Am I strange for being scared of vomit?

[Lolly122]

So just want to know if I’m being unreasonable. This might sound a bit strange but I need to know that I’m not going crazy. Basically I am terrified of vomit. I’ve felt this way since as long as I can remember and it effects me greatly. But the problem is that my partner is very unsupportive towards it. He says I’m putting it on and it’s made up. For example, last night he woke me up being sick. I ran downstairs, got on the sofa and put a blanket over my head. I was shaking, sweating, crying, had my fingers in my ears and I even considered getting in my car and driving somewhere. The only reason I didn’t was because it was 2 in the morning. I slept on the sofa all night and in the morning he was having a go at me saying I’m pathetic and being dramatic. It effects me in every way possible. If someone on TV is being sick I have to look away even though I know it’s not real. This is another thing he has a go at me about. It’s something I just can’t deal with in anyway and as I said before, it effects me greatly. He says I need to go to the doctors and get help with it, which I agree, but he doesn’t mean it in a supportive way. I just want some advice on how to get him to support me with this rather than him making me feel like I shouldn’t feel this way. I know it may not seem like much of a problem to some, but at the end of the day, this is a genuine fear of mine and I’m being made to feel weak/weird/pathetic by the one person that should be supporting me. I guess I just need to know he’s the one with the problem, not me. Thank you for reading and listening to my crazy self

On Boxing Day my dad got really drunk and thew up in it

Oh that's properly horrible OP, what a shitty thing for him to do.

Was your DP sick because of drinking too?

Sorry if this triggers anyone but once I woke my daughter up, picked her up out her cot and she was sick all down me.

It was a massive surprise but the adrenaline kicked in and I did manage not to drop her or shout at her and took her downstairs and took her clothes off (my husband was out but I had to leave the mess for him to clear up). I did actually cope much better than I thought. Strangely though it hasn't helped at all with the phobia, it's like the dread of it happening is actually mostly worse than the reality. And I guess its probably much worse if it's not my baby. Honestly I think if another adult being sick on me I'd struggle not to get violent, and I'd definitely cry

I kind of wonder if it's a logical fear. I mean you can get sick from being near other peoples vomit so maybe it's just a natural instinct or self preservation mechanism that is a bit over tuned or something?

Yeah, he’d been out drinking with his friends. I was already on edge while he was out hoping and praying he wouldn’t go over the top incase he’s sick. My hopes and prayers obviously didn’t work now every time he goes out I can’t sleep because all I can think is that he’s going to be sick. I even sometimes set up bed on the sofa on the nights he goes out

@GettingABitDesperateNow nice to hear to adrenaline kicked in and didn’t effect you too bad. I hope that’s what happens to me when the time comes. I think you’re right about the thought of it being worse than the reality. It’s like our brain knows we are scared and we can’t help but think and worry about it

Ah see I'm not scared of vomit if I can be 100% certain it's not contagious.

So a drunk person (as long as it wasn't on/near me) like if my DH was drunk and throwing up I'd be relatively normal.

And if my pets are I'm mega easy about it. Maybe even better than most.

It's if myself or DC could catch it that freaks me. So when we're out I'm very very big on hand washing etc.

I have it! It used to be much worse, but I had hypnotherapy about five years ago and now it's much more manageable. I used to think it would always be hanging over me, but it's a much smaller part of my life now.

Oh that's no good Lolly, is he irritable with you particularly after drinking too?

I have milder emetophobia (enough for me to go round with Boots anti-viral hand foam at all times, and a packet of Buccastem in my bag!)

Mine stems from my alcoholic father somehow I'm sure.

I just avoid it in general. Can’t stand it if someone’s drunk or just ill. I’m always checking dates on food and rarely eat meat just because I’m so scared of getting ill. Doesn’t help my partner doesn’t really care if his meats a bit pink and doesn’t care eating food that’s out of date

My dd has this. She started at about 8 yrs. she’s 13 now I’m looking at cbt for her if she gets worse.

I remember a few years ago he came in after a night out. He wasn’t all that drunk so I was ok. But then decided to tell me he felt sick at the start of the night so he shoved his fingers down his throat and threw up. THEN decided to tell me he wasn’t happy because it went on his new trainers. I still can’t look at them trainers and I just sat there wondering why anyone would make theirselves be sick

@madeyemoodysmum yes I would. I wish I would have done a long time ago

@GettingABitDesperateNow

Yes this is how I see it, disgust is a very innate response and is designed to keep us safe by making us move away from something that could make us ill/spread disease- vomit, rotten meat, puss, phlegm etc. It seems plausible that emetophobia is an exaggerated response to danger that is extremely hard to control and at times completely impossible to rationalise.

It can be exceptionally debilitating and I think I was lucky that over time mine has morphed somewhere towards the ‘normal’ spectrum.

I'm another emetophobe and can also trace the source to an incident in my childhood. I deal with it better since having had cats. I'm OK on public transport and in amusement parks although I do consciously keep an eye out for queasy looking people. Whilst DP hasn't made himself ill through drink since being a teenager, if he is planning on an exceptionally heavy night on a night he would normally be at mine, he is strongly encouraged to stay elsewhere.

Don't read on if stories containing vomit upset you too much. Do read on if you are able to handle it and you would like to read about me, unintentionally, being a dick.

Once, a long time ago, I was outside of a recreation centre unlocking my bicycle. It was steel framed, quite heavy and I found it difficult to lift. This will become relevant.

A man came out with his young child. He had taken the child swimming, where the child had, of course, swallowed a load of pool water. He had then taken the child to the cafe. He had then, unwisely, decided to carry the child on his shoulders where the child was being bobbed up and down. You can guess what happened next. The child produced an absolute geyser of vomit covering the man from head to toe.

The man, who was still about 20 meters away, vaguely looked in my direction for help. I'm afraid the fight or flight response kicked in instantly and, as I had nowhere to go, I had that bike above my shoulders ready to beat him off like I'd just channelled The Hulk. The man turned sadly and headed back into the recreation centre.

I did feel sorry for him but not until a bit of time and a lot of distance had passed. Still, though, Emetophobia! Super annoying or super power?

@Lolly122 I have no idea how to DM on here. I take 25mg of Chlomiperamine a day (started on 50mg about 10 years ago. It's changed my life. I also have Stemetil (anti-emetic) on repeat. My doctor is amazing. Therapy has been useless. My first husband made me feel like I was mad with this.

My DD developed this as a teen. It was crippling and stopped her from socialising. She tried several different types of therapy to no avail until she discovered Thrive
It was a total game changer and she hasn't had a problem since.

It is no stranger than any other apparently irrational fear. When you get right down to it there are much weirder ones.

On a good note my DS 14 who has had to deal with his own vomiting all his life is SO chilled out about being sick. It doesn't pass down.

Emetophobia is the third or fourth most common phobia (after flying, small spaces, public speaking) but so few people know about it! I also thought I was crazy and only realised this had a name during the earliest days of the internet when there was one website on it.

I strongly recommend Rob Kelly's Thrive program and Youtube videos. Emetophobia is much harder to cure than various other mental health disorders and that's why sufferers can feel a bit hopeless. I tried talk therapy, EMDR, CBT but my negative thinking patterns kept coming back. It was only delving into the Thrive program that made me understand exactly why these thoughts/behaviours are happening. Psychologically speaking, it's very similar to anorexia which is obviously a very common MH problem predominantly affecting females. Sufferers tend to have the same personality profile - perfectionist, scared of losing control, socially anxious or introverted. It all depends on whether you have a stronger desire to be thin (anorexia) or if you have a stronger dislike for disgusting things and losing control (emetophobia).

I did the Thrive program with a consultant over Skype and I would say my phobia has improved significantly but not entirely gone. The closest I can describe it is like staying on a very strict diet or, I imagine, staying sober if you're an alcoholic. The thoughts around food safety, checking expiry dates, norovirus, other people being sick, pregnancy etc are always there and it's a daily battle to stop acting on them. Eventually, some behaviours will fade away as you become accustomed to something so you are "cured" in that area, but realistically, there will always be niggling thoughts in other places.

I had this quite severely as a child and teenager but it stopped when I went to university. I’ve no idea why. But I would say it really had a profound effect on me growing up.
I was so scared that might children might develop it that if they were ever sick I would try and make it as trauma free as possible and I’d get them a nice present. The misery it caused me just made me so worried for them but they seem fine.
I’m so sorry to everyone going through this I really feel for you.

I've had this for years. I'm worse with the thought of other people being sick than myself being sick. I hate my oh going out drinking as I worry he wil come home and vomit (even though he never does) and I avoid planes cos I'm stuck and can't move away if someone is sick. I went on a little ferry trip over summer with the kids and I couldn't sleep the night before for fear of people getting sea sick and I couldn't relax the whole time on the ferry.
I'm getting obsessive regarding cooking meat and always burn it to ensure it is cooked and have stopped cooking or ordering rice as I've heard that is a contributer to food poisoning and I've started avoiding drunk people .

I've found my thoughts are worse than the actual events... When my kids are sick, I can clean it up and can stay with them to comfort them (unless they are being sick in the toilet, for some reason the sound of sick in the toilet is worse for me)

I'm going to try some of the you tube videos suggested on the is thread as I would love not to feel like this. All one of my kids has to say is "my tummy hurts" and I obsess for days.

Mine passed down from my mum and I’ve somehow passed it on to my son.

Weirdly once I’m sick my adrenaline gets me through it, then I’ll have a few months of being terrified I’ll be sick again. It’s so weird. Mine peaks and troughs as well with my mood and current anxiety!

When my stepson came to live with me at 5 years old he hadn’t been looked after properly ad his immune system was horrendous as well as his guts so there was years of frequent vomiting which kinda helped a bit. I do not want exposure therapy though!!!

@Chocolatemouse84 reheated rice can cause food poisoning but not dry in a bag cook at home rice. As long as you don't reheat it. I also found using a digital meat thermometer helped me. If it says it's cooked it's cooked. :)
stop reading if you can't deal with stories about sick

My phobia of vomit started when I was 12, my dad died and sadly he didn't have a pleasant death we had intended to get the hospice involved but it happened very suddenly. Anyway I digress, he came home from hospital and vomited continuously for 2 days and couldn't even speak without retching it was awful. I didn't like vomit anyway (who does) but the day after the worst of the vomiting he died. But I know now that it is totally irrational. I won't die if I'm sick. So I guess cbt is working.

I have it too. I’d rather die than be sick