Crappy friends

[DayDreamerDaisy]

I was due to meet up with a group of friends lastnight but at the last minute my grandchild (who lives with me) had an accident, resulting in going to a&e. When I told my 'friends' of the problem their response was "So you aren't coming then?". No concern for my grandchild or what was going on. They don't have children e.t.c themselves but still! They're crappy friends right?

They're not friends. You deserve better.

I think it depends, was or a minor injury? We're the parents there? If my DM lived with us , DS stubbed and potentially broke a toe and DH and I were both around to go to the hospital I wouldn't expect her to change her plans, in fact I'd think it a bit much if she insisted on coming to the hospital. They were rude not to ask how the GC was but not to ask if you were coming to the planned event or not.

It does depend on a few things. Do you have form for cancelling? How serious was the injury? Was their parent there to take them?

Yes they’re crappy friends. Recruit experienced one of my drop choosing not to respond to my text messages. I figured she was busy but then saw her “active” on Facebook commenting on a celebrity chef’s post with great enthusiasm. It’s honestly pathetic and not a reflection on you OP.

Well it’s a bit crap of them not to ask how your GC was but it’s a big leap to ask strangers on the internet if they’re “crappy friends”.

'Crappy friends' is a bit strong (based on your OP alone). It was a bit rude not to say 'Sorry to hear that' or 'Hope she's OK' - but how much did you tell them about the accident? I'm assuming it wasn't a major accident as you probably wouldn't have time to worry about your friends if your GC was seriously ill.

Unless there are other reasons to think badly of your friends, I think you should write this off as an instance of thoughtlessness. I hope your grandchild is recovering well .

Did you text and say "DGC has had an awful fall and is unconscious so I had to come in an ambulance with them to hospital" or did you 'check in' on Facebook and say "waiting for DGC to get his thumb xrayed" and tag your DD and SIL?

@AmIThough 😂 ah the good old hospital check in

It depends. If GCs parent(s) also live with you or GC was with them at the time I wouldn't automatically assume you would go to the hospital. My default with my kids is that I wouldn't want or need my parents at the hospital for an A&E trip. If you're GCs guardian/ main carer then that's a bit different. A bit thoughtless of them not to ask after GC though.

There are people I know who if they told me their grandchild was in A&E I'd feel genuine concern and ask questions. There are other people I know who would say that as a deliberately vague thing, seeking attention, sympathy and drama and I'd probably just roll my eyes. It depends if you are one of those people who loves to try and make everything about them.