AIBU to let DD (10) have her own free time more often?

[Funkyslippers]

DD2 (10, year 6) and I have always spent quite a bit of time together, maybe because she's my 'baby' as I feel it's really important to have that 1 to 1 time. However recently she's been more interested in doing her own thing, for example I let her have about an hour or so screen time when she gets in from school, then she'll generally call on a friend or invite one over. I feel lately I've hardly seen her apart from at dinner time, watching tv and bed time when we read together. We still also sit and chat about our day. If I ask to spend some time with her (eg to play a game or do a puzzle) she never seems particularly keen. I just feel guilty for not spending alot of quality time with her but don't want to force her. I'm also secretly quite liking having a bit more tijme to myself! AIBU? How much 1 to 1 time would you spend with a child around that age?

Let her do her thing. You have reading and chat time, so she could ask for more time with you if she wants it. Perhaps arrange with her to go out for coffee, or something that sounds and feels grown up.

Very little.

Mealtimes especially weekends.

Bedtime.

Watching the TV for a bit.

Going out sometimes.

But mostly they did their own thing

@Funkyslippers it's a time where this begins to happen, very normal. But of course you want to maintain a close relationship so want a balance - respect her desire to do her own thing and be with friends, and continue to build trust, space, time together. I'd say go for that balance - maybe dinner times and the last hour of the day are for family time (reading, chatting, a game) and have a family evening one evening at the weekend - games, a film etc? Also we make Sundays family day and while Saturday I do not much more than taxi my children to activities and friends, and our home is full of tweens and teens, Sundays are for family time - a walk, visit a park or National Trust property, art work together, extra reading, afternoon film snuggled under duvet.

By respecting her changing needs and wants she won't view you as holding her back, but by also making sure she does have that special time it means you are still sending important messages and keeping relationship strong so that when there are the things that will come up with peers, school etc., she still has that strong bond.

It's a new stage and yes it can be nice to suddenly have a bit of time to read or relax!

She's growing up. This is completely normal.

Mine is the same . Enjoy it .your still there and she will still need the cuddles love and attention when she has a row with a friend or is feeling unsure . It’s like the second toddler stage . They start wandering without you buy every so often run back !