To ask about the tightest person you've ever met

[GunpowderGelatine]

I'm not talking about skint people, frugal people or those doing good for the environment - but who have you met who is the biggest tightwad without the need to be tight?

Mine is my mum unfortunately. She's just been for a week-long visit and I swear she gets worse with age (though she's not even 60 so not old). She's well off enough that she retired aged 47, hasn't had a mortgage since 2002 and her husband earns a very good living. She wears designer clothes and has lovely jewellery, so I don't think she's secretly skint or anything.

We went shopping in town one day during her visit and both got the odd thing from places like Primark, Superdrug etc ie nothing expensive. Because I had DS in the pram which is awkward round small and busy aisles, when coming to pay one of us took the others' stuff up with them to pay whilst the other one of us waited by the doors with the pram. Stuff we bought cost us each no more than a fiver altogether. We then went for lunch in M&S, mum got a table whilst I went up with a tray, got toasties and coffees and paid then and there. Cost about £19 for the 3 of us to eat and drink.

At the end of the day I figured we were probably even in what we'd paid for and I would've said nothing more about it. However 10 minutes after getting home she presented me with 3 receipts for places where she'd gone up to pay for stuff, with my stuff highlighted (she must've brought a highlighter with her as I don't have one in the house 🤣) and the amounts written on - the amounts were £2.99, £2.62 and £1.49

She then said she wanted to "treat us all" to the cinema as the kids wanted to see the Lion King. So off we went, I packed some mini bags of popcorn from M&S and some bottled drinks as otherwise I'd be spending around £20+ for the equivalent in the cinema. I packed enough for everyone (this is allowed in our cinema). When we went to buy the tickets, she bunged me a fiver (the cost of her ticket) - so much for treating us! And then I thought we were going into the cinema but to my surprise she proceeded to get a large popcorn, large coke, a hot dog and Maltesers for herself. Which cost her £16.99. We had to all carry something as she had so much 😂 I was and thought it's a good job I have a sense of humour. She then wouldn't let my kids have some of her maltesers because "your popcorn is enough you'll get sick" - and then left a half full packet on her chair at the end

I don't think I've ever known such a tightwad! She's like this with other people - she gives her elderly neighbour a lift to the supermarket when she goes, and takes petrol money off her! Even though she's going anyway.

And no I didn't ask for money for lunch and what I paid for in shops, or for lunch, because i refuse to be like that. I also didn't want to mention about her treating us at the cinema because she'd no doubt say something passive aggressive like "oh I didn't know you were skint" 🙄

Cheer me up please by regaling me with your best tightwad stories!

We bought a house and when we moved in, before we did anything else we had to go and buy a load of light bulbs because although we had purchased the light fittings on the contract apparently we hadn’t stated we wanted the light bulbs as well.

We were left with 1 light bulb in a 4 bed detached house.

A couple of days later the couple we had bought the house off made the 32 mile round trip to collect the bulb.

They thought they had been more than generous not leaving us without light and not charging us for the couple of days use of the singular light bulb

"For some very rich people, being tight and completely focused on money above all else is how they got very rich in the first place."

I don't know. You'd have to re-use a LOT of teabags to become a millionaire.
I do know someone who has never in his life bought toilet roll as he just takes them from work. Over a lifetime, that probably does save thousands.

My mother bought a large house.

It was beautiful and after years of living in a building site in other houses we moved into this house that was in turn key condition.

My mother bought a caravan and instead of moving into the house we lived for years in the caravan in the garden because it was cheaper than living in the house.

Jesus Christ, some of these are shocking. I honestly had no idea people were so tight!

My DP is notoriously tight. It nearly split us up in the beginning-until I pointed out to him that it was hugely unattractive.

His family were very poor when he was growing up so it is rooted in that but people that don't know him well wouldn't know that, and although he earns a lot now and has got much better at shaking the dust off his wallet, it can sometimes still emerge and I have to point out to him how it's coming across.

He once spent an hour and 25 mins trying to get a refund from his electricity bill -on the phone to the call centre. The refund was for £2.47. He earned about 80k a year at the time. The call probably cost more than the refund. And it nearly cost him me

A friend of a friend got married in NYC, invited loads of people back to their swanky hotel. No drinks or food, all sat there awkwardly. The guests had to pay for room service a drinks.

"He has his dad cut his hair to
Save £6 at the barbers

what's wrong with that?"

I find that quite normal for people with a basic hairdo as well. My granddad got his hair cut by his sister. He and my grandmother never, ever, ever eat out, but that was quite normal for people of their generation. Frugality rather than tightness.

The woman who had a sink wash unless she wanted to wash her hair - I see no problem with that either and what we should all be doing to save resources.

I feel totally differently about people who make others suffer by refusing to put heating or light on.

Can’t believe I forgot my old boss! She was a complete dragon and very wealthy but alarmingly tight...hen day very wealthy. She changed the office teabags to value ones and monitored everything including her own food intake to consume as little as possible and save money. My utter favourite, was after an entire year of her verbal abuse and slave driving, Christmas arrived.

Normally she didn’t do anything but this year she was evidently feeling she should. There were three of us and we each got a lavender M&S soap; she had divided a multipack up quite clearly, but not only that, they were something from about a decade ago that your nan would have in a drawer. It was an insult to be honest and we all agreed we would have sooner she hadn’t bothered than rummaged in her cupboard for an unwanted gift and split it three ways

A friend used to come for dinner weekly. I provided all food and drink and each week she would say that she would invite me to hers for a meal sometime but never did. After months of this, another friend invited her for a meal. First friend told me she accepts all invitations “after all it’s a free meal”.
I stopped inviting her after that.

" I do hate rounds though. We aren't big drinkers (so I tend to have a soda and lime, or just alternate an alcoholic and soft drink each time) so it feels like a bit of a sting, especially when a few people are drinking big glasses of naice wine.

Same goes for splitting bills. I'd never say anything but when DH and I are having veggie meals and water, and have to split with a couple who have steak and wine...then drop them off because I'm designated driver, I feel a bit hmm Puts me off eating out!"

Agree with both of these things, but the splitting bills thing is not refusing to pay your part it's more the ones who've had bigger meals expecting the others to subsidise them.

Lemonysnicketts
My old boss was lovely.

At Easter we all got Easter Eggs put on our desk and any high day and holiday we got presents.
Every Friday we would order a takeaway from the nearest town and she would drive and a couple of us would run in to collect the order.

Think I put on about a stone just working there.

A friends Dad. He was a padre in the RAF (Officer status) so wasn't scrimping for money. We went round for a roast dinner and he served us our food, he measured everything even the peas. I kid you not, he measured the peas!!! Long standing joke in my family

@breakfastpizza

A co-worker's mum died in her 80s. She was single, on benefits, lived in council housing. Worked as a cleaner most of her life. Was a WOC immigrant who arrived in this country with nothing. My friend was a lovely daughter to her, fussed over her, always driving her and paying for her groceries, buying her treats.

When she died they found that she owned MULTIPLE houses (at least 3). In London. She's been buying them for years on the sly and renting them out. It was a huge nightmare because she'd been claiming benefits without declaring it.

What does her being a woman of colour and an immigrant got to do with it? You’re a bigot.

I often get annoyed with splitting bills too as I usually have to drive as I live quite a distance away. Others will order bottles of wine and merrily suggest we just split equally.
I was once out with friends who had ordered 2 bottles of wine between 3 of them. I ordered a dessert and a coke to go with my meal so was perfectly happy to split the bill as while they had spent a little more it was fairly equal. They split the majority of the bill and added my dedsert on to my share as I had been the only person to order one. In their words other than that we've all had dinner and a drink so it wouldn't be fair if we paid for your dessert. I haven't been out with them since.

My aunt's new husband is so wealthy he had no idea what his assets are he has his fingers in sooo many pies. They have recently been to India for so month because she wanted too for s honeymoon but he is a skin flint. he will use a tea bag for 3 teas then throw out. They came to visit my grandmother and went from Norfolk to Liverpool it cost him £8 for both of them ( they both own cars and drive) he used their bus passes to travel to areas that they were valid for free travel but a 4 hour car trip ish was a 18 hour bus/train travel I tbo don't think it's worth it

@limpylegs and @Luckybe40 My mum is a narcissist. Nothings ever her fault and it's always "but what about ME?!"

The best one had to be at age 14. My Kickers school shoe sole completely fell off. It wasn't even a case of talking shoes that flapped at the front. The whole sole pulled off. Understandable seeing that they were my friend's old school shoes so were already old and tatty when I got them.

I got home shoeless and told mum in a panic that I needed new shoes ASAP. (Strict dress code for my Catholic school.) she told me to glue them back together. I told her I couldn't, they were knackered and besides, we had no glue.

Her answer? "Ugh. Well I dunno! Sellotape them!!"

That would have been a great look for a 14yo right? Sellotaped shoes.

Thankfully a friend gave me a pair.

Mum's always had ponies. They come first. Always. They got new rugs, fed on time every single day with the best stuff. Regular blacksmith visits to keep their feet pretty. Fresh, clean stables every day. DSis and I got nothing because mum "couldn't afford it!" Well no, not when you're paying a few hundred quid a week out for a dozen useless pets too small to even ride.

We're not NC though. I'm a mum myself and my kids come first. They may not have the latest name brand clothes but what they do have are lots of clothes that fit them properly and they get meals every single day. Good meals too. They know what Gran is like. She does love me and isn't as tight as she used to be but the damn ponies do still come first.

My dad refuses to pay for parking, he won't even let us offer to pay. Once when we went to a concert he parked miles away from the venue, my feet where blistered by the time I got to the venue.

The next day I checked the distance on Google maps and from where he parked to the venue, was further a distance than what it would have been if we just walked to the concert from our house.

So sad that some decide to live their lives on the backs of others, or are miserable and cold to save a penny here and there.

I know one of them. A wealthy woman who inherited her father's business and promptly sold it for a few million. I have never seen that woman put her hand in her purse to buy a drink in company when everyone else does so and includes her. These people have balls of steel, or are just a little messed up in the head, sorry if that offends.

I think a lot of it boils down to insecurity, and having lots of money makes them feel secure, but damned if they will ever share!

I have ditched every single person who was like that. And told them to their face too. The satisfaction was worth every penny I had every spent over and above their skinflinty ways. They need to be called out. it can be done in a jokey way, and once one person says it, everyone else feels they can call them out too. Try it!

But mark my words they will never change, however they need not be part of your life and leech off you either. No wonder so many examples above are "ex" now lol.

Meanness and being a tightwad in company (I don't care what they do in their own lives without me) has to be one of the worst traits in a person. Well it is.

Dh had a friend who was rudely tight. At one ridiculous meal he ordered lobster and expensive wine, so when it got to me I ordered mine and then said "Can I have a separate bill please?" The server asked if we all wanted separate bills and everyone said yes. He was absolutely fuming and actually said out loud that he wouldn't have ordered the lobster had he known. Another friend picked him up on it and said "Are you actually saying you picked something because you knew the other 11 people at the table would subsidise it?"

The group have an annual BBQ and after grumbling that the 'host' should cover the costs and it being pointed out that the person whose garden it was in was having it there because the old park they used to use was closed so they weren't actually 'hosting' he agreed to bring the buns for the burgers and hot dogs. For a BBQ with approx 50 people - inc him, his wife, their 4 kids and his parents - he brought 6 burger buns and 6 hotdog buns.

Thankfully after an incident over a mutual friend's 50th he is no longer part of the group. They all spent the same on 50th presents - chipping together and buying something good. He actually complained at the plan to do the same for a friend who was terminally ill. And uttered the actual words "But what will happened to it when he dies"

My ex. Used to invite his family over for Sunday lunch then charge them. Whenever we were out and about he 'left his wallet at home' so I had to pay for everything. He would never share finances or have a joint pot as he liked to hoard all his savings to himself.

I have ditched every single person who was like that. And told them to their face too.

Yep! There was never a second time or even a first because when I was young I was quite poor, I literally could not magic up the money to pay for a CFer. And having been so poor, I can tell you, tightwad behaviour is nearly never poor people doing it, when you're truly on the bones of your arse you tend to avoid even going out in case you might to be expected to pay out more than you possibly can.

They get away with it because people don't call them out. It's not confrontational or rude or unkind to do so, quite the contrary. Or you invite them to do non-monetary things like go for a walk or meet at a park or, like the poster whose aunt always forgets her purse, leave her in the car. If they balk, you just tell them, well I can't do anything involving money with you because you always try to skive out of paying your share and it's not the job of the universe to subsidise your life.

A so-called friend tried this with me at uni and I literally did not have the money in my account to cover her ticket. If I hadn't enough for me, I wouldn't have gone and here she was having the nerve to get affronted with me after showing up with 'oops, forgot my purse' so I said, that's a pity, shall we go for a walk instead (this was before mobiles and banking apps) that I wasn't going to 'just spot' her. I didn't have the money! Come to find out from others she forgot her purse all the time.

My mother. She gave her nephew 3 small bottles of steak marinade and a brush kit... for his wedding.

Housemate years ago. He thought that the other girl and I should pay more towards the household shopping bill because we used more toilet paper, being female.
Luckily the other lass was his girlfriend and told him what she thought of that idea, backed up by me and the other lads, and he rapidly bucked up his ideas - but not until we had too many arguments over bloke poo and its wipeability...

PIL, they have never once bought their only grandchild anything. MIL and FIL have been several times on expensive holidays to USA, Canada, cruises etc . They have spent hundreds of pounds on those display dolls and costumes for the dolls. At Christmas, DS got a £1 coin taped inside a card. She goes to the hairdresser every week, which costs £100 approx a month and a generous tip.

FIL hasn't worked on the books for years. Neither has MIL. They worked for well off friends. FIL on busy events and MIL every weekend and a few shifts a week. When they went away they'd give her £500 for watching the place. All cash in hand.

Well, PIL haven't paid their own rent or council tax in at least 20 years. Housing Benefit all the way despite secretly earning. MIL gets around her maximum allowed savings cap by overpaying her gas and electric each week and keeping wads of cash in her purse and in a drawer at home. She gets a rebate from the utilities companies of around £900 and £800 every year.

FIL never spends any money whatsoever (all bills and the like came from MIL's account and FIL has never set foot in a shop in all the time I've known him (coming up for 20 years). When MIL and I arrived home from her weekly shopping trip last week FIL said, "The window cleaner's been round! I had to give him £6. Don't forget"

I asked her what he meant and she was busy getting him £6 that she apparently owed him out of her purse. I guess only MIL looks out of their windows eh?

A few years ago we discovered that FIL has been squirrelling away all his money and had £33K stashed in his bedroom. He only fessed up when he realised that the old notes were being discontinued and he needed to get them changed ASAP. As he would never step foot in a bank (he leaves all that nonsense to the missus!) he had to tell MIL.

MIL is more generous with her money but it does have to be very much on her terms. If we go out for dinner she won't let you pay no matter what you say but then you can't have dessert or a second glass of coke. And if you try to buy your own she gets huffy and throws a tantrum.
Once when DH and I were skint we were in Primark. (We'd driven MIL and BIL there) MIL was grabbing things off the shelves for our DC saying they needed this and that and that she was paying. I made the mistake of politely saying that DC wouldn't wear the jeans she had picked up because I didn't want her wasting her money. She huffed and carried on. We got to the tills, she put it all on and let the cashier scan it all and promptly walked away leaving us to buy over £100 of clothes we couldn't afford. Awkward as fuck. We paid and made do with pasta meals until payday. Now we make sure to split up when shopping. MIl with BIL together and DH, DC and I go get our own stuff and meet up after.