02

One thing I found really helps with anxiety is quitting tea, coffee and sodas.

Original poster
Ocdhell · 22/10/2019 16:06

I’ll do anything at this stage! Ok coffee is gone. I’m drinking loads at moment too. Would be great if it made a difference.

Will try tablets too, when I can get an appointment!

OP posts:
Original poster
Ocdhell · 22/10/2019 16:06

And thanks! It’s great talking to people that actually get it!

OP posts:
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