What can I do.Feeling paranoid with hot flashes and colleagues mentioning smells😢

[whatisforteamum]

I've always loved work.A bit of a workaholic most say.Recently I've felt depressed and irritable so the Gp looked into HRT as a possibility as DM had ovarian cancer so it has taken time to obtain.
Meanwhile I am having more hot flushes.I also work in a very hot environment.So for a few years I get up at 7 have a bath.Have one in my lunch break with new clothes and one at night when I get in at 10.
The other day a teenage colleague was hungover and almost gagging at work.I was working near.them and decided perhaps my uniform hadn't dried properly so changed it.
They commented again.This co league doesn't particularly like me and as far as I know wants my position at work.
The next day someone said they could smell cabbage!.
When I was doing some strenuous work at the end of the day I had a huge hot rush come over me.
I've always maintained great personal hygiene and clean clothes.I've invested in the best fruity shampoos and deodorants.
My self esteem is in my boots.WWYD.I do have extra uniform s btw.Help.
Also I know there is a kind of witch hunt on me of sorts which I have never experienced as the team changed a bit and I am 30 plus years older than most of them now.

Please don’t buy a lot of strong sprays- they really do smell bad when overdone. Ask a trusted friend if they can smell anything, it’s highly unlikely to be body odour if you are washing this much.

Go and speak to your GP. As mentioned above some medical conditions can cause odour. Speak to a manager if you feel bullied and above all, I hope you feel better soon. HRT switched my hot flushes off almost overnight.

I would get yourself to the go pronto to check you don’t have a physical ailment. Some people say they can smell cancer for example, not that I’m saying it is this. Can you go on hrt for the sweats? Check out the risks btw as hrt does increase certain types.

How do your clothes smell when they get out of the washing machine? Perhaps that needs cleaning - look up ways of cleaning the machine if it is - eg white vinegar, lavender oil etc. You can also add unstoppables to fragrance the wash but this will work out ever so expensive.

I think it's more likely that you don't smell nasty and either your colleagues are bullying you or you are unusually anxious because of the menopause. Though antibactierial cleanser added to the wash is a good idea if you work in a stinky environment.

I worked in a very hot environment at one time and found it dreadful :( I used to have to wash my feet in the whb in the loos about three times a day Luckily I'm quite limber... Pile on the anti-perspirant and top up during the day. Make sure all clothes are thoroughly dried as soon as out of the washing machine. Nothing worse than putting on something 'clean' then when it heats up it smells manky.

also add unstoppables to fragrance the wash

Whass them things?

It sounds a bit too coincidental that these comments are being made & you think someone is after your position.

Given how much you wash & change your clothes I doubt you actually smell & it is more likely that people see you flushing and sweating so are making comments to make you feel self-conscious & uncomfortable.

Speak to your manager or HR team. Menopause is a protected characteristic in law. They should be taking steps to protect you.

I really don’t believe you smell OP. I think you’ve become paranoid due to your work situation.

Hungover at work sounds really pathetic and unprofessional

I think you’re being bullied. They’ve picked up on your sensitivity about your ‘smell’ and using it to undermine you.

Definitely go to doctor and get as much information as you can about homeopathic remedies that may help.

If you have an HR department get an appointment with them and report what’s happening.

Sorry you’re experiencing this. 💐

Being smelly is not a Meno symptom so I doubt very much that you smell

This is just one of the many sites that say otherwise @Thehagonthehill

menopausehealthmatters.com/symptoms-of-menopause/change-in-body-odour/

Op this is horrible for you. It sounds like your personal hygiene is more than adequate. I imagine the smell might be clothing. I used to use an airer and clothes smelled fine until I got warm while wearing them and then a nasty smell came out. I got a tumble dryer and clothes are dried quickly and fully. You can get mini ones that sit on the worktop if space is an issue, it might make your life easier with doing laundry too?

I don't think you smell. I think they are ganging up on you at work.
Go to the GP and tell them what you have told us here and ask if they think you smell.

What did the teenage colleague who gagged actually say to you?
The other day a teenage colleague was hungover and almost gagging at work.I was working near.them and decided perhaps my uniform hadn't dried properly so changed it.They commented again.

It's not clear what they actually said!

Some teenagers can be very disrespectful of people older than themselves and say things like this which aren't true. They're not quite out of the school mindset of getting at someone else by saying "you smell". It's a cheap insult and doesn't require any imagination to think up. It's similar to "ugly". I've been told I'm ugly several times by teenagers.
I wonder if they have seen your hot flushes and you washing at lunchtime and changing uniform and concluded you must smell (even if you don't) and see it as a way of bullying you.

I really don't believe that you do smell with all that washing unless you aren't washing your clothes hot enough. I find that 30 degrees is all well and good for the environment but I find it doesn't get the smell out of clothes I have heavily sweated into. They smell fresh until I heat up again and then the smell comes out.

bless you. I bet it is not you. sweat does not smell like cabbage! to be sure, make sure you use antiperspirant and not body sprays. I like the sure cream one. and get a tumble drier. I'd also ask for new uniforms too and start again, once sweat is in polyester, it is hard to get the smell out. this kid sounds like a proper dick. so sorry to hear they are treating u like this x

Your colleague is an immature prick. But I understand why this is bothering you, no one wants to think that their odour/hygiene is causing a problem for colleagues, it's embarrassing.

My advice would be the following although I accept that this might not be something that you are comfortable with, however I do think that it would make the young man even less comfortable and likely to shut up.

I'd make light hearted comments about it if it is brought up again. So if he says he can smell something in your vicinity again, just remark - "Oh Keith, you always seem to have an issue with smell when you are near me, do you think it could be my hormones? I'm going through the change and the pheromones that I'm giving off could be what you're smelling. It's normal for women my age to go through these changes and despite showering 3 times a day and changing my clothes at lunchtime it will sometimes be noticeable to someone who is sensitive to this sort of thing."

He is then both aware that him saying something won't bother you, aware that you are doing your best to combat it and also aware that it is normal and that if he continues to go on that he is potentially bullying someone for something they cannot control which is dangerous territory in a work place.

I get it if you aren't comfortable discussing it but it's often the best way to take someone's ability to upset you away from them.

Surely everyone gets hot and sweaty in a kitchen? My friend used to work in one and said it was unbearable during menopause.
I doubt you smell as fresh sweat doesnt and you are washing a lot throughout your work day.
Your colleagues sound like a bunch of stupid kids.
I also think the rank smell of sweated out alcohol on someone hungover is way way worse than a bit of sweat.
I think i would have complained about that tbh.
As for the cabbage smell? It's a kitchen, the drains could be iffy if bits of food get down the sinks.

Swap to a proper soap not dove etc.
Run your washing machine on hot with a tad of bleach.
Dry thing til their properly dry, on radiators?

If you're having a hot flush you won't smell, it's unwashed clothes and no showers for a day/S that do that.

I doubt you smell, you sound very clean!! But … have you considered that if there IS an odour, could it be your clothes? I used to work with a woman who occasionally smelled, and I came to the conclusion that the smell was actually in her clothes, not coming from her body. I have had tops that appear to be still in good condition, but then further inspection has shown that there is a bit of an odour around the armpits. This may not smell too bad, but once worn it's as though the heat from my (clean) body 'activates' it. Even washing after every use doesn't get rid, and I have ended up binning them. DH and I viewed a house a few months ago: when we left, he said 'what was that smell? Was it the owner?' and it was her clothes, I could tell. It's a different smell to BO. So I would suggest going through your clothes and checking them, and make sure you are drying things properly. Clothes dried wrong can smell musty or like mildew. Add that to a warm body, and it will smell.

I think you’re being bullied
I think so, too.

Are you overweight? There was a 'thing' a few years ago where a radio dj started a near-campaign, 'Fat people stink!' and it was everywhere. Young people took it as a green light to be as insulting as they liked.

Some teenagers can be very disrespectful of people older than themselves and say things like this which aren't true
Exactly.

Smells are a by product of menopause. Always use non scented pant liners. As the discharge changes. Change then them throughout the day. Wash clothes at a higher temperature with bio powder
Make sure they are dried thoroughly to avoid that damp wet dog type niff

Shower in the morning before work

OP is the PP right that you work in a kitchen? If so that would generate far more smells (particularly potential cabbagey ones!) than you could! It doesn't sound like you could possibly smell. I think your colleagues are being a bunch of little shits and making you paranoid.

Cloedee : not sure i've posted this in the right bit i'm new on here, just looking for some advice or some ladies who have went through something similar.

Maybe post your question on the mumsnet pregnancy boards?

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/pregnancy

There was a 'thing' a few years ago where a radio dj started a near-campaign, 'Fat people stink!' and it was everywhere.

Whaaaaaaat? Was that in the UK and recently? It passed me by completely! Sounds like something that would have happened in the '90s.

I was equally paranoid with my period yesterday. I'm a recent grad working in engineering so am basically the only female on my (big) floor! I could've cried when a colleague was leaning over me to look at my computer! You have my sympathy. Hopefully it's just in our heads.

Those instant flushes are awful . Soaked from head to toe ...starting from the top down for me. It happened if I got stressed or had a coffee.
The menopausal symptoms can change and vary .

It sound like you are working in a stressful environment with some not very nice colleagues.

Make sure you use soap not those gels for washing .

Regarding your clothes ..it may be where you dry them . It may not even be you at all .
Follow the laundry advice above . Maybe post on menopause health thread.

The advice on here is massively weird!, there is very little chance you smell. Using really strong smelling things to wash and that they know you are washing and changing in the day means they know you dread that and are possibly making fun of you. That's IF that is what is being said. I think because this is your fear you are putting 2 and 2 together and getting an orange.
Also the hungover (at work, really classy) person might well have gagged at the smell of something nice as bad because the senses were all screwed up.
If you are worried about smell then don't use heavily scented things. Not everyone likes the fruit or floral and you might find they clash oddly as well especially if your sense of smell is being affected by the hormonal changes in your body (pregnancy did this to me). Wean yourself off onto unscented products, maybe just stick to one scent, especially if you work around food as there will be so many smells competing for attention!