to think that able bodied, neurotypical adults should be able to behave appropriately in a theatre?

[DrSeuss]

I don't often get to the theatre as tickets are very expensive. Therefore, when I do go, I don't want it spoiled.

Based on today's trip, someone needs to tell some members of the audience the following-
Find your seat in advance of the show, not ten minutes in.
Buy your snacks and drinks in advance, not at intervals through the show so that half your row has to stand to let you out.
Buy appropriate snacks, i.e., ones that can be eaten without a lot of noise, not ones that crunch loudly or have wrappers that make a lot of noise.
If the show is different to the film, I don't need to know nor do I need your extended opinion on this mid show.
Similarly, I do not want to hear your loud predictions on what will happen next.

All of the above were behaviours from adults who appeared to be neurotypical. I fully accept that some of them may not have been but surely not all of them? My nine year old daughter was better behaved than many adults, having been told from her first trip to the theatre as a much smaller child that it was necessary to sit still and be quiet.

I will probably told that I sound judgemental. Mostly, I resent spending my limited resources on a treat which I have been looking forward to for ages then having it spoiled. Would they like it if I came and jumped around in front of their much anticipated TV programme making a lot of noise?

Speaking as a cinema employee and occaisional theatre & gig goer, behaviour is definitely getting worse.
So much entitlement.

Great thread OP. Oh how I have wanted to rant on this very subject and here I can do it surrounded by people who know how to behave properly in a theatre concert hall.

My current source of the absolute screaming inner judging at obnoxious and foolish twots who attend concerts of live screenings of films accompanied by full orchestra playing the soundtrack. We go to the Liverpool Phil at least once a year to see these and they are absolutely fantastic, until that is the film ends and the credits start to roll...

and about a third of the audience get up and leave WHILE THERE IS A FULL ORCHESTRA CONTINUING TO PLAY.

We went to see Harry Potter a few weeks ago and as sure as eggs is eggs the credits roll and the morons get up and noisily walk out. I do wonder what they think the rest of us are doing sitting quietly listening to the LIVE MUSIC, and then applauding at the end.

Sunshine you know you didn’t spend £50 for a ticket to watch something that’s coming round on ITV2 at least twice this year if you care to wait long enough.

It’s like they don’t even understand what an orchestra is or what they are doing there.

Fuckwits.

Don’t get me started on people who eat natchos or crunchy crisps during these performances.

Nearly 30 years ago (a statement which makes me feel v. old), I was at the RST in Stratford, I think to watch Hamlet. The full length version. Which is, of course, just the play to take your baby to. Okay, fair enough, if baby’s not actually howling... but of course, the baby was howling. And its two pre school siblings were squealing and trying to escape. While mother and father loudly shushed them. And then they had the nerve to come back after the interval...

I suspect that the more expensive the tickets, the more entitled the behaviour.

I've been late in to theatres (time blind and misjudged travel time) and have sat at the back or waited until a scene change before taking up my actual seat.

Last night, I stayed in a seat at the back until the interval.

The constant rustling, crunching, chatting and beeping from phones drives me nuts.

We recently went to see the Lion King at our local theatre. As we go there often I hadn't appreciated that the seating is different for LK and that rows AA, A and B are squashed in together so tightly that you can't move.

I'd booked A. The people in front of us were 2 adults and 2 large children, perhaps 10 and 8. As soon as it started, the children sat on their parents laps, with the largest boy on father. So instead of having one large head in front of me I had 2, (they were level), which obstructed the corner of the stage.

The 2 women behind us talked all the way through. Non stop. About the production, but along the lines of isn't it clever how they did that. They did not stop. Meanwhile, the people next to us got up 3 times during the performance. Because the seats were so tight it meant that we had to get up and leave the row to let them out, and then again when they came back. Frustrating thing was that when I booked the tickets they had already booked theirs, so knowing they were going to get up and down constantly why on earth didn't they book the aisle seats?

I hate confrontation and will do anything to avoid it, but couldn't help myself after one cinema visit. There were three women say behind me who kept chatting. Then they'd miss what had happened, so the one who had paid some attention then had to fill them in, so then they missed the next part. It was constant. I turned to them a few times but they didn't take the hint, so at the end I pointed out that they'd totally ruined the film for me and I hoped they'd not do it again in the future. The friend I was with was modified!

The other thing we've had recently was at an outdoor performance of a Midsummer Night's Dream. Despite leaving home in plenty of time there was a huge problem on the Motorway so we dashed in with minutes to spare. Staff were actually seating people in rows, unusually, so we set up where we were put, but loads of people had been caught in the queues and continued to come in behind us.

A family of adults arrived just after us and were chatting away as they set up their chairs just along from us in the same row. By this time the cast had come on and were singing. These people continued to chat, with people turning round and glaring at them. Then the man fell through his chair, and sat there looking stunned. Woman started to laugh at him and he was asking her to pull him out, no attempt at being quiet.

Someone from behind us stomped through to haul him up, then they carried on rearranging themselves, still chatting away. Eventually a man about 3 rows in front of us turned round and bellowed "will you shut up!". People applauded him, and the family looked a bit stunned and didn't make another sound.

We managed to watch the rest of the first half in peace, but the people immediately behind us were wearing oilcloth coats that they decided to keep putting on and taking off throughout the second half, which was annoying. Two other families with very small children were having some sort of joint picnic and letting the children run around and squeal at the back of the field, but we could still hear them.

At a separate outdoor theatre it was raining (not hard), and all the people who'd got there early had huge umbrellas up. The cast came out and said if people had hoods could they use them instead as the umbrellas were blocking the view, and if they couldn't do that could they move to the back. Not one did.They were spread all across in front of the stage so there wasn't an area you could move to where you could see.

The umbrella family sitting dead centre also had a toddler in a pushchair who got bored after the first 20 minutes and started crying, shouting and so on, so not only could we not see, we couldn't hear either. It was a play, with no singing, just speaking. No attempt to sort him out and the staff didn't intervene. We won't be bothering with live events at that particular venue again.

I honestly feel this has been worse this year than ever before. It costs such a lot to go to any sort of event and it's always full of these idiots thinking they are at home.

Yanbu

YANBU. You want to talk, do it at home. Don't do it when other people have paid to see the show.

When people do start to talk I think the best tactic is to say straight away, calmly, politely and fairly audibly "excuse me, could you not talk please, it's very distracting, thanks".
This is my tactic. Some people look really shocked (like, you thought it was OK??!). One woman once started chuntering and hissing away at me, until the cinema usher stepped in. I don't know what people think they're doing. I've actually stopped going to the cinema because I can't face the stress of wondering when the talking/phone use is going to start or whether it'll have to be me who tells them to stop it.