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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU by saying no to looking after the 'outdoor cat' which I've just been informed will be staying with the house for 'a few weeks' after completion?

193 replies

ExchangedCat · 17/10/2019 20:04

Having recently exchanged the seller has been in touch to say they're taking all the pets except their 'outdoor cat' and could we look after it got a few weeks until they're settled?

We won't be moving in fully for the first few weeks as the house and garden need a fair bit of work. I'm also slightly worried that we have no idea where the cat is given the neglected state of the garden.

Voting:
YANBU - say no to the cat
YABU - say yes to the cat

OP posts:
catyrosetom2 · 17/10/2019 20:26

If you were moving in, putting some biscuits outside twice a day for an outdoor cat wouldn’t be difficult. However you aren’t moving in, so I you can’t easily do this. To give the previous owners the benefit of the doubt (as an outdoor cat owner) the reason could to do with the cat not being likely to settle well on the day of the move, with so much going on, when they won’t gave time to spend with it helping it do so.

NoSquirrels · 17/10/2019 20:29

I think you have to say no, because you’re not moving in immediately, and then ask them what the issue is with moving the outdoor cat?

AdoraBell · 17/10/2019 20:39

WTF? No, YANBU.

If needed you can borrow my German Sheperds. Otherwise, put some orange/any citrus peel with a few drops of eucalyptus essential oil dotted around the garden. It will not harm the cat but will deter it.

Original poster
ExchangedCat · 17/10/2019 20:40

Thank you for all the replies.

The seller is moving in with relatives for a couple of weeks until their new property is ready. They first told us this a couple of weeks ago but, at no point in the whole process have they even mentioned owning a cat, until after we exchanged yesterday.

It isn't a local move for either party, we're both moving a couple of counties or so in different directions.

I'm not without sympathy for either seller or cat, but this whole process has been lengthy and stressful and I feel like I'm already at my limits.

OP posts:
Dontcarewhatimdoing · 17/10/2019 20:43

I'd agree you should say no, but realistically if they leave the cat, there is not gong to be a lot you can do about it, so you need to be prepared for the fact that whatever you say, you may have to deal with the cat when you move in.

Disfordarkchocolate · 17/10/2019 20:45

I'd be very concerned that they were actually abandoning the cat. I'm so allergic to cats there's no way I would look after even an outdoor cat. Also, what happens if the cat is ill or goes missing?

MeggyMeg · 17/10/2019 20:46

No. What happens if the car needed veterinary care ? It's not your responsibility.

Booboostwo · 17/10/2019 20:46

Aside from all the other reasons this is a bad idea, new owners who are not around all the time plus the noise and disruption of the building work might spook the cat and make it run away.

They should take their cat with them and if they can’t catch it the the CPL can lend them a cat trap.

DontCallMeShitley · 17/10/2019 20:46

Agree, you need to find out more about the cat, if it is a feral or a cat they don't allow inside.

Chances are they don't want the poor cat and are hoping you will take it on.

Aridane · 17/10/2019 20:48

Ha - I would make No Fucking Cat completion condition!

catpyjamas · 17/10/2019 20:49

If they're moving counties away, are they really going to come back for the cat? I can't imagine leaving my cat behind and telling some stranger 'I'll collect it later at an undisclosed time'.

What if the cat becomes ill? Or lost? Or there is an accident? Who is responsible?
OP if you do not want to adopt this cat, please say 'no'. The cat deserves a home where it will be loved and looked after. There is likely a rescue somewhere in the area. Phone them. If the owner leaves without their cat then I would think it would be considered abondoned.

LonginesPrime · 17/10/2019 20:50

at no point in the whole process have they even mentioned owning a cat, until after we exchanged yesterday.

That's really bad - so instead of coming up with a plan for caring for their pet, like a cattery, friend, neighbour, etc, they waited until you'd exchanged them made it your problem? Not ok at all and I would be talking to the estate agent/solicitor ASAP.

I would say no to them and then call the RSPCA if they leave it anyway.

HattieBugatti · 17/10/2019 20:51

@ExchangedCat

My heart says 'yeaaaaah, it won't hurt to look after the wee cutie!'

And I chose YABU.

BUTTTT.

My head says 'no!' Because kittie should not be your responsibility and if something happens to her/him, YOU will be blamed.

SOOOO. I changed it to YANBU.

Happy new house. Flowers

Crinkle77 · 17/10/2019 20:51

I suspect they'll just leave it anyway. You're going to be lumbered with it either way.

Babybel90 · 17/10/2019 20:52

No way, that’s so cheeky of them! They’ve waited until you’ve exchanged so you feel like you’ve got no choice!

I hate cats, I’m not allergic or anything, I just don’t like the scratchy smelly things so there’s no way I’d be doing anything to care for a cat, I’ve even covered my garden fence in anti-cat spikes and got 2 noise things because my neighbour has about a dozen cats and they all like to use my garden as a giant litter tray.

Iwantmychairback · 17/10/2019 20:56

This happened to us too when we bought a house.
To be honest, I was hoping they didn’t come back for him, but he was collected a couple of days later.

PeonyTruffle · 17/10/2019 20:56

YANBU

you can't move and leave a bloody cat behind, outdoor one or not!

Slappadabass · 17/10/2019 20:58

Sounds to me like they want rid of the cat and won't bother coming back for it. I love my cats to bits and wouldn't dream of leaving them in the care of a stranger!
If you don't feel comfortable saying no outright tell them you have a big dog that hates cats so it's not possible.

Floralnomad · 17/10/2019 20:59

YANBU , however they are probably going to leave it anyhow .

raspberryk · 17/10/2019 20:59

My cat went AWOL in moving week and my brother ended up going to get her for me from the old place when she was howling and scratching the door down in the night after we had moved.

SAY NO

IncrediblySadToo · 17/10/2019 21:04

Aww think of the cat... it can’t go into a cattery or a strange house. 😿

However, if you’re really not going to be there each day, then could you let a neighbour or friend feed it (she’ll need to ask the neighbours/friends)

It’s an outdoor cat, would it hurt to be kind?!

I’m sure they’ll come for it once they’ve settled in their new place.

LonginesPrime · 17/10/2019 21:06

Aww think of the cat... it can’t go into a cattery or a strange house

Erm, I hate to break it to you, but it's owners are moving and leaving it behind with strangers!

Mirrors123 · 17/10/2019 21:06

They are definitely doing this to get rid of their cat. I've known people who have wanted to get rid of their cat when they moved and done exactly this!!

userabcname · 17/10/2019 21:07

Yanbu. This exact thing happened on my road. The new owner agreed to put cat food down but took no more responsibility. When the owners eventually returned for the cat, it was nowhere to be found. They were upset and new owner didn't care (why would he?). No idea what became of the cat.

ClemDanFango · 17/10/2019 21:10

They’re taking the utter piss out of you, waiting until after exchange to ask is pure manipulation, they’re trying to make you feel you have no choice. You do, say NO.

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