my DH is from a South Asian culture and his parents are very traditional. They are also extremely wealthy. They have NEVER lifted a single finger to help my DH. He has struggled through clinical depression and the myriad ways in which they’ve fucked him up, including both bullying him and teaching him to behave like a bully. Their biggest fear is that we divorce because of the ‘dishonour’ and we were headed that way in the past. They treat the fact that I’ve stayed as a personal triumph although I’ve only considered my children’s well-being in my decisions. They encouraged him not to take his medications, they caused fights between us by complaining about me behind my back, they’ve outright lied to each of us about what the other has said. They insult me, my looks, my culture and my family to my face then plead ‘misunderstandings’ and ‘language barriers’. I keep contact minimal and civil, which offends them greatly. My DH is of course free to choose his level of contact with them.
DH was just made redundant. At what is already a stressful time I’ve now had 2 20 minute phone calls from PIL to remind me;
- a wife’s duty is to support her husband, irrespective of the fact that I’m the only one who has supported him day in and day out
- making grandiose statements about their finances and all the help they could offer us if they chose to (they love to boast but the help never materialised)
- how God is testing me. Pardon me, I thought the test was dealing with a clinically depressed DH and two children under 3 on a tiny income whilst his family refused to help
I know it’s a fraught time for everyone but WIBU to tell them to go fuck themselves? At length?