Well, the doorbell just rang - the Queen's here! Unfortunately it turns out 5 minutes isn't long enough to do bloody anything!! All I managed was:
Went for a quick wee.
Picked my soggy towels off the bathroom floor, chucked them over the banisters so they landed in the hallway, thinking I'd have time to run with them to the utility room at the end. I didn't, so they're the first thing Her Majesty is going to see!
Screwed the lid back on the toothpaste and put it in the bathroom cabinet.
Rinsed the bath out. Just in case she feels like taking one! (She might, it's one of those jet spa baths!)
Reattached the bath pillow with those suction cup things.
Clipped the protective cover onto one of my razors.
Shoved the book that was on top of the laundry basket into one of the bathroom drawers.
Arranged the showergel nicely.
Scrubbed an icky ring of electric toothbrush scum off the sink.
Looped the cord of my plastic scrubby loofah thing neatly over one of the bath taps.
Vacuumed some random hairs and a dead fly off the bathroom floor.
Pretended I didn't hear my timer going and quickly hoovered the one on my bedroom floor as well.
That was it, all I had time for. If I'd had longer I would have:
Put out a new bottle of handwash, and changed the hand towel in the bathroom.
Properly vacuumed my bedroom floor.
Folded my duvet etc neatly at the end of my bed (bedding currently in the tumbledryer).
Run a duster over the bedroom windowsill
Moved my laptops off the kitchen table - probably shoved them under my bed!
Put the ironing board away.
Hung the ironed clothing that's hanging from it in my wardrobe.
Put the random kitchen scissors that are on the table back in the drawer.
Run around with the hoover getting as many of the dead and dying flies as possible until she arrived.
But I didn't have longer, so I'll just have to hope she's not too shocked! Anyway, I'd better go and answer the door to her instead of just sitting here typing this!