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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think ibs is ruining my life

55 replies

Perpetuallyperplexed27 · 21/10/2019 15:10

I know in the grand scheme of things it's not a terrible illness. Symptoms come and go and for long periods of time I can be totally fine and symptom free. But when symptoms do appear they happen fast and it's really impacting my mental health too. I've posted about it before but had a sudden flare up on Friday. Literally left work feeling fine and went straight to the school run. On the way I started feeling a little gurgley but nothing major. By the time I got to the playground I was sweating, hopping about and desperately trying not to shit my pants! Of course ds was the last child out 🤦🏻‍♀️ made it home but it was such a close call and must have looked crazy to the other mums.

On a serious note it's experiences like that that absolutely ruin what should be nice occasions. Even if Im ok the worry of having a flare up is there. Ds has recently started playing rugby and most weekends involve a home or away game. Home is fine as we have a pavilion type building with toilets but lots of the pitches are just on playing fields with no facilities. I've missed the last few away games because I've been worried.

I take precautionary Imodium but they don't stop the anxiety and obviously don't help in situations like the school run where I've felt fine beforehand and not pre emted a problem. Sorry for the rant it just really gets me down. Anyone else?

OP posts:
Kko1986 · 21/10/2019 16:51

Hi, I have IBS have done for years.
I have omeprazole as I get bad reflux aswell and it helps. I also take a pro biotic pill one a day and I have found its improving I still have to watch what I eat but it is much better

PumpkinPie2016 · 21/10/2019 16:57

I sympathise as I have had ibs since I was a teenager. The cramps can be awful - literally take your breath away!

Apologies of you have already tried this but do certain foods make it worse? If you haven't already it may be worth keeping a diary for a couple of weeks.

I find that certain things like curries (not so much home made but say from a curry house where they use things like ghee) make it worse, fried foods and too much dairy. I only drink skimmed milk and have to take care not to eat too much yogurt/cream.

If I avoid the triggers it can be managable.

ihavenoplans · 21/10/2019 17:09

Kko1986 Which pro biotic do you take?
Sympathies, OP. IBS is so difficult to live with.

Kko1986 · 21/10/2019 17:22

Hi @ihavenoplans I take pro 30 max, its recommended that you also take pre biotic aswell which I am going to start soon

Kko1986 · 21/10/2019 17:22

Natures said pro 30 max

Original poster
Perpetuallyperplexed27 · 21/10/2019 18:00

Certain foods certainly do make it worse but there are also times when an attack has come on from nowhere. Like on Friday for example. These are the worst ones for me as there is no rhyme or reason for it and it can't be predicted, and the fear of it happening plays on my mind for weeks afterwards when I'm in places that a toilet isn't immediately accessible.

OP posts:
itsasausage · 21/10/2019 18:04

I've had an awful flare up these last 2 weeks and started trying Kefir , not expecting much especially as I'm also lactose intolerant but by day 2 the runs had stopped and no pain/bloating anything by day 3. feels like magic and I will stick with it daily.. if you havent already tried ?

Chloemol · 21/10/2019 18:24

I have colitis, and suffer the same. I do try to control by diet, but sometimes flare ups just happen. I do try to map out toilets ahead of anything I do when going out just in case, carry Imodium , have now joined the colitis uk society does got one of their cards that you can show to hopefully allow you to use a businesses loo, so perhaps at the school? I have asked before when I picked up my nephew and had to go and there was no problem

I get how you feel about concerned on going out when you don’t know what’s caused it, but have given up being precious about not asking if I can borrow a loo when I need one, it’s a quick explanation and hope they let me use it

DonKeyshot · 21/10/2019 18:47

It must be awful to be afflicted by something that can, effectively, strike without warning and you have my sympathy, OP.

No advice to give, but Aldi incontinence pants are much cheaper than other brands and do contain the 'problem' including odour as well, if not better, than more expensive versions and it may be idea to keep some handy, or wear them if you are worried about being caught short in a loo-less location

Snowy111 · 21/10/2019 18:55

I only had a short spell of IBS after my ex left, and found immodium was awful - yes it stopped it for a few hours but then it was like a tsunami once it wore off Blush

I got rid of it by giving up all caffeine and alcohol. Then gradually reintroduced

Awful though, I feel for you Flowers

cherryblossomgin · 21/10/2019 18:55

I empathize, I have IBS- C and I spend lot of time worrying about when I can take my laxatives and what I can eat on certain days. My diet is focused on my IBS and some days I am in agony and my bowels are never far from my thoughts.

I used to use bananas and eggs to stop diarrhoea. I now have to avoid them.

jamoncrumpets · 21/10/2019 18:57

Literally replying to this from the toilet. You are not alone.

bathorshower · 21/10/2019 19:04

I'm very grateful that DD's school has a toilet visitors (including parents) can use without having to ask. I've made good use of it... Any possibility your DS's school has similar?

megletthesecond · 21/10/2019 19:12

Yanbu. And mine is actually quite controlled these days but I still have to plan my days around it.
I spend way too much time in the toilet, two trips before 8am is normal. Plus more at work.
I'm too scared to step up at work as I'd need to have meetings and I'd hate having to keep going to go the loo during them.

Doingitaloneandproud · 21/10/2019 19:22

Definitely feel you! I've got IBS and my god the cramps are so painful at times! I had to cut out gluten completely as the doctors found I'm intolerant to that. I take Buscopan and laxatives which seem to be helping, but like a pp said I have to think about when to take my laxatives

It's a rubbish condition to have, there are worse ones but it's still a sh*t condition (pun intended 😂)

BIWitch · 21/10/2019 19:27

You posted about this once before - and got a lot of reports about your post as people thought you were the poo troll.

You also have another recent post about genital issues.

And now you've started a third one!

Did you not do anything with the advice you were given on your first IBS thread?

jgjgjgjgjg · 21/10/2019 19:36

Why on earth didn't you just go to the reception at school and explain that you suffer from IBS and urgently needed the toilet?? Rather than standing in the playground about to poo yourself?? The same with business meetings at work - just say upfront that you have some heath issues that mean you might need to take a comfort break at short notice. I get that it might be embarrassing but surely a much better option letting IBS rule your life?

IHaveBrilloHair · 21/10/2019 19:42

I have it too, it's awful.
Buscopan is great for the cramps, Imodium just in case, but the only thing that really works for me when I have to be somewhere is not eating.

FunOnTheBeach20 · 21/10/2019 19:46

I feel you.

I have IBS and have done since I was 12. Unfortunately I have actually shit myself on a couple of occasions. I haven’t done so for 4 years or so I seem to have it under better control. What’s really annoying is I’m intolerant to wheat, I’ve never been tested for celiac as my symptoms cleared as soon as I stopped eating wheat (over a decade and a half ago!) so eating it for several weeks to test seemed pointless. When I tell people I’m wheat intolerant they all think it’s a fad. It’s not, I eat wheat, I quite literally shit myself, ok so it doesn’t kill me but it’s still not an acceptable symptom or something worth mocking.

Rant over, it’s a pain and getting anxious about it makes it worse. I get it when I’m anxious too. My DH understands when I say I need an “urgent poo”. Even when I’m well I don’t have much time to get to the bathroom.

Original poster
Perpetuallyperplexed27 · 21/10/2019 21:30

@BIWitch I said that I'd posted about this before. And yes I do have another health issue going on at the minute. I'm having a pretty rubbish time right now! Thanks for flagging that up though, nice to see that you've taken the time to trawl through my back catalogue of posts.

This isn't about getting advice on how to manage it as such. I've tried many things already and in any case IBS and their treatments effect people differently. It's more about talking about it because I feel too embarrassed to discuss in irl. It really saddens me that even on an anonymous forum people have to assume the worst and make a taboo subject feel even more sordid and disgusting.

I don't know if the school has an accessible toilet that parents can use. I suppose it does but I was waiting for my ds to come out any minute.

OP posts:
BIWitch · 21/10/2019 21:33

But @Perpetuallyperplexed27 you know that MN is plagued with trolls, many of whom get off on exactly the stuff you're posting - and it was explained on your other IBS thread!

I appreciate you may want to talk about it, but these kind of posts simply encourage other posters to add their own, often graphic stories - which is exactly what the trolls want.

BIWitch · 21/10/2019 21:34

... and I Advance Searched you for the very reason that I thought you might be the poo troll Hmm

Original poster
Perpetuallyperplexed27 · 21/10/2019 21:40

Regardless @BIWitch I still think that the opportunity for people who suffer with this daily to talk about it with other people who are experiencing similar should take priority over the slim fact that some 'poo troll' is getting off on stories about it. Seriously if you look at the general population I'm pretty sure that there are a lot more ibs sufferers than there are poo fiends...

It's sad how people's minds have to jump to the weirdest conclusions. If you genuinely have concerns then either don't reply or report to MN who will no doubt look into it and clarify that I'm a genuine poster...🙄

OP posts:
1Morewineplease · 21/10/2019 21:41

I have IBS and feel for you. It controls you. Imodium doesn’t work. You need to go to GP. Mebeverine might help. Have you had an endoscopy?
It sucks. Has prevented me from working. Wish I could turn it off.

Original poster
Perpetuallyperplexed27 · 21/10/2019 21:42

My symptoms are mostly sporadic so I've never been on long term medication. I use Imodium when I have a flare up. It's the sheer unpredictability of an attack and the mental effect that can have on you that causes the anxiety :(

OP posts:
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