To ask my heavily pregnant friend to watch the dd's for me?

[vwvic]

My friend and her dp (dh's cousin) asked dh to fit their kitchen for them a little while ago. Dh has loads of experience doing this, and as she is due to give birth to their first baby at the end of August agreed. He had a look and said that they needed to do all the preparatory work before it was delivered.

Last week, cousin called and said the kitchen had arrived, and could dh do it at the weekend. It hasn't gone smoothly as they didn't do much preparatory work, so dh has had to do it himself before he could even start on fitting. Consequently, it's taken much longer to get finished- dh thinks it won't be until after this weekend.

The problem is that I need to go shopping for my dd1's birthday presents this weekend, and I have no-one else who could babysit. I wouldn't expect my friend to do anything other than sit on the sofa and watch dvds with the girls, as it will only be for about 2 hours in the afternoon. Am I being unreasonable to ask her?

It rather depends on how her pregnancy is going and how she is feeling. Is there no other time you can go shopping?

It depends if she is OK. Personally, when I was heavily pregnant, I would not have been able to manage. Some people are fine though so it just depends. Also depends on the ages of your DDs and if they really will stay still!

i wouldn't ask...she has half a kitchen by the sounds of it and is ready to pop!

Her pregnancy is going well, and AFAIK she's feeling pretty good. She's started her maternity leave, and is making the most of her free time visiting friends for lunch, having coffee out, that sort of thing.

Unfortunately I can't go shopping at any other time- all my friends work full time or have to much on their plate to be able to take on my two even for a short while. Grandparents aren't an option either.

I suppose I just feel that if they'd done the work dh asked them to before the kitchen arrived then he would have had it finished last weekend. So, in a way I think it's fair enough to make up for inconveniencing us. On the other hand I do feel a bit guilty for asking as I'm not sure I would like to do it if I was her.

Ask her and make it clear that it is a request that you are happy for her to reject.

I'm sure a good friend will tell you what they really think.

could you not shop online today with next day delivery?

Blimey, it took me long time to type that!

My dd's are 7 (soon to be 8) and nearly 6. I'm pretty sure they'll stay still as they get to watch hardly any tv, so consequently when they do, thy're riveted! I'm also going to bribe them heavily with popcorn, drinks etc laid out on the table.

At the moment their house isn't habitable as they have no kitchen! They are borrowing a house from cousins' parents.

I am heavily pregnant and I am now looking after 2 other children along with my DD, which is why I'm on MN now!
If you're both good friends and have been helping each other out in one way or another, I think its reasonable to ask her if its OK explaining your situation but making it clear that she has every right to say 'no'.

Ah, thought of that already. I've done as much as possible online, but to be honest, I just can't afford it, and so need to go and raid the discount shops!

sorry, that was to countess dracula.

GD, I think that's what I'm going to do.

ask her and let her do it at your house, make a nice meal i am sure she would like a home form home for a bit that isnt full of dust and dirt

depends on whether she is well. how well behaved your dd's are likley to be. and how good a friend she really is.

I think given their ages, and given that they are girls (!) you are not being unreasonable -it sounds like they wouldn't be too much trouble.

I wouldn't though ask her to "babysit" my DS1 who is 3, and his 9 month old brother!

At your dds ages, they would be pretty self-sufficient for a couple of hours, and it's not like they would want to go to the park to kick a football!

That was my thinking hotbot. I'm probably stressing about nothing.

We're really good friends- she's even asked me to be her birth partner.

I really don't think the girls will be any trouble at all- they really will be glued to their favorite film. They are both capable of sorting themselves out if need be, especially if I provide snacks/drinks and lay them out on the table. Added to this they are both really kind kids- they cluck and fuss my dh when he comes in from work, offering foot massages, shoulder rubs, drinks, newspapers, cushions- you name it. So I think it's highly likely she'll get pampered if she agrees!

I'm sure she'll be fine. Plenty of people have to look after other children when pregnant. Ask, say she can say no and leave your phone on so you can get back quickly if need be.

If she's feeling okay, you could ask her. It would only be for a little while. You could also bring her a nice cake or chocolates back from the shops.

i guess you can ony know by asking her really. if they will be glued to the tv rather than runnig around its different!

When I was heavily pregnant I wouldn't have minded loving after someone's children.

I don't think you are being unreasonable at all.