to be afraid of my gander😱

[Tinkerbell456]

Anyone own a gander? We have six geese that we got at the age of around 12 months about a year ago. Unknowingly one turned out to be a gander. So they are now about two, and being spring, here in Oz it’s their first breeding season. Well, the girls are nesting and he’s very aggressive. Does it stop after breeding season? Any remedies that don’t involve roast potato’s and stuffing?

@TakemedowntoPotatoCity I thought this was an anti feminist thread

There’s a brilliant goose simulator game (we’ve got it for the Switch) but you are a bastard goose who trashes gardens and winds up the villagers. It’s brilliant!

That's the one, @CustardOmlet!

Think I need an eye test

Thought it said to be afraid of my GARDENER

I don't think YABU as it goes . As many have said they can be, and are, used instead of guard dogs .

They cross the road from Homebase pond to the green by a church opposite . There have been gosling fatalities sadly :(

@BilboBercow me too.

@ CustardOmlet ooohh what game is this ?

My aunt had a pair of geese (M&F) when I was a child, Victoria & Albert. They were psychotic.

DoctorTwo

My DDad was a keen walker. He once got attacked by a gander whilst out. He used an open umbrella as a shield. The fucking psycho goose managed to rip it out of his hand and stomped on it until it broke all the ribs of the umbrella. That did satisfy its insane rage and my Dad brought the brolly back to show us. It was covered in muddy webbed footprints.

@ChazsBrilliantAttitude (not actually shocked but that is the closest emoji)

FizzyIce it's linked on page 3!

There’s a brilliant goose simulator game (we’ve got it for the Switch) but you are a bastard goose who trashes gardens and winds up the villagers. It’s brilliant!

Oooo my youngest son is getting a Switch for Christmas . What's the game called please ? If he don't like it, I would .

That thread is making me howl . My particular fave being that geese are the Peaky Blinders of the animal world - ‘like ducks with flick knives’

SleepyKat Canada geese are highly intelligent, if you talk to them, or take a small amount of food, they will remember you and not attack.
We had local boys killing goslings on the towpath, it was absolutely horrible, they also get hit by bikes, so do give a warning if they are stressed by someone coming too close.

I am really laughing at the umbrella.

We used to have some, and they were fierce at guarding the house. Dad taught us to throw food to distract them if they got too near, but I was always very afraid of them. Dad killed the gander for Christmas, even though we hated them my sister and I refused to talk to Dad for months......... let alone eat the poor sod.

This is the funniest thread I've read in ages! The croquet mallet has me howling!

Best. Description. Ever.

Cobra chicken

You are brave! I wouldn't have kept the gander. They are scary 🤪

It's his house now. You may as well just leave.

The Romans used them as guard dogs. I have no idea as how to go about being the dominant goose.

I have an ASBO gander who used to lie in wait for me at the front door and beat me up during the 10m from door to car. He now lives in a special enclosure for naughty boys. I love him dearly and would never part with him - sadly he does not love me back.

There is a book in which a gander is used as a murder weapon...

I got holed up by a gander in a stable for 2 hours once until I was rescued by the owner. He was called Squeak which was far too nice a name for him ...

Their nip! They have serrated beaks they grab and twist. It really hurts and leaves a bruise.

And a Cockerel chased me up a ladder once.

They never give up. Fend him off with a broom, OP

What about hoisin sauce? Geese are utter cunts. We had a long horse lunging whip.. didn’t whip them just bonked them with the stick part so you had time to run from hissy mcbitey.

Our worst one was a goat, you never bent down just never expose your arse to something that can aim it’s horns 😂. He also bit legs/fingers.. broke into the house if the door wasn’t locked. Neighbours must’ve thought we were mental screaming like nuts at silly o’clock because someone hadn’t locked the fucking door and now psycho goat was in the kitchen. Wasn’t so bad finding him during the day.. but the fear of that bugger cornering you in the loo was real.

I genuinely love this and the old thread!

Devil chicken