Is DP a CF or AIBU? Money

[MeOrDP]

I live in rented accommodation with my DP and our two DC. I work PT as our youngest is just 6months and DP worked full time until he got the sack a few weeks ago. He had an argument with a colleague, both raised their voices and foul language was used. Disciplinary - dismissed.

The way we did things would be for DP to pay the rent and I would pay the bills, food, kids stuff, sky, gas, electric - everything else.

We always kept our finances separate, no joint account. Both happy with that.

No savings unfortunately, living quite close to the breadline. His wages were NMW and mine are just above.

DP received his final payment from work after being dismissed and it was £200 short of the rent. I offered to add the £200 but said I need it back as soon as he gets work because it had come from living expenses needed for utilities etc.

Meanwhile he gets a job interview then trial day and it all looks positive, just waiting to hear back.

He got some cash in hand work from a friend today, gets given a sum in cash (don't know how much yet as he's not home but at least £100 - three separate jobs with his friend in a day so he's been busy) and he texts me to say he's been tipped £30 and the £30 is all mine.

So basically he's wanting to keep the cash in hand money to himself for god knows what despite owing me £200 that i need to spend on utilities groceries etc, whilst I continue to carry him and pay for everything - but I can have the £30 tip.

AIBU or is he being a CF

If he's that 'bad with money' the answer is simple, joint account for bills his wages go in there as do yours, bills are paid, if anything left over you get a little spending money each back in your personal accounts, fun things are not paid for from the joint account.

Yes but you going PT surely facilitates his ability to work FT? So if you werent going PT he'd be paying nusery fees 2.5 days per week? Instead you are covering that cost at the expense of your career progression and pension? That's why it make sense to pool money. Mind you i wouldnt wanna tie myself up financially with somome who is bad with money. It sounds like he sees kids as your expense.

I think regardless of this specific situation, from what you've said a PP is right:

He seems to have turned you into the 'responsible' one who makes sure everything gets paid while he behaves like a child, trying to get out of doing his share. An adult should make themselves equally responsible.

It's so stressful having to be the safety net, I feel for you and hope you can turn it around

So did he give you the £50 he earned last week?

He’s spoofing over the details about this week’s work/wages btw. He’s wanting to keep some secret money for himself.